The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Karli]

Wow, Tawanda. I really appreciate your post here. It is always a pleasure and so very helpful when a person opens up and decides to be human about this all. A lot of what you said really helped me.

You are doing really, really well. Keep it up, you are going to get there and you will have a whole new adventure !

Cheers,
Karli

[Serendipity]

T,

I used to have the following in my signature: "Comfort food is an oxymoron". Your post could have been my post. But a funny thing happened on my road to thindome. Life happened.......and I didn't eat about it. Each time I resisted using food as comfort, I became stronger. At some point along the way, it hit me that I was dealing with life sans food! What a revelation that was. As time goes on, you will see that you just don't need food to cope. In fact, the food makes things worse because self hatred creeps into every situation.

One of the reasons I was frightened to "finish" and go on transition and maintenance, was that I was so afraid that the old way of thinking would come back. The miracle, so far, is that I haven't turned to food. My relationship with food is still healthy.

Journaling has been such a big help for me. You are doing all the right things, T. Just think, you'll be playing on the floor in no time! One thing I can promise, the time goes fast. You'll stop and think and have to pinch yourself to make sure, but you will be thin in no time!

[Tawanda]

Hi,

Thanks Lizabette, Karli & Jo for your input. I was wondering how I would feel about posting my thoughts last night, but I'm still fine with it and now, with your feedback, I feel even a bit better about doing it.

The scale showed another .5# drop so I'm .5 away from being able to claim 20# gone. I love having the scale show a drop into the next 10# area. It was wonderful not seeing the 200s show up any longer and I will be very ready to say g'bye to the 190s when it finally happens.

I am starting out the day 'right' and had my first supplement 70 minutes after getting out of bed (a big deal for me). I'm usually up for closer to 2 hours before having a supplement, but I'm making a more consciencous effort to get closer (or within--imagine that! ) that 60 minute rule.

I've got a busy morning but wanted to pop in to read what everyone's been posting and to update my journal.

Make it a good day......make it a compliant MF day.......we deserve it.

[bikipatra]

Congrats on trying to get closer to that 60 minute rule. Before I was told about it, I would drink water and coffee for 2-3 hours before I had a supplement because I just wasn't hungry and also it was 3 in the morning!

[KeleeGrl]

Towanda...just getting caught up from the weekend. I really enjoyed reading your post and have felt and feel alot about what you wrote. I just don't know how to put it on paper...you definitely do..thanks!

You are doing great and I look forward to losing right along beside ya!

[DonicaB]

Tawanda~ I'm finally getting caught up on some of the journals. I'm sorry things had been moving a little slow......I hate turtle speed weight loss......I want warp speed weight loss.

You've done a great job soldiering on. You'll hit that 20# club in no time.

DonicaB

[SuzyQ66]

Tawanda - thanks for sharing your journey. I always thought food was my friend and did realize that it really wasn't. When you realize how wrong you truly are - it's like a mourning process starts. That happened to me about 3 weeks into the program. But I have never looked back. It does get easier...I am amazed at how easier it actually gets. I too do not want to waiver from the program because I am too afraid I won't be able to return. Congrats on your weight loss.

[Tawanda]

Thank you for your replies. It is always a bit uncomfortable for me when I share deeper thoughts. I appreciate the input and feedback.

Scale showed another .5# loss, which was a nice boost to my morning.

I find myself baffled and a bit bothered/hurt by something written on the forum recently and want to step back a bit and mull over if this was something aimed at me or if it was just a blanket statement. Sometimes, okay, too often, I allow myself to take ownership of things I have no right or need to take ownership of.....need to work on that personality flaw some more and it needs some mulling over today.

I wrote a long note but lost it to the Invalid Session gremlin.....I'd better hit submit now or lose this shorter version, too.

Hope it is a compliant and nice day for everyone.

[KeleeGrl]

Towanda..I'm sorry your feeling that way. I don't think you should take anything personal on here...I sometimes would and figured out that people were just making a statement and trying to help and maybe came across that way.

I see you are in the 20# club...WooHoo!...that needs to be changed! Unca, Mike....anyone? Way to go!

[Lizabette]

I wrote a long note but lost it to the Invalid Session gremlin.....I'd better hit submit now or lose this shorter version, too.

