Rodeomom

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Postby BabyTrace » February 17th, 2008, 7:11 am

Hi Brenda!

Just stopping by to say hello to an old friend now that I am rejoining the fold. Glad to see you still around.

Hey I just noticed that you are just a smidge from your half way point. Way to go girl!

Tracy
Start Date: 07/11/2007

The essence of growth is a willingness to change for the better and then an unremitting willingness to shoulder whatever responsibility this entails.
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Postby katieb920 » February 17th, 2008, 8:37 am

Hey brenda hoping you are having a blast in Pa. Wondering if you are drinking some warm MF hot chocolate next to the fireplace.

I love ski resorts. It is so pretty looking at the mountains with all the white snow.
Katie
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Postby aquarianskye » February 18th, 2008, 9:51 am

Hey girlie-are you back yet? Did you have fun? I miss you. come out come out where ever you are!

Kids are out of school today so I'm searching for FUN things to do with them. May just find a park when screaming meme gets up from her nap.

Miss ya sis.
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Postby ChynnaDoll » February 18th, 2008, 2:15 pm

Heyyyyyyy Bren! hope you're having the time of your life whatever yer doing :-P Just dropped by to say hello to'ya!

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Postby katesmom » February 18th, 2008, 4:50 pm

Hey Brenda,
Hope you had an awesome time on your trip !

Just wanted to say hello !!!!
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Started 7/24/10
Can't wait to WIN this race !!
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Postby katesmom » February 19th, 2008, 9:34 am

Oh Brenda????
Where are you?????

Don't back out now !

We are watching !!!

Compliant or not, please come back and say hello ! :hug:
356/331/150
Started 7/24/10
Can't wait to WIN this race !!
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Postby rodeomom » February 19th, 2008, 10:15 am

Hey guys -

The trip was great until I got home. I got caught up in it all and basically binged the whole weekend. I feel totally awful, physically and emotionally. Then as I am sitting in the living room with my dad he brings up the $800 I supposedly owe him. Long story, but in his mind I owe it to him and if I can't give it to him by the end of the month I have to get out. What the @#$#% am I going to do? He never mentioned this before the trip, when I actually had some money to give him. I just can't keep living like this, but what am I supposed to do? I have to get out, but I am stuck in so many ways. I am tempted to just jump in my car and live out of it for a while - it has to be better than living with him. My daughter is safe - he won't kick her out. If I am the dead beat he says I am than she is better off without me anyway.

Anyway - thanks for looking for me. I am here, just not really in the mood to do much of anything right now.
09/21/07 - 12/21/07 Lost 80 Pounds Ankle Surgery 12-21-07
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Postby katesmom » February 19th, 2008, 10:29 am

Hey Brenda,
It sounds as if your Dad is resentful that you went away, and took you and your daughter for a much needed REST !!!!

We can't control people at all, but we can control what is acceptable and not acceptable... especially when it comes to our self-respect.

What is your Mom's take on this?

Hang in there, don't worry about the PAST (the binging this past weekend), put one foor in front of the other, and take it one moment at a time...
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Started 7/24/10
Can't wait to WIN this race !!
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Postby MerryMary » February 19th, 2008, 4:19 pm

rodeomom wrote:Hey guys -

The trip was great until I got home. I got caught up in it all and basically binged the whole weekend. I feel totally awful, physically and emotionally. Then as I am sitting in the living room with my dad he brings up the $800 I supposedly owe him. Long story, but in his mind I owe it to him and if I can't give it to him by the end of the month I have to get out. What the @#$#% am I going to do? He never mentioned this before the trip, when I actually had some money to give him. I just can't keep living like this, but what am I supposed to do? I have to get out, but I am stuck in so many ways. I am tempted to just jump in my car and live out of it for a while - it has to be better than living with him. My daughter is safe - he won't kick her out. If I am the dead beat he says I am than she is better off without me anyway.

Anyway - thanks for looking for me. I am here, just not really in the mood to do much of anything right now.


Brenda, sorry you had such a horrible homecoming! I'm picking up the phone to call you as soon as I locate your number. :(
MARY
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Postby rodeomom » February 19th, 2008, 4:38 pm

Thanks Mary and sorry I missed you, I sent you a PM.
I feel a little better now. I have spent today in prayer and reading the Word. I know that through all of this, God has a plan. He never likes to reveal His plans to me right away (I think He is trying to teach me patience), but I know that He will never allow anything to happen to me that I cannot handle (with His help).

