The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Jeanette]

Hi everyone....lots of new names, and a few old faithfuls I recognize.

Remember as kids when we would play a ball game, and we would totally and completely mess up and miss the ball? We didn't want it to count against us, so we asked for a "do-over" and not count the mistake so we could do it again and get it right.

Well, fellow team members, I am asking all of you for a "do over".

What prompted this new "do-over"? I woke up feeling exactly how I felt before I started Medifast--bloated, achy, swollen, exhausted. I have been consistently waking up like this for the past couple of months, byut decided that if I didn't acknowledge it, it wasn't really happening. I hid my scale so I would not have to face the facts that I already knew--that I had gained some weight back.

This morning, when I woke up feeling the same sugar hang over that I have felt many mornings in my lifetime, I knew I was headed right back to where I started. I knew that if I didn't stop now, I would never stop, and would be right back to 340 lbs.

Nervously, I pulled my scale out from its hiding place, sat it in its usual spot on my bathroom floor, placed my left foot on, then my right foot, and watched as the number spun around. My stomach sank as I saw where the needle landed--287 pounds. I had gained back 22 lbs in the three month "hiatus" from the program. That is 13 lbs from having a 3 in the beginning of my weight, which I swore I would never ever have again.

Friends, I am SCARED TO DEATH to go back to 300 plus pounds. I am going to be single again in a month, and I know I cannot start life as a single woman weighing so much. I know there are men out there that probably would look beyond my size and see the woman within, but let's face it--our society is very superficial, and very much prejudiced against anyone overweight or obese.

I know I have asked for your help before...but I am asking again. I need you all--your strength, encourgement, your wisdom. I know I cannot do this alone, but I also know that you can't do this for me. I have to do it myself.

I have this plaque in my home with a message on it that I thought was rather trite, but today it has much more signifcance:

"Have the courage to begin again.
Be ready to overcome obstacles.
Stay open to change.
Be patient enough to know it takes time to start over.
Be wise enough to ask for help from family and friends.
Reflect on the past and remember the lessons to has taught.
Always remember to look to God for strength and guidance."

Thanks for listening. By the way, check out my new signature. It sort of explains what has happened and where I am now.

[Unca_Tim]

Hi Jeanette,
Do-Overs allowed here. Let's not look at the fact that you've lost a little footing here. You're 50 pounds lighter than when you started!

If you're not done beating yourself up yet, YOU ARE NOW!
There....i'll give you one last whack, now you can get back on track....

You know we're here for you, and always will be. Next time, give us a call if you need. Don't make us send Guido over there.

Now...get to shakin' young lady,

Unca

[Marseilles]

Jeanette..

First and foremost, WELCOME BACK! You are hereby granted the famous Do-Over and noone will hold you more accountable for your transgressions than you yourself have. Congratulations on recognizing the problem before you were Jeanette with a '3' once again.

The train to thinsville has stopped to let passengers back on..anyone else aboard??

I have noticed a familiar vein to many posts lately and Im not sure if it is the lazy days of summer, the heat, celebrations..or what; but we are struggling. A good number of us sound listless and weary..I suggest we ALL take a minute, grant ourselves a Do-Over and hop back on our journey to being thin and healthy.

I personally am with Jeanette. After struggling for about three weeks now (thankfully I have been blessed with maintaining my loss and not gaining, but STRUGGLING just the same) for a variety of reasons, one main one being the hairloss I had posted previously about; Ive come to a decision:

Maybe at 120lbs Ill look cute as a blonde with short hair instead of maintaining my current 160lbs and stressing the loss of my waist length auburn curls....a valid concern? I think so, yes. So valid as to have me lose sight of my goals and all that I have achieved thus far? Hair will grow back..which is more important? A very personal struggle that I had to come to terms with.

My point, fellow losers, is that we all have very individual and valid reasons each and EVERY time we screw up and we have very valid reasons each time we muster strength to get back on track and face our transgressions.

Each one of us is learning a new way of life in our medifast journey and each one of us will be a stronger, better, THINNER person for it.

Welcome home Jeanette..you will find no judgement here and it is SO good to see you back. We are here for you.

Welcome back to ALL who decide to get back on track today!

The DO-OVERS are being passed out, free of charge...want one?

-M.

[explorthis]

AMEN Jeanette! Do Overs are allowed. You have my 100% support!

Always here for you (and I mean this from the heart!)

