The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[SuzyQ66]

Happy Thanksgiving T. I hope all is going well with you.

[SuzyQ66]

Hey T...how did Thanksgiving and your weekend go? Did you do any shopping??

[Tawanda]

Hi Sue, I had a nice Thanksgiving (I didn't have to cook or have a crowd at my house so little pressure on me this year). The weekend was laid back and low key. DH and I did do a tiny bit of shopping on Saturday morning, not Christmas gifts, just mundane odds and ends. Today I've been house cleaning......exciting life.

[SuzyQ66]

Hi T - I hope all is going well. Have you started or gotten done your Christmas shopping yet? You mentioned in an earlier post that you bought a case of the bars. How many are in a case? I didn't see the option on the MF website to buy a case. Am I missing something? The bars are really coming in handy with all the runny I have been doing lately....I was thinking I might just need a case.

[smartipantz]

Hiya T,

What a great New Years Resolution to stay below your goal weight! You can do it - you are doing so well! It's tough getting back to the traditional way of eating FOOD again. Trust me, I know... I got down to 145 a couple years ago and waaalaaaaa..... here I am again, trying to get back down to my goal weight. It creeps up pretty darn fast. The New Years Resolution will help you alot!

How's your mother and brother doing?

Keri

[Tawanda]

Hi T - I hope all is going well. Have you started or gotten done your Christmas shopping yet? You mentioned in an earlier post that you bought a case of the bars. How many are in a case? I didn't see the option on the MF website to buy a case. Am I missing something? The bars are really coming in handy with all the runny I have been doing lately....I was thinking I might just need a case.

The case was 12 boxes for around $175 (7 bars in a box so 84 bars). If you order from the TSFL site, there should be the option 'case' directly below the crunch bar listing.

I have not had trouble with just eating one bar for a meal (thankfully). I had wondered with my history, of binge eating sweets, if I would fight with sticking with just eating one, but all is well with that.

I've been keeping myself busy with babysitting duties, Christmas preparations, housework and chauffering my mother to her many doctor appointments. Life seems to be moving along at warp speed.

Weight----- I'm still playing with extra pounds over my goal. I am still wearing the same size, my refusal to purchase larger clothing is still working in my favor. My clothes are obviously tight which is not as flattering nor comfortable. There are many tops that I won't wear because they are too snug and the size 6 jeans haven't been pulled on for at least a month now. Thankfully the size 8s, that I was still wearing at my lowest weight, still fit. Otherwise I couldn't hold onto the soothing thought that I haven't had to move up to larger clothing (yet?). So.....I'm fudging a bit when I say I've not gone to bigger clothes---I am not able to wear the 6s that I was so proud of-----the size 8 jeans seemed to be the same fit as the 6 jeans so I just kept and wore them.....but now they are very snug.

I just keep screwing around with these pounds. They aren't much but they do make a difference in how my clothes fit, look and how I feel about myself. Gone is the pride in losing almost 70# (at my lowest I was at 68# lost).......now I am embarrassed that I'm wearing, obviously, tight clothes.

I was reading a daily devotional/motivation site and reviewed something I read quite a long time ago. It was that we mentally rebel against doing things that we don't want to do when we feel that we *should* do them. But those same things are very doable and much easier if we tell ourselves that we *want* to do it-----getting rid of the *should* and replacing it with *want* adds excitement, anticipation, eagerness which brings success.

It makes sense......

I begin my day thinking: I *should* just go back onto 5-1 until I get back to goal weight. It is just a few pounds and I'd be so much happier with myself if I weren't so lazy, impulsive (with my food choices) and if I would just do what I *should* and get these pounds off.

Within hours I see something that my bratty, food addicted, gluttonous inner brat wants------and I usually give into my whims/desires. Then I'm back to *should*. I *should* have stuck to my plan. What a failure I am, what a glutton, what a loser, what a fat pig, I'm going to gain all my weight back, I can never be a success, I may as well give up right now and just enjoy eating myself into an early grave............

Aren't those negative voices in our heads wonderful? Charming? Kind? Loving? Uplifting? Truthful????? No----not at all.

But-----if I replace *should* and get excited about treating myself to something wonderful----what was a very difficult chore becomes an enjoyable (and very doable) job.

If I begin my day (as I did this morning after my self-talk) in a positive manner and tell myself that I *want* to stay on program because I *want* to enjoy the success that I have enjoyed previously with MediFast--then my whole attitude becomes *I CAN DO THIS!!!!* instead of *should do it*.......

I wish I knew how to explain it better.

*want* makes me feel lighter (mood wise)----*should* weighs me down
*want* makes me feel positive, *should* makes me mad, sad and defiant
*want* becomes 'I can do this' which then becomes 'I am doing it!!!' , *should* tells me that I am going to fail in my struggle to resist my foody desires sometime today or tomorrow.
*want* gives me power/makes me feel powerful, *should* drains me instantly

I'm not doing a good job of 'plaining this And what makes me feel good, hopeful and stronger may not work for anyone else.....but it does kind of make sense if we think of jobs that we just hate to do. If we are told we have to do something it becomes a chore. Dependant on how much we don't want to do something, the chore can go from just a bit hard and distasteful to a full blown pity party, big sigh, sadness or rebellion.......where we binge as soon as we can find ANY excuse.