The ironic thing is that I really want to move out. My father makes life here so miserable, that I just hate to think of staying here any longer. I just don't have any other options right now. I can't even walk to pack my car. If I could I think I would be on another road trip to God knows where. This time just Tucker (my dog) and me.


Anyway, I have managed to get back on plan today. I have drank all my required water and have had 2 shakes, a bar and my L&G. I even did my exercise routine. I remembered that all of my spring/summer clothes from last year are WAY too big and all of the new stuff I bought is still too small. SO - for my trip to San Antonio I either have to gain everything back Which NOT going to happen or I have to lose enough to fit into those 16's. Besides, I am still out to win that money in the contest - I need it now more than ever! :?
09/21/07 - 12/21/07 Lost 80 Pounds Ankle Surgery 12-21-07
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Postby rodeomom » February 20th, 2008, 11:51 am

Ok, day 2 of being back on plan since my horrible binge over the weekend. I am working on flushing my system of all that crap I downed while in PA so I doubled up on water (a real challenge for me) and reduced my Diet Coke intake (an even BIGGER challenge for me). I have been more strict with myself about snacks and have even cut out peanut butter (NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME). Not sure how long I will be able to go without the peanut butter, but I will do what I can.

I have also been dillegent (sp) about doing my crunches, upper body work out and leg lifts for my hip and thigh area. What stinks is that I had just gotten to a point where I could do my routine without getting sore, now I feel like I am starting all over again. I am OK with that though since I feel like I should have consequences for not following my plan.

Tomorrow is a big day for me. I go into the doctor at 10:15am and HOPEFULLY get my cast off. I will actually be able to take a REAL shower and soak in a REAL bath. Not to mention I will be able to start the process of walking again. I already schedualed a physical therapy appointment for Friday. Once I get back into that routine, I will be riding the stationary bike for my ankle, but also getting in the cardio that I have been missing since my surgery. WOO HOO. Watch out everyone, I am back on track and sooo going to win the contest. That money is MINE, I can feel it!
09/21/07 - 12/21/07 Lost 80 Pounds Ankle Surgery 12-21-07
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Postby rodeomom » February 21st, 2008, 2:03 pm

YEEE HAW!! I got my cast off FINALLY!! I have to wear a walking boot, but at least I can take it off to take a shower or a nice soak in the tub and for sleeping. I am soooo happy. Now I can't wait to weigh myself in the morning to see my true weight.

Watch out Loser contestants -- nothing can stop me now!
09/21/07 - 12/21/07 Lost 80 Pounds Ankle Surgery 12-21-07
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Postby Lauren » February 21st, 2008, 3:14 pm

Ooh, Brenda, that is so awesome! Congrats! I completely know what you mean about finally being able to shower/sleep normally, I had the same issues post-surgery. The whole thing kind of made you appreciate the little things in life, huh? :-)

Be super careful and enjoy the heck out of your new-found mobility!

Lauren
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Postby rodeomom » February 21st, 2008, 5:42 pm

Thanks Lauren! Just to be able to shave that leg was incredible (8 weeks of not shaving - let me tell ya, it was pretty bad!!!) First thing I did when I got home was rip off the walking boot and soak in the tub. It felt WONDERFUL!! Then, just because I could I took a shower this evening!! I finally feel competely CLEAN!!!!

I already have my first physical therapy (PT) appt made for tomorrow at 5pm. I know these guys and while they are kind and gentle, they are also relentless so I know I will be working my butt off (literally, I hope) with them getting my ankle back in working condition. I actually can NOT wait to get on the bike and start getting some good old cardio workouts in. Technically, the bike is for the range of motion on my ankle, but the cardio is a nice side effect of it. Now, I will be in the gym (SUPERVISED by my physical therapists) 3 days a week.

OH, and BELIEVE YOU ME!!! I will be SUPER DUPER careful! 2 major reconstructive surgeries on the same ankle is enough for me in this lifetime!
09/21/07 - 12/21/07 Lost 80 Pounds Ankle Surgery 12-21-07
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Postby queenielou » February 21st, 2008, 9:57 pm

Hey Brenda,

Yay for having the cast off! I'm glad to read that your outlook has improved about your situation. All things will be revealed in time and you will know why you are going through this now. Since I've seen you weather this storm before, I know you will make it through this time. Sounds like you have some good workouts ahead of you. Keep up the hard work :)
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