-Mike

[Nancy]

Hey, Jeanette ~

Whew! I am so glad that you came clean.

'Do overs' are allowed.

Have you read my latest Newsletter? I mention the fact that my friend Everett quit smoking 16 times before he was successful. Hopefully, you will not need that many 'do overs' my Friend.

I love the quotation you gave from your plaque. We do need the strength of the Lord. He goes before us, behind us and beside us. He is our Way Maker.

Your MakeMeThinner Community of friends stands at the ready to encourage you and see you to your goal. Of course we stand by you. We will stand behind you, next to you and in front of you. If we could, we'd come over there and stand guard around you. Guido is out there, Jeanette. Be careful, be very careful! We love ya, Netty and we want you to get healthy.

Is today Day One?
Check in tomorrow and let us know how you are doing.

I was just looking at my calendar and saw where I had written your name in at the end of July. I was sad that your company changed their plans for your trip to the NW. I really wanted to meet you. We will just have to have another time to get together. Sometimes making an appointment or setting a date in advance for something special is a great motivator to keep people on the straight and narrow with their eating plan.

I asked my doctor for permission to come in for weight and blood pressure checks. That was a motivator for me. I also keep accoutnable by weighing every single day and I record my weight and BMI every single day.

I noticed that you put away your scale. I used to do that before Medifast. When I knew I was not eating the right things, I avoided the scales. I fooled no one. Not myself and certainly not others. For me and for many others, not weighing daily is a dangerous thing.

Plan your week.

Love ya to pieces.

[susan]

Hey Jeanette.
I am on a do -over also I have been about half on and half off for a little over a month now .but I can;t go back to taking diabetics medcine again and knees killing me so I am going for the other 40 pounds I don;t want to feel sluggish and couldn;t get off the couch without it hurting me so I will not go back to that way of living . so come on and lets do this together I know you can do this because you was doiing so wonderful . we all fall down but we can;t lay there we haft to get up and try again .I have been so at myself for cheating I would do ok till night and then I would cheat .but I am done with the cheating . Jeanette M ike stayed true to the program and now he reaps the benfits of it all .we can do this together Nancy has did this also and we are not alone in this .we have a wonderful family of friends here on the forum that will help us. I am so glad you are back .where is Ellen ? we all need each other .WE WILL SUCCEED TOGETHER WITH THE HELP WE GET HERE AND THE LORD WILL HELP US i AM LOOKING FORWARD TO A GOOD REPORT FROM YOU.
take care and hang in there.
susan

[MomJackieLee]

Jeanette -

Hugs and support, sweetie, you are going through a tough patch right now. Glad you have re-committed to yourself, for yourself. Best of luck!

[Carrie]

Well, I guess I'll take my seat right next to Jeanette. I was having problems staying on my program before I went on vacation, and I ate regular food 'within reason' while on my vacation. I promised myself I would immediately go back to the program when I got home. But so far I haven't made that happen. I have gained 2-5 pounds.

Like Susan, I restart every day and by the evening I find myself caving in to temptation. I seem to be rather ambivalent right now. I just can't get myself to care all that much about getting back on the stick. It reminds me very much of something Jeanette said awhile back about feeling like she was 'wandering around in the wilderness'.

I'm determined not to panic about it, and ride this out with the mindset that 'this too shall pass' and it'll get better soon.

Carrie

[LouLou]

I am so glad that I logged onto this board today. I, too, have been having alot of trouble getting back on track. Every day I say "Today, I begin my fast again." Every night I promise to start again tomorrow. I'm so mad at myself for it. Lucky for me, I haven't gained back any weight, but I don't understand what has happened to me. When I started back in March, my resolve was unshakable. You could wave french fries or pizza or whatever under my nose and I wasn't even tempted. Now, I can't even pour my kid a bowl of cereal without munching a handful.

I'd like a do-over too! Don't let the train pull out of the station without me. I'm climbing aboard now!!

[Unca_Tim]

Scooch over Carrie......Climb aboard LuLu,
Anyone else?
Unca

[Sylvia]

I'm squarely in the middle of the "boredome" phase right now coupled with being frustrated that the scale is not moving as quickly as I'd like despite my compliance with the program. To try to get refocused, I reread "Success in a Shaker Jar" this weekend and thought I would pass on something from it that Carrie's post made me think of.