MISS T- Yours is the first post for me this morning.
Yep, this has happened to me, too., especially when I think what I have written is very, shall we say, inspiring and uplifting.
If that happens I drop with a thud, and mind goes blank, uh, uh, what did I say?
Okay, here's how to whip that . When you are writing and taking your time, do this:
1. SELECT your post (highlight it)
2.COPY it
3. Do it again, if necessary as you write more.
Then, if/when the gremlin stikes, start another post and PASTE it to your new post.
What you write is too valuable to somebody (me) to lose.

I find myself baffled and a bit bothered/hurt by something written on the forum recently and want to step back a bit and mull over if this was something aimed at me or if it was just a blanket statement. icon_confused.gif Sometimes, okay, too often, I allow myself to take ownership of things I have no right or need to take ownership of.....need to work on that personality flaw some more and it needs some mulling over today.

Baby, don't let something like this spoil your day. Quit mulling it, now!
I long ago adopted a concept that if I show love and caring for others, I simply ASSUME that they feel the same way about me.
Being in the spotlight (glass house) during our looooooong ministry, that concept saved me from a lot of hurt feelings and disappointments.
Kick behind you and think no more of it!

Well, I made sure I followed my own advice so I wouldn't lose this.
Gotta help DH finish our taxes this morning so I might be off the forum for awhile today.

[goodtaste1]

Dear Tawanda,

I've been away from reading all of the journals and entries of late and came across yours this morning. I absolutely LOVE the courage, intelligence, and honesty you share through your posts. I cannot tell you how I can relate to so much of what you are saying.

Burger King? LOVE it. Ice Cream Sandwiches? OH yes. I was in a habit of buying 3 doughnuts everytime I went to the grocery store and would wolf them down by the time I was 1/2 way home. (With a Diet Coke, of course). That was really special. Then I'd have sugar and doughnut crumbs all over myself and my car seat. I've mixed brownie batter and never baked the brownies because I enjoyed the batter too much.

I'm struggling to figure out what it is that is causing me to eat. I am the happiest that I've ever been yet I'm the heaviest I've ever been. Of course, I'm finally on the program and turning things around so I guess that is a good sign.

Anyway, this is your journal, not mine. But I wanted to thank you again for your words. They are more encouraging and supportive than you know.

Congrats on 20!!! I cannot WAIT to join you in that club.

[DonicaB]

Tawanda~ I agree with Lizabette.....quit mulling it now. I haven't read anything written by you that could ever be construed as negative or hurtful.

I do understand, however, as I had something similar happen to me the last time I was on the forum back in 2005. Someone wrote something that I thought was a little nasty directed at me. I find that this time around....I am very careful about what I say....I guess I am somewhat guarded in my responses. I want to be honest......but find myself holding back at times....because I don't want anything I say to be misunderstood.

I guess I need to take Kelee's advice as well.

DonicaB

[Tawanda]

I decided to take your advice and grow a thicker skin. Should have done it years and years ago.

[SuzyQ66]

[nickieluv]

Tawanda;

I don't know what you were mulling over, but I understand the feelings that you were going through. I just try my best to post as honestly as I can, and if someone takes issue, it's not my fault then. Sometimes people are just in a bad mood and need to get some things off their chests, but it gets aimed at the wrong person. It's hard to learn, and I'm still working on it, but if my motives were blameless then I can feel badly that someone's feelings were hurt, but I do not have to take ownership of their pain or feel that I was the cause. Everyone has a filter they read through, and tone of voice/intent is almost impossible to convey online.

As to your post the other day - I only just read it. And I know there are many people here who could have written the same exact things. I can relate to your stories of eating past the point of human endurance. And I wish I'd read your post before I had my cheating episode - although with my issues, there's no guarantee it would have stopped me, but it would have been good for me to read it.

Even though you said you were sick of self-help books, I wanted to ask if you had read anything by Geneen Roth. She has three books, and they were written in the 80s I think, but I just came across them in a library search and they were quick reads, and gave me some insights. She does talk about an eating plan but I just ignored that stuff - but her narratives about emotional and compulsive eating were really good reading and I got a lot from the books. I read "When Food Is Love" and "Breaking Free From Complusive Eating." I'm pretty sure those were the titles, but I'm completely sure about her name if you wanted to check them out.

Keep posting. It's important for us to share our revelations because you never know who you might touch. Maybe someone was just browsing the site and read your post and decided to order - or if not do MF, do something about their life. We were all brought here for some reason.