The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Landylue]

I have really been ‘bummed out’ since last Friday, and thought that putting my feelings down on paper might help. No need for anyone to reply—or even to read this, for that matter--I just need to vent. In fact, I would like to pick up the closest silver chaffing dish and sail it through a plate glass window!

Last Friday I had to attend my THIRD ‘buffet event’ within the last four weeks. This was a retirement for a very well-liked, high-ranking individual within the company, so not only did I HAVE to attend, but I truly wanted to, as well, out of respect for this person. This buffet, however, turned out to be the ‘mother of all buffets’ with the most obscene amount of incredible food piled high everywhere you looked. I won’t go into the details, but this food orgy drug on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on.

No more! I’ve absolutely had it with standing around with my little cup of ice water or Diet Coke watching everyone in the room (3/4 of them overweight, also) stuffing food into their mouths!

Did I fall off the program? Of course not, but I was ‘seething’ on the way home! I have never felt so deprived in all my life! And it was my own fault! I refuse to attend one more of these stupid functions before I reach my goal. I am going to respect MYSELF enough not to force myself to endure another one of these get-togethers because attending is the politically right thing to do, or because I’m just too much of a ‘wuss’ to JUST SAY NO!

HOW DARE I DO THAT TO MYSELF!!!

Saturday I went to a church function and sat across from a lady who had stomach banding surgery three weeks ago to enable her to lose weight. She was sitting there eating canned nacho cheese! HELLLLLLOOOOOOOO!!! Why didn’t she just sit there and suck on a stick of butter?!? I had to hold my tongue to keep from asking her what in the world was she doing to herself! I want to be supportive, but, hey, give me something to work with here, lady!

Sunday I had to go buy dozens of special-order pastries for a meeting first thing Monday morning. The smell of yeast bread and cinnamon was overwhelming! The left over pastries are now sitting in my office not eight feet from me. I tried to get the COO to let me take them somewhere else, but they wanted them right where they are. I hate to sound paranoid, but maybe I need to read ‘Who’s Sabotaging Your Diet?’ one more time.

Yesterday, I spent hours working in our garden filled with young plants which will produce beautiful veggies which I won’t be able to eat because I’ll still be on this program when they are ready to be picked. Our fig bush is LOADED with green figs! I guess they’ll be out there next year, though.

Today I was asked to help plan the office picnic. Can you believe it! I just now told them no! I actually told them NO!!! And it felt darn good!!! In fact, not only did I tell them no, but that I wouldn’t be attending either. Good for me! I think I am growing! Protect yourself, Landylue, no one else will! And, there’s always next year.

In May I’ll go see my daughter graduate from seminary, and then on to a beautiful Christian camp in the mountains that has a marvelous chef. I’ll be there for well over a week, and still be on the program. This is not any fun, guys! And I feel pathetically sorry for myself. I want it to be over. I want to reach my goal and I want it to be over.

And then I read Mike’s post and realize that it won’t ever be over, just not as severe.

This program is working, though, folks.

Failure is not an option.

I will not fall.

Landylue

[Carrie]

Hiya Landy,

Girl, I totally understand. As a matter of fact Tami and I have been talking about just this kind of stuff.

Most of the time I can re-think my attitude of 'not eating=deprivation'. I truly do realize that I'm not doing myself any favors by eating. BUT for YEARS AND YEARS eating has been my comfort, my consolation prize, my 'make me feel good' drug. And every once in awhile I feel like a toddler throwing a tantrum because the voice inside my head is screaming 'I want food and I want it NOW! Give it to me!'

Last night I got out my take out menus about 5 times. I'd get em out and look em over and decide what to order. Then I'd talk myself out of it. Then half hour later I'd get em out again. I finally put them away and do you know what? I was MAD that I didn't eat. Mad at myself for not eating. You'd think it would have been an accomplishment to say no ....... but NO ole Carrie winds up mad at herself for not eating. Does that make ANY sense at all??? Nope.

All I can say is, I know this is tough, I know this is torture sometimes. But the food will all be there waiting for you when you reach your goal. And you are doing this to try and take care of yourself. Taking care of yourself does not mean eating unadulteratedly right now, it means following your program.

I know this sounds goofy, but I try and adopt a self-righteous attitude when in the 'buffet' situation. I watch the overweight people gorging themselves and think to myself 'I am not going to abuse myself like that'. Sometimes it helps.

Anyway, for what it's worth, a bunch of us girls are struggling right now, and trust me when I say, we'll have to stick together to get through it. Try and remember that the difficult times will pass and hang on to your sanity till they do.

Carrie

[elle4nelly]

Landylue,

I probably shouldn't reply since I have nothing constructive to say in order to help you. In fact, You echoed all my sentiments!!!!!!!!!!
I am borrrrrrrrrrrrreddddddddddd senseless, sick of shakes and jello and I DON'T WANT TO QUIT...I JUST WANT TO GET TO THE FINISH LINE NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!
RIGHT BLOODY NOWWWWWWWW!!!