The book first says that you should try to stay on the program until you reach your goal as that provides the highest likelihood of success. BUT, if you do stray (not just a day of cheating or a small nibble but a serious and consistent issue committing or recommitting to the program), she suggests that a planned break might be better than continuing to go on half on and half off. First, when you're half off, you are probably not getting the right nutritional balance that allows you to maintain ketosis and you may not be getting appropriate nutrition. Second (and I think more importantly), continuing to carry on unsuccessfully is not a good think to do emotionally and may damage your ability to succeed on the plan.

I am certainly not advocating that anyone go off the program and am no expert, but this really resonated with me. I've done what you described on other diets - did great all day and then blew it at night. I know that was one step before I lost hope, gave up and went back to my old ways. I can only speak for myself, but I think if you can't get back on track, a short, planned break might be a better, more controlled way of getting refocused than being half on and half off. The book even talked about someone who decided to lose 100 lbs in two phases. She lost 50 in the first phase, took off a year, maintained the initial weight loss, came back to the program and lost the second 50 pounds! That doesn't sound like something I want to do but it clearly works for some.

Just thought I'd throw this into the mix and would be interested in others' thoughts about it.

[Carrie]

Sylvia,
Thanks for the advice - it does seem to make sense - if you're spiraling downward to just stop - one way or another. I'm going to sit myself down tonight and give it some hard thought. My gut reaction is that 'No! I don't want to give up my program!' But obviously I'm not following my program anyway. There's something going on in my head where I can't get myself to care enough to follow through at the moment.

Perhaps I have to have some sort of compromise with myself, like the lady that lost 100lbs in 2 stages. Sometimes when I can't get myself to do something just because 'I said so', I can get myself to do it by way of bargaining, i.e. 'Ok, if you stay late at work and get this project done, you can treat yourself to a trip to the used book store.' I know it sounds stupid - but it works for me most of the time. It's like I'm parent and child all rolled into one.

Whatever I do, program break or no, I refuse to let my scale get back up to 230. No way no how NO.

Thanks for the food for thought, there's a solution here somewhere, I just gotta let it cook in my brain till it pops out (and not panic while I'm waiting).

Carrie

[Lois]

Hi Jeanette.

BIG hugs to you, girlfriend. We all love you and KNOW you can do this. Stick to the program and those pounds will disappear. I know you're going through SO much right now....but let's face it, food can't fix any of it....love, prayers, support and friendship are what you need, and you have it ALL right here.

HEAPS of love to you....

Lois

[Echo]

Hi Jeanette, I'm so glad you are back on the plan. With all that is happening in your life it is understandable that you fell back into some old habits, but you caught yourself before that 3 on the scale and hopefully things will settle down in your life so you can really focus on yourself again.

I read today that obstacles are opportunities in work clothes. It can be so hard sometimes, especially when we have a hiatus or vacation. But you did it before, and can again! Look at the differences between your original pictures and what came after. Like Unca said, you are still 50 lbs less than your starting weight!

We are all rooting for you, when you succeed we all succeed. And, I think I remember that you do some theater. I can imagine you in fabulous roles that you maybe wouldn't have tried for before losing weight. There is so much to look forward to.

[Nancy]

Getting back with the program is HARD.

IMHO, it is always best to go all the way to your goal before taking a side-trip.

When one is faced with a lot of weight to lose, it can feel like the end will never come. The task can seem too BIG. It looms above us larger than life and then there is that creepy snarly voice in our head that says, “Huh, uh. It’s way too big a job for YOU. Too big. You can’t do it. We ALL know that you can not do it.”Then if the lies of Negatory Norton are not enough to push us over the edge, Bore Dumb sets in.

Lemme tell ya, folks, BORE DUMB is a reality of life and yet, we do not allow boredom to make us stop being a Dad, or a Mom, or a friend.

Boredom with our salary is not a license to steal from others; it can become an impetus to work smarter or to get a different job.

Boredom with our mate is not a reason to dump her/him and go and get a new one when we have committed to be with them through thick ‘n thin (whew! Terry could have left me a LONG tome ago if our commitment to one another was to stick it out only during times of thinness and to take off during fatness!), but we committed to one another for a life-long term - for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, etc.

We go the distance because it is the right thing to do.

I suppose that some people DO need to take a break in their weight loss journey but I know that would not have worked for me. It would have been too easy for me to rationalize and to boing right back up the scale, up and over the two hundred and sixty-five pound mark and beyond.

