The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[falisamarie]

I was thinking today about some of the posts that I see on here daily and some thoughts came to mind and I wanted to share.

One of the posts was the one concerning how some of the medical professionals out there treat obese patients. While I will be the first to say that it is me who I blame for the weight I gained I also know that I was addicted to food. Why is it so easy for others to look at people who have an addiction to alcohol or drugs and say, wow that is just awful, they really need to get some help? Is an addiction to food any different? My answer to this question is actually yes and no. When someone who is addicted to food gets around certain foods they have the same physical reactions that a heroine addict has when they are around heroin. Their heart beats faster, their blood pressure goes up, and they have the same cravings for that food that the heroin addict has for the heroin. The difference in my opinion is that when the heroin addict or alcoholic decides they are ready to break their addiction they can chose to stay away from the things they are addicted too, however the food addict does not have that option, the food addict still has to go to the grocery stores and pass all their favorite restrauants and eat everyday basically they have to learn to live life everyday facing the very thing they are addicted too yet somehow control it. So I ask you why are food addicts viewed differently than any other addict.

Along these same lines I was thinking of all the posts lately about people going on vacation or celebrating special occasions and asking if they should go off program. This is pretty simple in my opinion. Think how you would feel if you had a loved one who was a recovering alcoholic and they came to you and said "I am going on vacation and I think I am going to drink while I am gone then I will get right back to AA when I get back" think honestly for a minute how you would react to that. I know personally I would panic and tell them they absolutely could not do that! I would beg them not to drink. I think the same applies here, I posted something yesterday and it has become my new motto "this is not my diet, it is now my lifestyle. I need to change my life to fit the program not change the program to fit my life."

I will close this probably too long post by saying this.....My name is Lisa and I am a recovering food addict.
Thanks for reading and I hope this did not offend anyone that certainly was not my intent

Lisa

[Loribug]

That is very astute of you Lisa. I am a food addict also. recovering

[Shana]

Great post Lisa!

[Mom23]

I've said the same thing to my husband. I've been doing a lot of soul searching since starting MF and I, too, must say "hello, my name is Bobbi and I'm a food addict in recovery"

Thanks Lisa!

[FORMOMMY]

Great post Lisa and I TOTALLY agree! As a matter of fact, I have used those same words when describing my eating issues to my husband who has desparately tried to understand my years of battling with food. See from the age of about 19 to about 30 I struggled with Anorexia and then Bulimia. I ended up in the hospital for 3 weeks and also ended up getting mono. I couldn't stand up without passing out and was on an IV for 2 1/2 weeks. Once my eating disorder was diagnosed and discovered by my loved ones, I turned to bulimia and exercise to control my weight. This is a brief description of what my life was like but you get the picture.

I became a born again Christian at the age of 31 and through His love I got well. Mind you I was on antidepressents and seeing a shrink for about a year and it really wasn't helping all that much...the food was still there and the emotional issues were still there. I couldn't not just eat like (as Lisa so eloquently described it) a drug addict or alcoholic just says "No".

Fast forward and I put on ALOT of weight over the years slowly - but basically I settled in at a certain weight. I wasn't emotionally eating - some slip ups here and there - but I still had my issues with food. Along comes my husband's back injury, me leaving my kids to go back to work and being the sole bread winner and BAM! Food was my solace - yes, I still had the Lord but I kept trying to handle it myself instead of through His grace and using His strength.

Lisa - everything you said is what I believe and have lived through and will probably always live with....but I am in control (with the Lord's help) and I decide what and when to eat. I am not letting my emotions control what I do with food and I am not letting the food control me. My life is more than the food I eat.

Thank you Lisa for your words and your insight. You continue to amaze me with every post.

I am Michelle and I am a recovering food addict!!! And guess what...looks like I am in good company.

[MusicalMomma]

I agreed with about 95% of what you said Lisa. Very insightful and it's true, most of us here are addicted to food...not healthy food...junk food. I do feel that drug addicts and alcoholics deal with the same "lables" we food addicts deal with however. I know that people look down on drug and alchohol addicts as weak and pathetic. I knew who the "druggies" were in my neighborhood and no one wanted to tolerate them much less feel any pity for them. YES, there are rehab organizations for them because some insighful people realized this was an illness. However, society, as a whole, still veiws them and us as lazy,weak minded and pathtic. Sad but true.

Also, regarding going off plan. I personally have had no problems with going off and getting right back on. I know of a few recovering alcoholics that can also have the occasional drink. It's rare, but we can't all be blanketed into the the same catagory here. We're all different. We all have differnt triggers. We all have different coping mechanisms. Some good, some not so good. We all have to leave room for people to live their lives in the same freedom we want to be given. As I totally admire and respect all of you who stick 100% without waivering, those of us who do "waiver" and keep on pushing for the goal (all be it at a slower pace) would like the same respect and admiration. We all approach our weighloss efforts a little differently.

I don't mean to put down anything you said my dear friend Lisa. I only wish to encourage those who have not kept to the "straigh and narrow" that it's OK to keep going and no one has failed because they have "cheated". I guess I still dispise that word "cheated". I have never once cheated on my new life style. I have just chosen to allow myself some room to enjoy other foods OCCASIONALLY that are not on plan. It's what works for me. It's what keeps me going. It's what gives me hope that I WILL reach my goal and maintain it.

To all of my medifast friends....we're all on the same journey, but all have different modes of transportation, but we will ALL get there if we DON'T GIVE UP

Have a wonderful weekend

[dede4wd]

Hello, my name is DeDe and I'm a sugar head and a tacobellaholic...

HI DEDE (in unison).

Loved your post Lisa!

We're learning how to conquer our problems and that's why we're going to win!

DeDe

[MISSANNE]

Great post Lisa!