But if we want to do something the chore becomes enjoyable. I'm having a hard time coming up with an example to use........dang it!

Anyway........I have tried to figure out what the magic is that makes dieting, losing weight and sticking to a food program so easy some times. As it was for me when I began MF and lost so much weight. Then I try to follow the same program that was so doable and easy before, but I struggle and cannot find the 'magic' again.......

Well, I think the 'magic' is within us. We get to a mental spot where we hit bottom and we want to get the weight off so badly that we will do anything to be successful. We *want* it-----

So, we begin the program. We do wonderfully, at first because we *want* the goal. Then we do wonderfully because we *want* the goal but also our success carries us along.

Pretty soon though, our *want* attitude changes and it is replaced by *should*. I *should* continue to stick to program instead of 'I *want* to stick to program.....

See? As soon as we go from 'I *want* to do this' to 'I *should* do this' then our inner brat recognizes or feels that we are being deprived and we dig our heels in. We decide that going off program is 'necessary' for some reason......

This is far too long and I'm not even sure that it is understandable.

All I know for sure is that once I decided that I *want* to get back to my goal weight that I felt so empowered and that I was going to do it.

When I change that to 'I *should* stick to program so I can get back to my goal weight.' then I feel heavy, weighted down with burdens and like I'm trudging through very deep mud. The job is too hard. I don't want to do this! I don't want to avoid the foods everyone else are enjoying. I am going to fail..............

I think it is 95% attitude that makes us successful in taking the weight off.

I'm going to devote my day to adjusting my attitude to excitement and wanting to succeed----

Today:
I *want* to stick to program.

[DogMa]

I think you explained yourself just fine; I totally understand what you're saying. I'll go one step further, even. Sometimes, even better than I "want" to do something is "I GET to do it." As in, "Yay! I get to take a long walk today" or even "Yay! I get to have a bar this afternoon." It may be silly sometimes, but I try to remind myself that I'm LUCKY to be able to do this stuff.

Bummer about the jeans, but you've still accomplished a whole lot just to be in the 8's. And I have no doubt that you'll make it back into the 6's if you set your mind to it.

[DutchChoc]

Nice post, Tawanda. I think it's easy to start to panic and let things get into the "should", as though it's only with extreme pressure we can get ourselves to do something that's challenging and, let's face it, unless I'm deluded, not as much gratifying "fun" at the time. Well, the old saying is a moment on the lips and a (I forgot what here, a measure of longer time) on the hips. I guess it's time to start protecting the hips as though they are worth more than the moment of pleasure. Even better if we can find things other than the food to produce the same pleasure, I guess.

May you enjoy a very good day because you "can".

[Lauren]

I LOVE that post, T.! You absolutely hit the nail on the head, and your explanation was spot on, really!

I remember that every step of the way during my weight loss process I was excited! Honestly, people would question if I felt deprived, if it was difficult, if I was annoyed that I couldn't participate in their food, whatever, and I swear that I felt like what Robin just said, it was a "YAY!" for me all the time! I felt lucky that I found MF. Lucky that I could breathe easier, that I didn't feel guilty anymore, that there was a lightness to my step. Every single time I ate an MF meal I "re"-felt that same joy that I was "choosing" and "wanting" this. And yes, attitude is nearly everything!

It gets harder in maintenance to continue that level of enthusiasm (besides it may piss off my friends, ha!), but being reminded of it just brought it right back home. I posted last week in Maintenanceland that getting accolades also serves as a reminder, but this one is really a good one!

I think you're doing great, T., but don't let the few pounds slip further. You'll beat yourself up about it. It's not that there is anything wrong (at all!) with size 8 or size 10 pants, it's that you felt your best and most proud and most excited in the size 6 ones, and you DESERVE to feel that good all the time. So don't let that go, okay?

Best to you!

Lauren

[Tawanda]

I'm thankful that my thoughts were of some help to others. I know it wasn't rocket science , but for some reason I needed to remember that everything is so much easier when we are excited and wanting it with anticipation, excitement and willingness to work towards making it successful.

Yesterday was a wonderful day for me in regards to keeping my 'want' (and, yes, even " I get to do this!" ) attitude. I did go through a short bit of time in the afternoon where I was already 'tired' of not getting to eat whatever I wanted, LOL. All I had to do was sit for a couple minutes while I ran my earlier 'should' vs 'want' thoughts through my head along with the bonuses of 'wanting' to do this versus the drawbacks of having to do it because I 'should'. I was able to get myself excited and happy about staying on program----because I wanted to stick to program and not because I had to. I 'get' to lose my extra pounds which will allow me to, once again, wear those smaller sizes and feel light, good and proud of myself as I did many months ago.

So........today is going to be another 'good' day.......I feel it.

The graphics on this site haven't been working for me for over 24 hours. It is a bit odd to see a lot of little red 'x's everywhere.

