Suddenly I am sad. Drop in blood sugar after having the bar an hour ago? It's not candy, I know, but it tastes like it. Tired? Dismayed at the admittedly minor mess the baby is making with her toys? Don't know. But it's making me hungry. Luckily I have a piano lesson coming soon and after that I'll make dinner for the baby and myself. I don't doubt I'll make it through the day compliant (really) but just popping in with an update. Funny because I was so up just a little while ago. Maybe I'm just lonely because it's a beautiful day and I'm sick of feeling like a single parent with my husband on nights. I imagine he's sick of it too on his end. That temporary transfer to days did go through, and will begin May 29th. So we'll see how those 8 weeks go (although for 5 of them I'll still be a single parent at night because he's taking the shift change in order to do musical theatre - and the other 3 I'll be out all night every night doing my own musical - whatever).... Writing that, perhaps that's why I'm depressed. Yes he's coming back to days but nothing will be different, and then it's right back to nights and I'll be alone all the time. It's been almost a year now that he's been on this shift. It sucks.
Well, I'm going to take my whiny self and go about my business.
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Nickieluv
by nickieluv » May 2nd, 2007, 4:02 pm
Thanks. 
I already feel a bit better. My piano student had a great lesson today and really made a lot of progress since last week. He goes in spurts so it's nice to see him getting interested again. Then I had dinner and that helped, actually. Probably not a great thing since I'm an emotional eater, but it was a compliant meal at least. Now the baby is watching Dora and when it's over it's bedtime for her. I love putting her to bed at night. We have a great little routine and even though she doesn't really need me to rock her anymore, I can't give it up. So I know I'll be feeling cheerier soon. Tomorrow is Thursday and that means it's almost Friday and that's always good news. I'm off to watch Dora (ugh - she'll outgrow it soon, right?).
I already feel a bit better. My piano student had a great lesson today and really made a lot of progress since last week. He goes in spurts so it's nice to see him getting interested again. Then I had dinner and that helped, actually. Probably not a great thing since I'm an emotional eater, but it was a compliant meal at least. Now the baby is watching Dora and when it's over it's bedtime for her. I love putting her to bed at night. We have a great little routine and even though she doesn't really need me to rock her anymore, I can't give it up. So I know I'll be feeling cheerier soon. Tomorrow is Thursday and that means it's almost Friday and that's always good news. I'm off to watch Dora (ugh - she'll outgrow it soon, right?).-
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by DonicaB » May 2nd, 2007, 4:18 pm
Nickie~ I hope tomorrow is a better day for you. 
I really miss the rocking stage. I would still do it, but my 18 year old just won't let me. Neither will my 16 year old! Imagine for a moment, me (a 5'4" woman) trying to rock 2 nearly 6' boys. One weighs nearly 200# the other 150#.
What a sight that would be! Fortunately for me they will still hug and kiss me, even in front of their friends. I'm thankful for that. 
Donica
I really miss the rocking stage. I would still do it, but my 18 year old just won't let me. Neither will my 16 year old! Imagine for a moment, me (a 5'4" woman) trying to rock 2 nearly 6' boys. One weighs nearly 200# the other 150#.
What a sight that would be! Fortunately for me they will still hug and kiss me, even in front of their friends. I'm thankful for that.
Donica
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Hi
by dede4wd » May 2nd, 2007, 5:25 pm
I really read your posts Nickie and I understand. It's nice to see that your goal is attainable by Christmas...yes, it's doable! Yes, you might plateau, yes, you might lose 3lbs after the plateau, it's all moving in the right direction and I hope that's what you focus on! You're getting healthier! Do you REALLY think you'll be DISAPPOINTED on Chrismas because you're 10lbs from goal? I DON'T THINK SO! Your whole mindset will be changed by then, you'll look unbelieveably fabulous and you'll FEEL so good! Doable? Yes. In the timeframe? Probably. If not? Who cares, you'll look and feel GREAT!
Just think, look at those fruits and sweets and you were looking at the fruits? That's HUGE! Changing your mindset, changing your LIFE! That's awesome!
Yes, the Dora will pass, then it will be speed metal (just kidding!) Enjoy the rocking while you can! Donnica, you just gave me a funny enough visual to shoot diet coke out my nose! C'mere kid, get on the rocking chair..OWWWW! Get off Get off, oh my hip!
I'm cheering for you!
D
Just think, look at those fruits and sweets and you were looking at the fruits? That's HUGE! Changing your mindset, changing your LIFE! That's awesome!
Yes, the Dora will pass, then it will be speed metal (just kidding!) Enjoy the rocking while you can! Donnica, you just gave me a funny enough visual to shoot diet coke out my nose! C'mere kid, get on the rocking chair..OWWWW! Get off Get off, oh my hip!
