The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[fedup]

First of all, Hi to everyone who was on here when I was last fall and to all those I don't know too! I'm "coming clean" about my last few absent months from the forum...

I am in a really strange place, and am not sure what to do. I absolutely HATE my weight right now. I can't understand how I let this happen. Last fall I lost 30 pounds in 8 weeks on MF. This forum really helped me achieve that, so I came back here hoping this forum can help me somehow get it together. I did so well, and was very close to my goal. (My signature is still my old one, so it probably shows my 160 weight and 150 goal.)

Unfortunately that is no longer the case. I'll have to update that signature if I ever get back on board here. It makes me sick to have to change those numbers though! I went from 190 to 160 before. Now I've regained everything plus 10 more. I've been OUT OF CONTROL. I don't mean just little splurges like I planned. I mean eat ALL the food type of eating. It started when I went on a cruise in December and went of MF. Then came Christmas right after and then I was on a roll. I'm so mad at myself. I feel like I have to start all over, and from a worse place than before since I'm heavier. I mean, I did it once so I feel like I ought to be able to do it again, but it's so hard. IT's hard to know I was almost there and now.... I mean I was wearing some cute clothes, fitting a size 12, I was on my way. Now I'm busting seams on my 16's cause I don't want to admit it's too small...

So I don't know what to do. Money is a big issue, I've got so much debt... but if I've tried to do it on my own for the past 5 months and all that got me was fatter. I know financially it's worth it if it improves self esteem and health, but it's still tough to manage. I know we're all in this boat at sometime. That's just one of the issues I need to consider. My biggest fear is that I won't be strong enough to do it again. That worries me more that regaining if I lose it again. I really think the reason I regained is not because I don't know how to eat sensible, but because I got started on a "downward spiral" with a cruise and the holidays at one time, then I just let the food take over again. I NEVER want to go through this again so if I can lose this weight I'll be much smarter next time. No, like I said regaining is a fear but not my biggest one. The biggest one is definitely wondering if I'm strong enough.

Sorry this is a book here. Just rambling on... Any advice would be appreciated.

[LeeannNH]

hi christy

im so sorry you have been having a hard time. i can relate to you in a serious way. i lost 35 pounds last year and gained it all back in like 2 months and just kept gaining. it was a true nightmare being out of control like that. the "downward spiral" is the worst thing. it was a difficult decision for me to come to medifast. the fears of failure, the fears of not being strong enough were definitely there for me.

the thing is that you ARE strong enough or you wouldnt have come back to this board. you are talking about your fears and i truly believe that is the first step to a healthier you.

as for the financial aspects, im not sure if there is a payment plan or anything you could arrange. if i were you i would contact nancy about that.

anyway, hang in there and know you are not alone with your feelings. im sure there are many others here that share your experiences

take good care
leeann

[KeleeGrl]

Christy I can also relate to you. A year and a half ago I was on Weight Watchers and I lost about 35 pounds and started feeling really good about myself and got too comfortable and started eating the same old stuff! I just started on MF on 4/25, but had to start almost 10 pounds heavier than I did when I started WW. I think I got so down on myself for gaining all my weight and more back that I just kept stuffing my face. I am such and emotional eater...its not even funny. I just wanted to let you know that your not alone in this situation and as you already know this forum has great support, so when you get on a frenzy just get back on here and read.

[tink]

Christy! Please don't give up! It sounds like we are about the same size I lost 40 pounds two years ago on Atkins for my second wedding in St. Thomas. I was so motivated you know to wear that halter wedding gown and I did it! I was wearing a good size 12 and sooo close to my goal weight. I knew I had gained a little weight back once we were home from the wedding trip and our lives took a routine. I woke up and it seemed like I had gained all the weight back plus some extra over the last two years. I was feeling it in my knees, my sleep patterns were off, I was always tired and had no energy. The things I could do before like riding go karts with my son weren't so easy as I had trouble getting in and out them. I was so mortified when I had to take a hand to pull me out! I had ordered my MF in February and dabbled for a few days but went back to the old eating habits. I decided on May 9th to take back control of my life no matter what. I have to do it for myself first, but my entire family will benefit I have no doubts about that. I have realized that there are so many emotions connected with our weight that I couldn't even begin to describe them all here. I am sure we all share many of the same ones. I have realized that really losing weight and taking control of your life is a very personal journey that we have to do ourselves. It can be a lonely and frustrating period especially when you have announced 100x that you are starting the next great weight loss plan only to return to your old habits. I almost was pained at having to announce the next latest and greatest but you know what it doesn't matter to me now. I see that MF works. Period. I enjoy coming here and reading the posts and adding my two cents from time to time! Just know that although you have to do this on your terms that there is a support team here for you who have a net out all the time to catch you if you fall or just need others to listen who truly understand.

