The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[jentuke]

I think the toughest hurdles I've faced so far are the sceptics and the eaters. How does everyone deal with the naysayers? I'm talking about the people that won't openly say bad things, but blithely ask "so how is the liquid diet going". I have never called it a liquid diet...why would anyone say that? It seems like they back-handedly just want to dismiss it. Why can't people just be excited/happy that we are actually finding success?

My other problem is at home eating. I'm staying on program, but it seems in response, my boyfriend is eating twice as much food for dinner. And everyone around me is asking if I want a bite of this or that.

How do you politely let everyone know how serious you are and train them not to try to sabotage you???

--jen

[martha]

Hey..I am sorry you are facing this kind of problem..You must be doing the complete fast..I do the 5 and 1 L&green that way if I am eating out with family or friends I don't have to hear anything about it..and at supper time it looks like I am eating what they are..People say things without even thinking nowadays..Don't take it personally..if like me, and you have been on 1 program after another they are probable checking to see if you are still on it(sorry but it happens )They are probably unhappy in some points of their lives and it easier to point the conversation on you then on themselves..
As for eating at home --Just tell them no thanks--I am serious about this program and am not willing to sabotage it for 1 bite or taste..I will wait till later when it is on my program.. hold your head up and stick to your guns--than when they gain from over eating and you have lost --you can show them the MF way works and tell them how to get started Sorry my evil twin just came out again..Have a great week and keep up the good work.. Martha

[jentuke]

Thanks Martha!
I am doing the 5/1 plan and when telling people about it, I mention the broad range of foods I get to eat. Maybe if I keep preaching the wonders of MF, they'll hop on board too.

[Jan]

Hi Jen

What I think is a great way to keep those people quiet who are rather snide and give you snide remarks is to simply say.
" I want to live a long and healthy life. Part of that is making sure I part with my extra weight. I'm really happy I've found a medically sound program to help me." They really can't argue with that. Don't argue.
Now they have a choice -- they can continue to be snide and let you know in affect that they don't give a darn what happens to you. Most people won't do this.
They can be quiet and say nothing -- that's ok --or they can be happy that you're making good changes for you. In any event it usually helps the situation.
Don't worry as they see the pounds coming off many of these people will be less skeptical. In fact, some will become believers.
Now for those who offer "bites and tastes" Nancy says" You don't have to taste that -- you know what it tastes like -- you've had it before and you
can have some again once you are at goal."
Some people like to "test" us to see if we are really commited. Sometimes they don't really even know that they are doing this --sometimes they do -- and remember change is a scary thing for many people. You are making changes . Some individuals may feel threatened. They will soon discover that you are just making a change in you -- a healthy change -- you will still feel the same about them.

jan

[mytime]

Jen - I am just mean in general but here it goes. If my son asks me to take a bite I say I am full. If someone else had the nerve to I would look them straight in the eye and say "Are you kidding me ?" smfd zi eould say it very pointedly. My husband oohs and ahs when we get take out for he and our kids - I told him to give me a break - oh - I am sorry it is really just average - You bet you as* it is

I for the first time have told very few people I am dieting b/c I don't want to deal with the liquid diet rebound junk. When I do explain the program I simply say I have 5 supplements a day and one salad with chicken and leave it at that. So far it has worked fine.

About your BF he might be eating more out of anxiety about his own weight or your weightloss or honestly it might just seem like a lot b/c well we are not eating a lot anymore ?

You are really doing great and sometimes I think managing people is the biggest challenge of MF ! Keep up the great work !!!!! Mytime

[i'm a loser]

I have the same problem with my husband...he had pizza, chinese and ice cream twice yesterday! I cannot believe how much more he is eating now that I am not!

[Nancy]

I've noticed that I notice what others are eating now that food is not the center of my universe.

Ask the naysayers whatever gave them the idea that Apple Cinnamon oatmeal, Chicken With Wild Rice soup, grilled salmon, broccoli, shrimp skewers, Romaine with tuhmater and cucumber salad, chocolate pudding, or Lemon bars are a Liquid Diet?

I am not on a DIEt. I am eating healthy nutritionally balanced foods following a medical protocol to improve my arterial and heart health...

