The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[nickieluv]

Thanks, Karli. It's funny, our date night fizzled really fast. I think we had one. We just both miss the baby so much when she's gone that even when we've planned to have a night alone, we always change our minds and go get her. We don't get enough family time together, all three of us home. But we also don't get ANY 'couple time' and I guess we need to try to find a way to make that happen more often while I'm working. Summer will be much better with me home again - we'll have every day as family time together - so maybe in the summer we can take more time alone.

Also our one date night (while I know it doesn't have to be a big elaborate thing) wound up being watching a rented movie and going to bed early. I know my husband wants to go out and do things, but I'm so afraid of eating at a restaurant and screwing up my plan that I'm housebound. Especially on a Saturday night, which is our only option - because I don't want to risk blowing weigh-in the next day. Yep, that's giving MF too much importance huh?

Anyway - we did have a decent talk and basically he doesn't understand any of what I feel and he probably thinks I'm crazy. But he listened, and he acknowledged that my feelings are real even though they make no sense to him. I'm very afraid of not being 'good enough' and all my relationships have ended with the guy leaving me except one. Well, two if you count my marriage. For a time I was feeling really confident and good about myself and my fears went away - but now they're back for whatever reason. Maybe because I feel like I'm losing really slowly (I know, there's no pleasing me) and I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever really make it to goal. And that undermines my confidence a great deal, no matter how many compliments I get.

Well, I need to have something to eat in a few minutes so I'm going to go. Long night - a concert, then choir practices at church. I'm hoping to be in bed by 10 at least. And it's looking like a 6-0 day today - I just don't feel like salmon and that's all I have.

[nickieluv]

News flash - I am not losing slowly. I went into Excel today and plotted all my weights since I started MF (yes, even including the January slump and all other cheats) and my average weight loss is 2.2lbs per week. I need to be at 2.3 to make goal by Christmas. So I am really close and I'm doing just fine. I'm glad I did that. It made it clear to me that I'm in good shape and I am making progress on this journey.

I'm probably going to ruin my night now by paying bills but my school pay came through tonight instead of tomorrow (it probably always does and I just never check) so I'm going to get that all taken care of so it's not weighing down my weekend - which is going to be full of running all over the place for Mother's Day on both sides of the family and my Mom's birthday tomorrow. I wound up with 4 RTDs and 2 bars today (I know, not supposed to - I wanted stew but I waited too long and didn't have enough time to cook it before the concert). Got in all my water but I'm feeling dry and thirsty so I'll have some more before bed. Hoping for good news tomorrow on the scale (when am I NOT hoping that, though?).

[bikipatra]

I use fitday so it does all that math for me. Have you tried it? It's kind of fun.

[nickieluv]

I've heard lots of you talk about FitDay and I thought of checking it out - but it's fun for me to create spreadsheets. I know, I'm strange. But I already had it basically done to compute my losses from here to goal, so I only had to plug in the numbers since Christmas and it did it's thing.

Wearing size 18 no-stretch jeans today - they went right on and zipped and even when I bought them last week they were too tight. Amazing. I thought it would be another 3 weeks at least before I could wear them.

Scale is moving down again - I am cautiously optimistic. And with lots of celebration brunches and dinners this weekend (2 Saturday, 1 Sunday) I'm already planning to take my own food. I might try to find a L&G but why pay to eat out when I could just have a shake and wait till I get home? That doesn't sound like me. But it is me now!

Friday - sigh of relief. I put in for my personal day Monday but haven't heard back yet. My voice feels better today so hopefully it's coming back. I had no pain but I've been hoarse all week long. Last night I was cracking and it was only a 4th line D. I'm usually good for at least a 6th or a 7th above that. But the week is almost over, and I hope I do get approved for my day off Monday because by the sound of this weekend, I'm going to need it.

[bikipatra]

I hope you get you day off! You deserve it.

[Mavesse]

Hi Nickie...

If you don't get approved for your personal day, it sounds like a sick day (or a few) is going to be right behind it. If your voice is tired, the rest of you could probably use a rest too

I'm really in awe of you going to all these meals out and bringing a shake. All the social eating is a real challenge for me and I think I'll try your strategy

Hope you're having a great day,

Mavesse

[Mike]

Nickie,
You are doing great. Keep it up, keep busy, and it will just become natural.
As for the relationship stuff, it all about open communication. When Di and I don't communicate with each other clearly, that seems to be when we start having a difficult time. Yeah, men are different and we don't catch on to the "clues" that women give us (most of the time), so sometimes ya just gotta come out and let us know.

[holberry]

Nikie,
if your personal day is not approved, I would take a sick or two as mav suggested! Cant take the days with you and you do not want to run yourself down.
hope the scale does it's magic for YOU!
hb

[SuzyQ66]

Hi Nicki - 2.2 pound average per week is great. I hope you have a great weekend and that you get your day off. We all can use those every once in a while.

[nickieluv]

Thank you all for pulling for me!

I did get approved for my personal day, thank goodness. I'm going to try to really enjoy it in terms of just taking it easy - no big projects to tackle.

The weekend has changed a bit - my mom's b-day party was tonight instead of tomorrow, tomorrow my daughter and I are going to her friend's b-day party in the afternoon, and Sunday is all up in the air. The party tonight was weird. The food looked really good, but there was no green for me to have. The steak tips might have been OK, but they were marinated and the marinade had tons of sugar. So I declined and just had a shake. I was relieved to not get a big hassle about it from my SIL - she always seems to take it personally when you don't eat her food. But she was fine with it. I made a plate for the baby and I did end up having 3 small bites of the meat after all but that was it.