[Jan]

Hi Christy
I'm so sorry you 're having such a hard time!! I think the majority of us us have experienced a similiar experience. What's done is done and all we can do is learn from it. The weight will come off again and this time you'll be MUCH smarter when it comes to keeping it off!! Nancy told me never to overeat 2 days in a row and if I know that I'm going to a special food occassion plan how to handle it. I also think it's a good idea to weigh once a week and if you're up 3 or more pounds be really careful til that weight is gone.That way we never get to far from our goal. ( I remember years ago when I was pretty thin and always was careful about what I ate saying to myself one day -- I'm sick of this I'm going to eat what I want!! Well, I did and promptly gained 60 pounds. I weighed 40 pounds more than when I was full term with my son ) I learned!! and now I think about what I eat. Those goodies just aren't worth the agony of the extra pounds.
Jan -- You can do it and so can I

[Nancy]

Do overs happen daily...it is not too late to begin again.

Permanent weight loss involves permanent changes in how you eat, how you use food and how you live.

Most foody people have experienced your same situation several times, Christy.

This can be your last time to go through a weight loss program if you decide to live your life differently - I did and I am keeping my weight in check. It is not easy but it is possible.

Using the things you learn in the weight loss program, following through all the way to your goal weight, then going through transition and following the BE SLIM philosophy, it is possible to manage your weight for life.

BTW, there are no payment plans. Sorry.

[DonicaB]

Christy~~HI. I bet if you ask everyone of us.....you would find that we have all lost weight and gained it back at some point. The difference is none of us are willing to just give up and live as FAT people.

I know my husband has been very frustrated with me in the past for losing weight and feeling good and then BAM!! gaining it all back plus some. I have often told him......AT LEAST I KEEP TRYING.

I guess what I am saying is......I have met people who actually try to tell me that they are happy being overweight and have decided that they are just going to live that way. Well.......I am not happy that way and no matter how many times I fail (which I am not going to do again)......I will keep trying until I get it right.

We are glad you have joined us.......I love this forum and the encouragement I get from it. I have learned so much about myself and why I do some of the things I do.......and why I have failed so many times before.........and I have learned it all from people I don't even know.

DonicaB

[Mommy2girls]

You are definitely not alone!!! I've done the same thing as you. (In this forum "Come on in" you can see post from me Mommy2girls if you really want to read all about it!)

But I just wanted to say, learn from your mistakes, don't beat yourself up over them and realize that this is a life struggle, not a passing fancy.

YOU CAN DO THIS AGAIN! And we are all here to support you!

Sheila
5 weeks = –18lbs

[LilMsTexas]

Hi ChristY.........I am ChristI. I have often had friends with the same name and generally they are spelt like yours. I call those friends "Y" and they call me "I" lol So........welcome "Y" and I hope you are able to get back on your journey soon. I know the money is rough and no amount of "GO TEAM" talk is going to change your financial situation. However, you must realize on some level that you can afford it or figure out a way or you wouldn't even be entertaining the notion. You've done it before and you know what it cost money wise......and now you know what it cost BODY wise to NOT do it all the way. I hope you are able to put all the pieces of the puzzle together and get back in here. We'll be waiting for you when you're ready.

And when you come back we'll have to refer to ourselves as Y and I or EVERYONE will be confused

CHEERS to ya!
ChristI

[Carrie]

Hi Christy,

Good to see you again!

Listen, stop all the negative thinking and approach each day as a new opportunity to work towards what you want.

