by Lisa Renee » August 1st, 2005, 11:59 pm
At the risk of sounding cheesy, tonight I sat down and really thought about my life. I never really realized how important some things had become. Things that should not have been top priority have somehow become my only priority. Saying goodbye to the ones that hurt me is not easy. Tonight I did the hardest thing I have ever done when it comes to food. I said goodbye to my longtime friends. The friends that comforted me when I cried and cheered me up when I felt I couldn't make it through the day. The friends that made me feel like I could do anything and that tomorrow would be different and that life had some hope. But when the morning came, I was left with the cold hard truth of another day passed that I had spent not living. My friends lied to me. They comforted me but when I wasn't looking, they stole my social life. When I wasn't paying attention, they tore down all of my personal successes and I was left with, without my health. I was left as a hermit, a prisoner in my own home. Afraid to even get the mail or go to the grocery store. I allowed these friends to charm their way into my life and make me think I couldn't live without them and in return I shut down my whole world for them and hid myself out of shame. I allowed my friends to become my only source of happiness. My friends, they had names...Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup, Chicken in an Bisket, Cheesecake, and don't forget Soda Pop. Oh they weren't the only ones, there was that sassy Pepperoni and those persistant tall Breadsticks all puffed up, drenched in butter, and looking like a million bucks. They all had a place in my life. Food became my 'human' companion'. I let them come live in my house with me. I had a whole room set up with a tv just in their honor. This became my artificial life. I was so true to my friends, including them in any fun activity because it wouldn't seem the same without them...or so I thought. I had to have them with me or life wasn't as tasteful, colorful, or even bearable....In real life, when we make friends and bring them into our lives, we make them important and in return we feel a sense of family and or of companionship. When a friend hurts us or tries to steal from us, why would we allow them to live in our home and stay at our side? What a fool I have been. I gave my life to poor food choices for over 20 years. It's time to say goodbye. Tomorrow is a new day, a new beginning, and my friends are no more. I can't tell you how many of my friends took their final journey down the garbage disposal this evening. It's time for a revival in every sense of the word. A Medifast revival!!! A revival of health and of spirit and of truth. Truth to your own self. Truth about where you have been and what choices you made and truth about the fact that you can't fool anyone, not even yourself. But also in this I have found truth: I AM A STRONG WOMAN who is capable of being true to myself and to honor the path set before me with a positive attitude and with a new sense of who I am and just what I am capable of. I CAN DO THIS.
Goodbye old friends, I am sure I will see you around, but you will no longer run my life. I RUN MY LIFE NOW. ........and it's about time
Last edited by
Lisa Renee on August 2nd, 2005, 12:29 am, edited 3 times in total.