So, they were all planning on Mother's Day brunch and it may have been a coincidence, but we were talking about it and I said I probably wouldn't eat and I'd done that before at a buffet and not been charged so it should be fine. So then my SIL decided she didn't want a big meal and could we think of something else - she didn't want to go to a buffet and gorge herself. I feel like I shamed them all into changing their plans and that's not what I meant to do. Everyone was commenting about how good I looked. And my brother asked me when we were getting ready to leave how it felt to leave a party and still be able to breathe and move (not being stuffed to the gills). I know these are all good things and if my example does lead someone to change (all but 2 adults there were very overweight (I'm not including myself in that 2 - yet)) that's a good thing - but I felt guilty somehow that Sunday is now a big question mark. And I'm pretty certain that everyone would have been much more comfortable if I had gone along and stuffed myself too like they did.

This is the first event where I've had these kinds of feelings afterwards. It's not going to stop me from sticking to plan and doing whatever I must to make that happen. But it was just, like I said, weird.

Well, I've got beef stew in the microwave - another 6-0 day and not a compliant one because I had 2 bars again - more out of laziness and boredom than anything else, so that's not a good thing. I need to have a L&G tomorrow or I'm going to get way too hungry. As it is, though, I'm tired and hoping I can stay awake long enough to even eat the stew. So as Tigger says, TTFN - ta ta for now.

[nickieluv]

It's almost midnight and I'm still up. I was watching TIVO stuff. Wasting time. The good news is that I was all set to eat a jar of pickles - yes, a jar - I had them all transferred to another container and then I realized I wasn't hungry, I was tired. I didn't want a jar of pickles, I want to sleep. And I've been a moron and forced myself to stay up way too late just to watch television. So why am I here? Can't seem to just go upstairs and call it a day. Not sure why - I've got to get up early with the baby tomorrow because my husband is going to be gone all day. I can nap with her - bliss - but that's no reason to stay up late now. One more quick check of e-mail and I promise I'm going to sleep.

[nickieluv]

I saw a nice number today - and an INSANELY nice number halfway through the day - hopeful for tomorrow.

It sure is quiet here today. Usually first thing in the morning there are about 35 posts I need to check out - today, there was 1 (of course I was on until almost midnight the night before) - then the next time I came there were 3 - this time a great big 11. I hope everyone is out enjoying life!

I forgot to pack a shake for the b-day party today because we were running late, so I had a diet soda and three slices of a hot dog. As soon as I got home I had my L&G - a turkey burger with a slice of melted cheese on top (I usually have 2 burgers so I subbed the cheese instead) and raw green pepper slices. Both of which I have not had before so in hindsight that was a little risky when I'm hoping for a good weigh-in - but I think it was all legal. 2 more supplements to go today - I'm feeling chocolate cravings so I think they'll both be hot chocolate, but not at the same time - I've still got time to spread them out before bed. And I got in 33oz of water today and I'm going to double that before I go to bed, too.

I have to confess I was sort of hoping for more comments at the party today about my weight loss - I mean, yesterday my family was full of them. But my old boss who (whom? - that always confuses me) I haven't seen in almost a year said I looked good - so while that may have been a generic comment you make to anyone you haven't seen in a while I'm going to take it as a compliment. I swear I was not this self-involved before - I hope when I've been maintaining for a while I won't feel this constant urge for reassurance.

Well, that's all - just popping in, probably this will be the last time today. My bad mood of the past week seems to have lifted - it may just be the promise of having Monday off but that's enough in my opinion. My husband has already promised I can sleep in (or try to, anyway - I seem to be up by 8 at the latest no matter how late I stay up or how tired I am) and I'm planning on a very lazy PJs kind of day. Up until 3 or so, anyway - after that I have piano lessons and I don't think they'd appreciate me in my PJs.

[bikipatra]

Nickie, I hope you get your good number tomorrow!

[bikipatra]

Happy Mother's Day, Nickie!

[nickieluv]

Thanks, Biki! It was a wonderful Mother's Day. And I got an AMAZING number on the scale - 216.2!!!!! I lost almost 4# this week!

Today we went out for lunch. I had a small salad with Italian dressing (but I'm sure it was loaded with calories so I tried not to use too much) and chicken that was appropriately prepared and some of my husband's prime rib (I have him half my chicken). I know I ate too much lean and not enough green. But it was a really nice meal and I did not have any dessert so though I was not strictly compliant, I know I did OK. That was at noon so I also had all day to digest it. We went for a walk about 4 after a nice nap (etc. ) to my MIL's house to wish her a happy Mother's Day - it's not far, about three or four blocks one way - but when my husband asked if I wanted to walk it I actually said 'yes.' I ALWAYS say 'no' when he wants to go for a walk.

So it was just a fabulous day. I had water with lunch and a glass of tea today but that's it for liquids, but I don't know that I'll get in more before bed. I will be having some beef stew as my last supplement of the day, probably in another hour or so. And I am really looking forward to my day off tomorrow, too. All around I just feel really great and now, I need to get on and read the rest of the new posts! I haven't even posted on roll call yet or changed my ticker!