No, I am not at my goal weight, but I have managed to lose and keep off over 70 pounds for 14 months now, and very slowly, I keep losing. Why? Because I have approached this as a lifelong committment to myself and my health. Every day for the rest of my life I am going to be in charge of what I put in my mouth. And that is not a burden but an opportunity. An opportunity to change years of thinking and behaving in a way that was harmful to myself, and begin taking care of myself. For the first time in my life.

Start reprogramming those negative thoughts. When they happen, stop yourself and replace it with something positive......i.e., I used to think things like 'You're so fat, you'll never be able to lose weight', 'You've got so much to lose, it's hopeless.' Now I stop myself and replace it with things like 'You can lose weight. You can get what you want. You're worth it. Eating well is taking care of yourself, NOT bingeing.' Etc etc and believe it or not, if you do it long enough you start thinking the good stuff as opposed to the bad stuff.

It's a journey, and it's a daily decision. Don't fret, just take action. C'mon girl you can do it!

Carrie

[dlr2424]

...........Christi...........with the I....... ....I don't think anyone could confuse you........ .........can't see that happening..................you are UNIQUE...........in the most positive way!!!!!!!!!!!!!.............. ............you stand out and shine.....................
Donna...dlr2424

[LilMsTexas]

awwww thank you sweet Donna. It's always good to feel UNIQUE

I'm having a hard time concentrating at work today and can only think about my doctor's appt on Monday. And my baby is sick today and my husband took him to the doctor and still hasn't called me back yet. The appt was 3.5 hours ago I was at home with him yesterday but I had appts. that I HAD to keep today I hate it when I'm not the one to take him to the doctor. Hopefully DH will call soon.

Have a great weekend!
ChristI

[Nancy]

Christi ~

Did your husby get home with the little puny One? How is he?

We are praying for you and your Monday appointment...

Carrie ~ right on! You are .

NO stinkin' thinkin' self thoughts allowed!

Christy ~ we've all messed up. Every one of us. We can get through this :stroll::stroll::stroll: together and we'll give ya Noggin' Noogies once in a while and keep ya in line.

Christy, we believe in YOU.

[LilMsTexas]

Nancy and everyone who has asked about baby Broden and his doctor's appt. Yesterday was horrible!! So unexpected.

He has had a fever since last Sunday.......but mild and I thought it was teething.....no other symptoms. Nancy you heard him being grumpy on the phone the other night too. He's just been out of sorts. But the fever got worse and worse and yesterday morning at the doctor it was 104! They checked rectally because the nurse could feel all the heat coming off of him. Then they sprung into action after they eliminated ears or throat or chest or ANYTHING else! They drew blood from his little arm, and it was an adult size vial because they didn't have any baby ones so that meant a LOT of blood. They did a catheter because they needed pee pee and a 1 year old won't pee in the cup of course but got none because he hadn't really drank anything that morning. They sent us home with a bag on his penis to collect urine and bring it back on Saturday. Then they gave him a HARPOON size shot of broad spectrum antibiotic and prescribed another antibiotic. They are growing cultures right now trying to figure out what he has, but hoping this antibiotics will take care of whatever it is. Because he is still eating and drinking for us the doctor said he would give us the night at home. But if the fever didn't stop they will hospitalize him the next day.

Now...skip ahead to Saturday morning. He hasn't had any fever since yesterday around 5 and then it was only low grade. He slept with us last night so I could merely cat nap and I felt him all night long. He has been cool and has slept peacefully. The antibiotics are working and whatever the problem is it is responding. We have a follow-up at 9 this morning but I know we will be told to finish the antibiotics and they will let us know on Monday what the cultures grew if anything. It was just soooooooooo bizarre...it still is.

Thank you for asking and I'll let you know what I find out. Yesterday scared me to death and broke my heart because of what all he had to go through. Needless to say Mommy wasn't allowed to be out of his sight all day and night after that.

Christi (sigh of relief)

[want2Bthin]

Christi-

I am so glad that Broden is doing better now. Have a great weekend and enjoy your family. My husband and I are going to a couples night tonight at church which is part of an all weekend "home improvement" conference. I am so excited. We don't spend very much time together without my daughter so this will be fun not to mention much needed.

Angelia