I'm cheering for you!
D
Age: 37 Ht: 5'10"
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by nickieluv » May 2nd, 2007, 5:53 pm
Thanks, Donica and Dede. You both made me smile and I needed that!
You're right, Dede, wherever I am at Christmas I will feel tons better, even better than I do already. I went ahead tonight and made up my next set of reward charts and goal graphs for when I break 200. I just needed something to focus on and that was it for tonight. I mostly did it because I was a little worried that the goal weight I've chosen was not within the healthy/normal range - but it was, by 2.5 pounds. So it's in the high end of normal, but that's when I'll start transitioning and start expanding my family. That's the real reward - that's the whole reason I'm doing this. To have healthy pregnancies (or a better chance for that, I know even thin there are no guarantees) and to raise my children in a more healthy way than I was.
I am already proud that my daughter is almost 2 and has never had a McDonald's french fry (in my presence - I can't speak for the sitter but at least she'll know the rules of my house) or a speck of soda. She drinks milk, plain water, and sometimes juice. And we just recently bought the V8 Splash for her instead of fruit juice. She snacks on apples and cheese and yogurt - and I'm finally getting out of the mindset that she 'needs' chips and cookies - although she does have raisins and Goldfish. It's been said to me here, and now I get it, that in the house we can keep only good choices. When she's out at a party or visiting, that's when the treats can be had - because we don't do that very often. She LOVES chocolate already so we don't keep it in the house (besides that it would be too tempting for me) and she's fine with it when I tell her we don't have any so why buy it?
Well, my husband is on the phone so I'm going to go have some cocoa and go nighty-night. Thanks for the well-wishes!
You're right, Dede, wherever I am at Christmas I will feel tons better, even better than I do already. I went ahead tonight and made up my next set of reward charts and goal graphs for when I break 200. I just needed something to focus on and that was it for tonight. I mostly did it because I was a little worried that the goal weight I've chosen was not within the healthy/normal range - but it was, by 2.5 pounds. So it's in the high end of normal, but that's when I'll start transitioning and start expanding my family. That's the real reward - that's the whole reason I'm doing this. To have healthy pregnancies (or a better chance for that, I know even thin there are no guarantees) and to raise my children in a more healthy way than I was.
I am already proud that my daughter is almost 2 and has never had a McDonald's french fry (in my presence - I can't speak for the sitter but at least she'll know the rules of my house) or a speck of soda. She drinks milk, plain water, and sometimes juice. And we just recently bought the V8 Splash for her instead of fruit juice. She snacks on apples and cheese and yogurt - and I'm finally getting out of the mindset that she 'needs' chips and cookies - although she does have raisins and Goldfish. It's been said to me here, and now I get it, that in the house we can keep only good choices. When she's out at a party or visiting, that's when the treats can be had - because we don't do that very often. She LOVES chocolate already so we don't keep it in the house (besides that it would be too tempting for me) and she's fine with it when I tell her we don't have any so why buy it?
Well, my husband is on the phone so I'm going to go have some cocoa and go nighty-night. Thanks for the well-wishes!
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by nickieluv » May 3rd, 2007, 2:23 pm
Not much to report but I have my NSV for the day.
This morning I got dressed in a skirt/jacket outfit that I bought for my Master's degree presentation in front of the college faculty. I can't remember if it was Spring of '03 or '04, but either way it was years ago. I wore it that one time and then promptly outgrew it, but it was practically new so it was something I couldn't see tossing.
Well, when I wore this same outfit a few weeks ago, it fit and I was very pleased. I put it on today and IT'S TOO BIG! The jacket is really unflattering now, the skirt is a little more forgiving. I didn't realize how bad the jacket looked until halfway through the day (it flares out and makes my hips look even more gi-normous than usual) or I might not have worn it. So, the jacket is going bye-bye!
This is especially cool because I now have something concrete to tie my weight gain to. I breezed from 200 to 270 without knowing how it happened. Now I know that in either '03 or '04 I passed through the realm of the 230s (that's what I weighed when it fit a few weeks ago). Not something to be proud of, but it narrows things down some at least.
Don't want to jinx anything but I am knocking on the door of teen numbers today! Barring a catastrophe within my control or scale persnickety-ness out of my control, I should see them by Sunday for roll call. Yay! I can see onederland peeking around the corner....
This morning I got dressed in a skirt/jacket outfit that I bought for my Master's degree presentation in front of the college faculty. I can't remember if it was Spring of '03 or '04, but either way it was years ago. I wore it that one time and then promptly outgrew it, but it was practically new so it was something I couldn't see tossing.
