The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[aquarianskye]

Hiya T! Hope that this week is better than last. Maybe that mood has passed? I haven't taken a lot of time to check in over the weekend but I wanted to wish you a belated mother's day.

Going to go check in on some others. I hope you're having a good day.

[Tawanda]

Hi, I'm still here and still having a tough time. I'll pull out of it, it seems to be an annual thing with me. My birthday is in a couple days and then the anniversary of my father's death is soon, too. Last year was the same as this year even though I knew to watch for the downward spiral in my happiness meter . Knowing it is coming up and trying to twart it and actually being able to rise above the feelings of sadness and hopelessness just isn't as easy as it sounded like it would be (to me). So....I'll just tough it out, get through the next 2 weeks of annual dates, etc. and move on afterwards. I will probably be scarce until I can pull my mood back up, but then I'll be back. Weight has been right at 151, I doubt I'll get any weight off until I can change how I feel. This just sucks, next year I'm going to have to try to have a better plan in place instead of just thinking I can breeze through with trying to keep a positive attitude. I'm failing at positive.
Take care and see you in awhile.

[DogMa]

How long has it been, T? Not that long, I think? Those anniversaries were incredibly rough for me the first few years, but it really HAS gotten better (but it's been 16 years since my dad died and 14 since my mom died).

Hang in there, and I hope the clouds lift soon. (BTW, some nice long walks can also help. Gives you time to think.)

[Tawanda]

Robin, I am embarrassed to admit that it is 15 years - why it still gets me so down is beyond my understanding. The year he died, he was in the hospital on my birthday so I spent my birthday evening sitting beside his hospital bed. He died 10 days later at home. Our conversation on my birthday was a 'good-bye' conversation, telling me he was sorry that I was spending my birthday at a hospital, I told him it was fine---I just wanted to be with him. Anyway, my birthdays have been hard for me before he died for some reason---it isn't that I care about aging, it is something else and they just became worse the year that dad died.

Choices yesterday were bad. Hopefully I'm in a better frame of mind today and will care more about the long term repercussions of any decisions/choices I make today.

[DogMa]

Don't be embarrassed!!! I still have hard times like that, too - just more on certain holidays than on the actual anniversaries. And if it was already a hard day for you, then I understand it being even worse now.

But it's over (and btw, happy birthday!), so hopefully now things will settle down and you'll start feeling more chipper again.

[ChynnaDoll]

My prayers are with you Tawanda. I know FULL-WELL what you are going through...just wanted you to know i really feel your pain.

love,
Chynna

[aquarianskye]

Hey T, I'm sorry you're dealing with so much right now. I think that as women birthday's are always hard (well they are for me anyway).

You're in my thoughts and prayers girlie. Hope you feel better soon.

[lifelovinaries]

T, there is no need to be embarassed about such a sensitive situation. We all deal with things in our own time. Nothing will ever change the love you have for your father and nothing says that you will ever feel differently this time of year. Just through trial you will figure out the best way to pull yourself through. I wish you a happy birthday and i keep you in my prayers.

[KellyC]

Hi Tawanda.. I've been thinking of you chica..

There is no reason to be embarrassed that you still feel very touched by this anniversary. You feel what you feel for a reason... your dad must have been a very very special man to continue to influence you so greatly. A difficult time to be sure, but how wonderful that he is remembered so strongly and can still evoke such emotion!

Big hugs T.
You are a strong lady, I admire that so much in you.

[Tawanda]

[katieb920]

Hi my friend. Happy B-day.

I totally know what you are going through. My mom passed 10 years ago, and I still cry over it. Your only human T.

Anyways just wanted to pop in say Hello and hope you have a wonderful weekend.

[Lauren]

Morning, T.! Not sure if I'm wishing you a belated Happy Birthday or a proactive Happy Birthday, but just know I'm wishing you happiness!

Sorry this is a tough time for you, T. Do stuff that's kind to yourself, perhaps a massage or mani/pedi, or a long hot bath. Pamper yourself a bit, with things OTHER than food, which you know is not really pampering at all. I know that I personally love to go to movies alone, and find that to be very therapeutic alone time to just "BE." No one can have any expectations, the phone has to be off, the mind gets transported to a different place. I just find it really refuels me. I chug way too much diet soda, bring some veggies and my mf bar, and just have a couple hours of me time. Hey, it may work for you, just something to consider...

Anyway, thinking of you.

Lauren

[Diana]

Hey, beautiful!

I was just popping by. . .and read a bit.

My family has a saying -- "Somethings never get easy; they just get hard less often."

Hugs to you, my dear. And Kleenex. The grief that wells up is a testimony to the love you carry for him. May that love never fade.

[DogMa]

BTW, if you tend to bottle up your emotions (and I don't know that you do) ... might I suggest locking yourself in a room with a box of tissues and a really good tearjerker of a movie? A couple of hours of full-on grief and wallowing usually helps me, rather than just trying to act like everything's OK.

[Tawanda]

Hello! I'm here (big deal, I know ). I'm still a few pounds over goal but continue to work on seeing 147 on the scale again SOON! Finding the right combination of calorie burning (moving more and exercising some) with calorie intake is just as difficult as I expected. I need to learn to do it though and will continue to plug away at chipping the extra weight off as I screw up.

I am coming up on the anniversary of dad's death but am spending enough time working through the emotions (some times with food, other times with just feeling the sadness) that I seem to be dealing with it better. I will be thankful to hit the end of the month and have all the 'anniversaries' over (still to experience the anniversary of his death and the funeral).

So..........life here has been busy with babysitting, spring cleaning and outside work. I do read at least once a day, so even though I'm not interacting much, you guys are all in my thoughts.