It would have been “To infinity and be-yon-n-n-nd!” for me.

I am a foody. I was out of control. Food controlled me.

I took a stand, I took control and food is now merely my fuel. It makes the machinery run.

Linda Spangle writes an excellent explanation of the problem that occurs when we do a little Medifast here and also do a little (or a lot!) or our own thing with Medifast. We enter, what Linda describes as "No Man's Land."

Again, check out her book, Success in a Shaker Jar, pages 100-102.

I have a writing in the works that I was going to use in a future Newsletter about this very issue – of pausing along the path.

Trust me, it is merely a WIP, not quite ready for prime time and yet I feel compelled to write some of my “thinkings” now because so many of you are struggling.

Bear with me now as I write this. It is to you who are struggling and it is right from my heart. Please know that I write it because I want to help you.

I am not Mother Sternfinger standing before you with a freshly ironed apron, a furrowed brow, tapping my pointy-toed high-topped shoe and lecturing you with a voice that makes your arms feel like I just scritch-scratched the chalkboard with my gnarled fingernails…

Rather picture that I am beside you, in the sitting room of the MakeMeThinner Cottage on a comfy Victorian settee with a pot of aromatic tea steeping in a porcelain teapot on the old Duncan Phyfe coffee table.




Remember, I am Not Mother Sternfinger but I am Nancy, your in-the-flab-trenches Friend.

I care about you and I know how you feel because I have experienced the same weight and food issues as you have or are experiencing right now.

I have done every kind of rationalizing that my very imaginative mind can come up with to end previous DIEts and I have thunk up all the juicy reasons why I should not, could not and will not begin another dreaded DIEt ever again.

With that in mind, I write on…

We either do Medifast or we do not do it.

Read my previous February 2004 Newsletter about Don't Mess With Medifast. Here’s the link:

http://www.makemethinner.com/newsletter/medifast-february-newsletter.htm

Getting back with the program after a hiatus is terribly difficult. It is down-right HARD.


It is always best to go all the way to your goal before taking a side-trip. It is psychologically and physically easier.

I suppose that some people do need to take a break but I know that taking a pause would not have worked for me. It would have been too easy for me to rationalize and then I would have boinged right back up the scale and tipped it over.

We either do Medifast or we do not do it.

I'm determined not to panic about it, and ride this out with the mindset that 'this too shall pass' and it'll get better soon.

Personally I see some danger in thinking IT (the desire to eat off program) will pass.

I don’t think it ever passes. It takes discipline and hard work to choose to eat the right things every day.

Some folks are blessed with metabolisms that burn up everything they eat. Then there are folks like me with the metabolism of a slug.

Every single day of my life juicy donuts, rich cheesecake, fresh-baked pie or cookies or bread waft their vicious fumes down the hall of the college and into my nasies.

EVERY day!

I went to the mall tonight to buy some awesome fishnets (Because I can.) and I was assaulted by the sniffs of chocolate rolling out of the See’s Candy Store.

The chocolate odor tried to grab me by my slender shoulders and drag me inside for a FREE chocolate sample!

It took ALMOST all of my will power to say, “No thank you, Mrs. See. NOTHING, not even your excellent chocolate-covered caramels with pecans tastes as good as thin feels.”

I kicked Granny See in the chubby shins and ran like ninety down the mall and headed for the perfume counter!

I tried several new perfumes – I sprayed a card until it was drenched with some musky scent and stuck that smelly card under my proboscis for the return trip down the mall aisle.

I crossed to the other side of the aisle on my way toward the exit of the mall. I did not look to the right or the left.

I kept my beak pressed to the perfumey card, repeated my mantra, “Nothing tastes as good as thin feels, nothing tastes…”

I practically ripped the hinges off of the car door and climbed into the safety of Buzz.

I was a Starvin’ Marvin’ - I mean a TOTAL Starvin’ Marvin’ after work today.

I didn’t get but a 15 minute break today and I was stressed out, was training my replacement and drank but a couple of shakes, and ate a handful of broccoli and gave my NEW Fruit and Nut Granola bar to a friend to try.

I was BARless (No, Mikey, I did NOT say that I was BRAless!)

I was such a stupid, stupid Leopard Woman – I failed to have enough extra grub with me. I was not a good Boy Scout. I was not prepared. I always have an extra couple of RTD shakes in the trunk of Buzz (my VeeDub) and usually a few bars in my desk drawer. I was food depleted!