I feel like people around me are out there enjoying delicious low fat meals and wining and all....and oh yeah...i'm sipping shakes and eating jello... i thought about giving myself a brak...but I know myself...this was meant to be the last straw!! so if I come off...it will be a permanent walk to the other side..never to be seen on medifast again...Oh..I even have thought lately of food diets I can go on...but frankly..nothing will make you lose as fast as medifast..so here I am....

sorry I couldn't help you with some smart answers...I'm in your boat, little do you know!

Nelly

[Landylue]

Hi, Carrie. You said, “And every once in awhile I feel like a toddler throwing a tantrum because the voice inside my head is screaming 'I want food and I want it NOW! Give it to me!'” Inside, I feel exactly like a kid throwing a tantrum. I have that much anger and frustration over something like FOOD--or the lack of it. For goodness sakes! Is this just yet another sign of being addicted to food?

I was on the Internet yesterday reading all I could about addiction. I found a great article that advised that when the overwhelming urge to eat (drink, take drugs, smoke, etc.) hits, try closing your eyes, hold on, and breathe. As you breathe, try to FEEL the turmoil going on inside of you, hold on and breathe. Breathe, and know it’s OK to experience these dark feelings, hold on, and breathe. Breathe, and let the feeling know that you control it, not the other way around, and breathe. Breathe, and continue to do this type of self-examining/self-talk, and within a minute or two the urge to indulge your addiction will lift. I tried it last night and it works! In fact, I went through that exercise twice last night, and once this morning.

You are right, though. It is going to definitely take a mighty group effort to get us all through this battle. That’s why it’s so important to be there for each other.

Thank you for being my support today.

Landylue

[elle4nelly]

You're right agin landylue!

I need help with " patience".

I din't get fat overnight but now..I want to lose it all in 3 days and having a tantrum over why can't it all go away so I can have food like everyone else..blah blah blah...

yeah...it's a group effort and each of us need to work on their biggest food downfall and all..

HUGH....

utterly so over dieting lately....

Nelly

[Landylue]

But, Nelly, isn't it a tremendous positive that neither of us outrightly declared that we were, indeed, going to quit, or even that we wanted to quit. We both stated a strong desire to finish—albeit quickly—and then get on with our lives.

Like you, I know that if I listen to that soft crooning voice that begs me to eat just one brussel sprout—what’s it going to hurt—it’s not like you’re going to eat a piece of cake, you know—that I might as well throw everything I’ve worked for all these weeks right out the window. It would truly be one salty little brussel sprout, to start, then immediately, move on to something else, and something else, and then the cake.

I’ve GOT to do this program the right way. I’ve GOT to finish this race without falling. I’ve GOT to scrounge up every bit of fortitude I can within me to stay the course. It would absolutely devastate me to fail.

And failing is just not an option I have given myself.

Thanks for being there. You have no idea how much it helps.

Landylue

[Guest]

No ..Thank you!

Quitting isn't an option indeed!

Nelly

[trish]

I'm new here, and I was wondering what the numbers (3 of them) at the bottom of the page are. Also, where is Smalltown. I'm from Southlake,Tx and was really hoping there was some kind of support group where people met in person. I do better when I can talk to someone.

I know what you mean about functions with food. Some of my friends have called me to go out for lunch and I just tell them I can't.

One thing that does help me though is to put 1 tablespoon of Metamucil in 16 ounces of ice water and drink it before I go somewhere and it fills me up.

Trish

[Leigh]

Landylue,

It's really not funny, but I read your post here at work and laughed at loud. Primarily because they reward us with food here at work including donuts, pizza, pasta express, and I could go on and on and on about that.

They always ask me what I want for lunch, and I say, "Nothing, thanks." Then they have to ask "why?" and the next thing you know someone is saying, "It won't hurt to have a little." By then I usually feel like screaming. I guess it wouldn't hurt them if I had a little, but it would really hurt me.

I think the breathing idea sounds great. There are times when I really need it, and I'm going to try it.

Whether you realize it or not, your venting has really helped me. It helped me to laugh a little, and to realize I'm not as obsessed as I thought I was. The next time they come in here carting donuts around I'm going to think of that post, take a deep breath, and once again say "No thanks." (maybe this time with a smile)

You go girl!
Leigh

[explorthis]

I'm new here, and I was wondering what the numbers (3 of them) at the bottom of the page are.

was really hoping there was some kind of support group where people met in person. I do better when I can talk to someone

Trish.. Welcome.....

The numbers at the bottom are weight's and measures!!

Example: Landy's are: 208-181-135

This means she started her weight at 208, her current weight is 181 and her goal is 135. This helps us (and her) all see her progress.

You can add these and other comments in your "signature" area when you sign in under the profile section.

As for the support, trust me, chime in here, you will become a welcomed :member" in no time... No need for "actual sightings" this is the only place you need for support!!!

-Mike