Well, when I wore this same outfit a few weeks ago, it fit and I was very pleased. I put it on today and IT'S TOO BIG! The jacket is really unflattering now, the skirt is a little more forgiving. I didn't realize how bad the jacket looked until halfway through the day (it flares out and makes my hips look even more gi-normous than usual) or I might not have worn it. So, the jacket is going bye-bye!
This is especially cool because I now have something concrete to tie my weight gain to. I breezed from 200 to 270 without knowing how it happened. Now I know that in either '03 or '04 I passed through the realm of the 230s (that's what I weighed when it fit a few weeks ago). Not something to be proud of, but it narrows things down some at least.
Don't want to jinx anything but I am knocking on the door of teen numbers today! Barring a catastrophe within my control or scale persnickety-ness out of my control, I should see them by Sunday for roll call. Yay! I can see onederland peeking around the corner....
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Don't you just love it when clothes you wore just a few weeks ago are too big!!! How exciting.....I'm really happy for you! 
by Pashta » May 3rd, 2007, 5:08 pm
Hey Nickie, that's just what I'm hoping for too, cause I have till Monday. Let's race!
- Tonia
Start: 03/20/06 (restart 3/19/07)
Age: 33 Ht: 5'5"
3 kids: 3 mos, 18 mos, 11 yrs old
Month 1: -4.4,-0.8,-4.0,-2.2 (-11.4, -7 in.)
Month 2: -1.6,-1.6,-3.4
Start: 03/20/06 (restart 3/19/07)
Age: 33 Ht: 5'5"
3 kids: 3 mos, 18 mos, 11 yrs old
Month 1: -4.4,-0.8,-4.0,-2.2 (-11.4, -7 in.)
Month 2: -1.6,-1.6,-3.4
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by MerryMary » May 3rd, 2007, 5:41 pm
nickieluv wrote:This is especially cool because I now have something concrete to tie my weight gain to. I breezed from 200 to 270 without knowing how it happened. Now I know that in either '03 or '04 I passed through the realm of the 230s (that's what I weighed when it fit a few weeks ago). Not something to be proud of, but it narrows things down some at least.
What a great NSV, Nickie! And I really enjoyed your reflection about when you were that size before. Kind of puts the weight gain into perspective--it did not happen overnight
But in some ways you are now turning the clock back ... further and further! I am cheering you on to the teens! 
Mary
MARY
Started MF 11/6/06; reached goal 9/27/07.
Started MF 11/6/06; reached goal 9/27/07.
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by nickieluv » May 3rd, 2007, 7:12 pm
Lizabette wrote:YAY, TEENY-GIRL!
Lizabette you are my new best friend for saying that! I know you meant my weight and not my size, but you can call me 'teeny' all you want.
This was a neat NSV, thanks for noticing you guys! I hadn't had this experience before of things getting too big all of a sudden like that. I guess because most things I wear pretty often since I don't have that much to choose from right now. But this outfit had been in the laundry for a while....
I'll race you, Pashta, but I'm a really slow runner so you can take a little nap on the way....
Mary, I hope I am turning the clock back in more ways than one. It was nice though to put a date to a weight, even in a general sense. I found myself at my top weight wondering how on earth I had let it go for so long. Now I see that it all came from somewhere - and I'm only 20 pounds away from what I weighed in I believe 2001. So if I think back, it seems like I gained about ten pounds a year. And I can see how that could sneak up on you. Which just makes it even more important that I remember to be like all those other successful maintainers and jump on those pesky 2 or 3 pounds before it becomes much, much more.
Well, I'm making the oatmeal cookies tonight because I have a trip tomorrow night and I'm out of bars, and I don't know if my order will be in before I leave, so I need something portable. I didn't have vanilla extract so instead I mixed 1/4c SF pancake syrup with the water (I tripled the recipe so it's not as much syrup as it seems) and I'm hoping they turn out OK. If they're done before I sign off I'll check back again.
Doing a 6/0 today because of a busy schedule - tomorrow I should be able to get in a L&G though. I also was about 4 hours between meals 3 and 4 tonight, and am going on 3.5 hours between meals 5 and 6, so I hope I haven't screwed anything up too much. Well anyway, here's to the experimental cookies....
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by nickieluv » May 3rd, 2007, 7:39 pm
Forgot to mention I didn't have the Splenda either, so the SF syrup took care of both flavor and sweet - they were pretty good! I have a little melon baller/cookie scooper thingy so I was able to make 15 same-sized cookies out of 3 packets. I packed up 10 for tomorrow in case I'm out so long that I need 2 meals, and I ate 5 as my last supplement tonight. Not bad! I honestly expected them to be too gross to swallow but they were a nice change of pace. Kind of gooey in the middle and a bit like flexible plastic on the outside but flavorful enough.
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