So I headed for the mall with a growly tummy. El-stoo-pee-doh!

I had visual and sensory overload. I was tired, hungry and not gonna cave to the rave of the flaves…

I stopped my shopping trip short (see how serious I am!), I avoided the temptations, drove directly home and fixed supper the moment I got in the back door here at the MakeMeThinner Cottage.

We always have prepared veggies and a big fat fresh green salad with tomaters and healthy stuff handy. I ate a handful of fresh shrimp while Terry fixed some grilled salmon.

I'm determined not to panic about it, and ride this out with the mindset that 'this too shall pass' and it'll get better soon.

“IT” does not pass. “IT” is always lurking.

Only you know you best. I don’t know what is best for you – taking a break, maintaining and then getting back on the train or going for the goal.

I know what is best for me and it is not taking a mini side trip along the way.

I decided that I just could not take the emotional upheaval and deal with the totally wiped out self-esteem that would occur if I failed to reach my goal once I started on the trip.

I am too fragile to go thru THAT (food control failure) ever again.

July 16, 2002 was the day that I began my LAST weight loss program. Ever. Not gonna do it again. I do not want a do over.

Again, PLEASE, please, please, do NOT take my comments as saying that a pause, or a break is WRONG for you.

I love you all, I do not want any of you to be honked at me.

I am just saying that I know me best. I don’t have it in me to ever do it again. I am choosing to stay where I am and that means daily weighing.

If I were to avoid the scale, it would mean that I was not where I should be.

I keep myself accountable. Every day I weigh and record it in my little journal.

Terry and Unca know where I am weight-wise and the people that see me on a regular basis know where I am. Believe me, people are always watching me.

If my hiney gets fluffy, Unca is honest and he tells me. I ;ove that man! He doesn’t like it when I ask him, “Does this make me look fat?” but he is totally honest. He sometimes says, “Hmm…your buns DO look a little fluffy.” I NEED that!

Terry will pinch my waist – if there is something too pinchy, he tells me. I NEED that! I LOVE that.

They help to keep me in line.

I wear fitted clothing.

No stretchy waists for me except for my leopardy underdoodies and one pair of leopard jammies. That’s it. Everything else fits me perfectly. If it gets tight, then it’s shakes only for a few days.

I wear belts, my skirts have a zipper and a button closure, and I wear form-fitting shirts. I will not allow myself to ‘grow into’ an article of clothing.

Again, only you know what is best for you.

Some of you will be able to take a pause and then get right back on.

However, as we read through the MakeMeThinner Forum, we find that more often than not, it is really difficult for folks to get back in the passenger car of the train to Thinsville, once they’ve taken an extended stay in the dining car.

The Depot is full of people waiting for their train to be called.

Some will get on when the conductor calls their name.

Some will stay in the depot for a while, contemplating and then get on the train when they decide that they really want to get to their destination: Thinsville.

Some will give up and go back to their old residence because it is where it seemed to be the most comfortable for them.

They may not truly want to be in that overweight residence but the journey to Thinsville seems too daunting, too treacherous, too long a journey, too difficult to endure.

Some day at a later time, they may return to the station and go for their destination.

Weight loss is a personal journey.

Sometimes we can enlist the help of others to travel with us – like we are doing with the MMT Forum Family.

Sometimes we can only go it alone. Some never leave home, some drop by the wayside and praise God, some of us cross the finish line.

We have encouraging words to speak into you along the way to the finish line.

Some of us have gone alone before you and we are waiting for you here at the finish line. We have a cool drink of water and a towel to place around your weary shoulders.

We want to see you to the end and then have you join us to encourage and to help others who are just squatting at the starting line.

There is room for all of you along the journey.

I don’t know where you are in all this but I want you to know that I know how it feels to be on the wrong train, going in the wrong direction.

Because of Medifast, I now know how it feels to be on the train that leads to Thinsville and I have no intention of ever getting off of it.

These are my own personal ‘thinkings’ on the topic.

You know you best. You know where you are right now.

Friends, you have to decide what will work for you and then do everything within your power to do it.

We will not think less of you if you decide to make a stop and rest in the depot for a refueling.

We will love ya, and care for ya and be kind to you because we are passionately committed to helping you reach and maintain optimal health.

All aboard! The train is about to pullout of the station!