[aimalasplace]

I have a question- if you go out with family/friends/self. How do you order? Are the servers generally receptive to special orders. I have never ordered meals with "Nothing added/special requests"
Do you find that they serve what you requested? Or do you end up with surprises?
I think I would probably stay home when invited out at least for the first month or so ( I don't get invited out that often anyway)
Thanks

[Nancy]

Aimeé ~


Servers are there to serve and their tip depends upon making the customer I have always found people to be very good about accommodating my requests. I ask kindly and graciously and I get what I want.

It depends upon if I am with family/friends, etc. that know I am on a weight management program or not. At this point in my life and weight history, everyone knows what I do but before I reached my goal and was on the weight loss phase, I did not want most people to know what I was doing because I did not want hassles, did not want to explain anything and did not want them watching my waistline because of all my past failures…

If it is dinner time, as I walk to my table, I scope out what others re eating along the way – I try to check out salads – do they have cheese and bacon all over them? I look over the menu and see if there is a ‘senior’ menu (that has smaller portions for a smaller price) or if lunch portions are still available. Red Lobster has lunch portions available in the evening. When the server arrives, I tell them, “You know, I’ve got a small appetite today and I want a lunch-size portion of the grilled salmon with a garden salad. In place of the baked potato/fries I’d prefer to have steamed vegetables.” When they inquire about the salad dressing, I ask for Vinegar and oil. If you suspect cheese is on the salad you’ve got a decision to make here…you can ask the server to bring you a plain garden salad without the cheese ‘n bacon or just plan on moving it around when it arrives and not make a big hairy deal out of it. Occasionally I ask for Ranch Dressing on the side - that way I can control the amount of dressing that I use. Usually I use just a tiny bit of it and no one is the wiser.

Rather than focusing on what I CANNOT HAVE or on what I am NOT eating – I focus on what is good for me and on the friendship and people relationships.

If it is a full size portion of steak/fish/chicken then have it boxed before you dig in. Share a meal with your friend – go halvsies with them and let them eat the French fries!

We ate out last evening with a group of people in our industry at a Tai restaurant. My husband is Mr. Bland. He has diverticulitis and cannot deal with anything spicy or hot…I saw one option for him – grilled steak and he chose to order seafood fried rice…he is still dealing with THAT…

Some ordered and ate family style sharing 8 entrees and two hors d’ouvres – deep fried wrappers stuffed with crab and cream cheese and something else deep-fried.

I selected Grilled Ginger Halibut. It came with 1 cup of grilled green peppers, onions, lemongrass, fresh ginger and basil and a plate of jasmine rice. The portion of halibut was very small – approx. 4 ounces and oily. I ate about ½ - 2/3 cup of the rice and all the halibut and vegetables. I made a decent choice for maintenance but for people on weight loss, no rice!

The others had Pad Tai rice noodles, curries, seafood dishes with raisins and cashews, oily sauces, mangos and other things with duck, lots of rice…

Mexican restaurants can be challenging with the rice, beans, tortillas, guacamole, sour cream and cheeses. If I go, I usually have a chicken fajita salad no tortillas or cheese, etc.

Sometimes I meet friends after supper for coffee and tell them I already ate (drank). It works.

[jentuke]

Thanks for everyone's input.

Regarding the ordering at restaurants...

I find the toughest task is finding decent places to eat, that serve a good selection of healthy items. However, salad is almost always available. I find if you talk with the server about salad dressings and other things, they will help you with offering healthy alternatives. I think restaurants are becoming more and more accomodating. Just don't be afraid to ask about different options, even if you don't see the exact thing on the menu.

[martha]

Hi--

We never have had a problem with eating out and special ordering..Like Nancy said they are there to serve you..We ate out every night on vacation (10 days) and never had a problem.. I am like Nancy..I look at everyone elses plates as I am walking and as I am sitting and have asked the waiter what something on someone elses plate was before.. how else would I know??I also look for seniors plates..as they are a better size and if we are not going stright home we don't ahve to worry about the leftovers spoiling..A lot of the time Doug and I share a plate and get an extra salad..Cheaper adn it works out really well as they put to much food for 1 person on most plates now.. If they have the gall to surprise you with something you didn't want --SEND IT BACK!!!--Hope it helps..Martha