I hope everyone has a great day with a great attitude & a lot of excitement over our good fortune in having a safe and effective way to take off our extra pounds. Whether they be 10# or 100# or more.....we have the power if we chose to get excited and keep a positive 'I am so lucky to be able to do this!' attitude.

I hope it works for you and that we can all keep that mindset.

[SuzyQ66]

T: Boy did your posts hit home. I felt the same way when I started gaining all my weight back. It was such a burden and I tried to get back on MF but just couldn't do it. I am glad I finally fought through that and was able to get back into the MF groove. Is it easy...no...not as easy as that first time around. The weight is coming off at about the same pace but the attitude is sometimes harder to convince...'I should' should be 'I want.' Believe me, I totally get it. However, I just ignore that little bratty self inside of me...knowing in the end that this is the best program for me. Thanks for sharing. And the tip regarding the bars.

[Tawanda]

Another good day (so far) which means I stayed on program. I did get hungry in the late morning so had 4 egg whites cooked in PAM cooking spray---60 calories. It got me through until lunch time. I'm going to have some baked chicken breast on salad greens with tomato and low cal Italian dressing for dinner (soon).

I had a bummer moment earlier today and it made my resolve to keep my positive attitude about wanting to continue to stick to program to get these extra pounds back off. What was it? I ordered a new pair of dressy pants----ordered a size 8 and they were too tight! I was able to zip and button them, but there is no way that I'd be able to wear them.

So------there goes my pride in not gaining enough so that I can't wear my clothes any longer. I've been kidding myself (but I wasn't fooled even when I was trying to convince myself by still wearing some of my jeans).

Another faux-pas that happened today was that I didn't think when transferring laundry from washer to dryer and I dried the jeans I wear all the time.........gulp! It does make a difference.... sigh!

So-----gone is the pride that I wore size 6, gone is the pride that I could toss my size 6 jeans into the dryer without them being too tight, gone is the pride that my size 8 jeans still fit, gone is the belief that I really was still a size 8........the only thing that isn't gone is those lousy pounds.



Determination is solid (how could it not be with all those darn, obvious size related happenings today?) as is my happiness that I have quite a bit of MF product on hand and will have no problem with not having a nice assortment of choices for each day.

Life is good........
Life is good.............
Life is very good.......
I'm extremely fortunate.

[DogMa]

You ARE fortunate, T. Heck, even as far as the weight gain, good for you for catching it early. As we all know, most people gain back everything they lost plus extra. So yay for you, for recognizing the problem and doing something about it!

[Tawanda]

Thanks Robin and Leigh, I'm not discouraged, the tight pants and the decision to quit trying to kid myself that these pounds haven't made that much of a difference in my size/clothing.

I do realize that it may sound a bit silly, stupid...or worse, to be complaining about size 8 pants being too tight. The day that I placed my first MF order I was wearing size 20 and they were very tight. That day I weighed 216---it was not my highest weight, I was 222 at my heaviest. I am living a delicious dream by wearing sizes in the single digits. I did not expect to ever get the weight off---heck, I had tried almost every diet over and over only to lose 20 to 40# and then eat my way back up over 200. So, hitting those single digit sizes was so wonderful, surprising and unexpected. I dreamt it---but didn't expect it to happen.

So......my disappointment in myself was great when I began doing the mindless eating once again.

I've been careful not to say how much weight I regained, haven't I?

To continue to stay honest with myself.......on my heaviest day--I regained 20#. Today I am 17.5# over my goal weight and, yes, I am very embarrassed to admit that. For months it was 'only' a 10# gain, but in the last 2 months I have allowed the pounds to creep up to 15# and then, on my heaviest day, it was 20#.

Robin, you are right.......I am fortunate that I've made the decision to stop the gaining and head back to my goal weight. My heart aches for everyone who has ever gained some or all of their weight loss back. I hope they won't allow the embarrassment or self directed anger to keep them from coming here to share and get support.

We've got almost 9" of snow. The grandbabies aren't coming today (roads too dangerous) and probably won't come tomorrow either. DH did make it to work (4 wheel drive truck) and I'm working on cabin fever.

I did just walk to our mailbox and back which is about 1/2 mile. Very difficult and tiring walking in the snow wearing boots. Especially on the uphill return part of the walk.

Guess that is it from here. Yesterday I stayed 100% on program. Calories 1025, pedometer steps 9947 and I did a great job with my water intake. All is good, determination and resolve are strong!

212# on day 1 of MF
147# goal weight (reached 3/15/2008)
164.5# current weight

[DogMa]

Good for you, T!! I know how hard it is to admit you've gained AND that you need help losing it. I fought it for a long time, too.

At least it's a lot easier to lose 20 than it is to lose ALL your weight again! (And I know, I hate complaining that I'm not losing and can't get into a smaller size when I'm already pretty darn small. But we've both been there, and we know how easy it is to go from a 6 or an 8 or a 10 to an 18 or 20 or more.)

And this may make it easier the NEXT time. I let myself gain 6 or 7 pounds before I stopped and got on a program. Once I reach my new goal, I'm hoping to see the warning signs sooner and stop myself before I gain even 5 pounds. And no more struggling on my own for so long; if it starts creeping up, I'm going straight back on program.