My name is Michelle and I'm a food addict learning to rebuild my life.

[Arklahoma]

Lisa ~ Your post could very easily be the that most of us need, and I agree with 100% of what you said. I've suspected for many years that I was a food addict, compulsive overeater, binger, etc. but I've never said it out loud or admitted it to anyone, until about a week ago when I shared this with my husband. He was stunned!

I know it's time to be honest with myself and admit it ... I am a food addict and will have to be dealing with this the rest of my life.

[Jan]

Hi Lisa,
Your post was absolutely terrific. I completely agree with you. We are food addicts. Not just junk food addicts -- but plain food addicts. We eat almost anything and everything and have great difficulty stopping. We eat to excess!!! And as we all know anything eaten in excess can cause us big big problems. Five oz of a nice lean steak is ok -- but we're munching right thru the whole 8 - 12 oz or perhaps even more. We even eat when we are not at all hungry.
I think it is a very very dangerous thing to PLAN to go off program. It lets you tell yourself it's "ok" to slip back into old habits. That's exactly what we are trying to do -- get rid of our old habits and learn new ways of eating -- for the rest of our lives. We must learn not to treat ourselves with food. You know "I've been soooo good so now I'll just ...... This is especially true during the weight loss phase. It is very very easy to be off and running again. To plan to go off program also establishes a dangerous pattern. How many off plan "treats" are allowed. How far apart should they be???? Why play around. Sure, I know many many people have slips -- but few are intentional. It is sooo easy to fall back into old habits. Please don't give yourself permission to do so. It just makes it much harder in the long run. I know of no alcohol counselor who would advise a client to just have a "little drink" if they so desire and then get right back to sobriety. It is a slippery slippery slope!!!
As most of you know I am on maintenance. It's not easy!! The old desire to go and "pig out" really doesn't leave. However through much practice the habit is not quite as strong as it once was. Now I can more easily choose to take control over what I put in my mouth. The main difference on maintenance is I can now choose to eat "off program" once in awhile. But I still must be careful. I don't want to be "off and running again "either. I still must view food as fuel and not as a treat! Please don't set yourself up to struggle.
jan.

[Mom23]

Hi Lisa,
Your post was absolutely terrific. I completely agree with you. We are food addicts. Not just junk food addicts -- but plain food addicts. We eat almost anything and everything and have great difficulty stopping. We eat to excess!!! And as we all know anything eaten in excess can cause us big big problems. Five oz of a nice lean steak is ok -- but we're munching right thru the whole 8 - 12 oz or perhaps even more. We even eat when we are not at all hungry.
I think it is a very very dangerous thing to PLAN to go off program. It lets you tell yourself it's "ok" to slip back into old habits. That's exactly what we are trying to do -- get rid of our old habits and learn new ways of eating -- for the rest of our lives. We must learn not to treat ourselves with food. You know "I've been soooo good so now I'll just ...... This is especially true during the weight loss phase. It is very very easy to be off and running again. To plan to go off program also establishes a dangerous pattern. How many off plan "treats" are allowed. How far apart should they be???? Why play around. Sure, I know many many people have slips -- but few are intentional. It is sooo easy to fall back into old habits. Please don't give yourself permission to do so. It just makes it much harder in the long run. I know of no alcohol counselor who would advise a client to just have a "little drink" if they so desire and then get right back to sobriety. It is a slippery slippery slope!!!
As most of you know I am on maintenance. It's not easy!! The old desire to go and "pig out" really doesn't leave. However through much practice the habit is not quite as strong as it once was. Now I can more easily choose to take control over what I put in my mouth. The main difference on maintenance is I can now choose to eat "off program" once in awhile. But I still must be careful. I don't want to be "off and running again "either. I still must view food as fuel and not as a treat! Please don't set yourself up to struggle.
jan.

In my soul searching and realization that I am a food addict, I realized that the other diet plans that I've tried did not work for me because I "cheated" or allowed myself to go off program for a special occaision or treat. I was given too much "leeway". It then snowballed on me and I gained the weight back. Too many food choices and combinations gave me an excuse to rationalize and in the long-run fail. With Medifast, I don't have too many choices, I know exactly what I can put in my mouth (supplements and L &G). I also remember all too well that 3 or 4 days of feeling yukky and don't want to feel that if I have to re-start, and this is one of my incentives to keep me on the straight & narrow MF Road.

My food compulsion is a daily (sometimes hourly or minute-ly ) struggle with me. Medifast is helping me get through this struggle -- along with all of you and the Lord

[FORMOMMY]

Well said MusicalMomma...I too allowed myself to eat other items on 2 occasions during my 3 months on MF. I knew I was going to...I allowed myself the extra that I wanted to have and then stopped. I actually needed to do that so that I can get control of this food monster that has indwelled me for so many years.

On Easter I allowed myself a scoop of a potatoe casserole and I had a salad AND veggies. I chose not to partake of dessert but again - it was a choice and not because I would be "bad".

I guess I kind of see your point of view because even though I do have issues with food - I am working to get to a place where I chose the healthy foods 99% of the time and ALLOW myself that 1% of the time to veer off and eat something I normally wouldn't have. Not cheated but chose differently for that particular meal. If I can do that and not binge or beat myself up over being a terrible human being, then I have come so, so far from my years of self-deprecation.

I admire those like Lisa who have not waivered and that is probably why she has lost so much more than I (it is our running joke that I am always trying to catch up to her - HA!); but I am truly happy with my progress. Because, for me, it goes so much further than the scale number. MF has helped me to deal with food in a whole other way.

Sorry for being wordy on both posts - Lisa just touched a very emotional area of my life that I haven't shared with too many people. That is why I love this forum so much. No one judges you here and something we may write can help someone else in ways we never could imagine.

Hugs to all of you wonderful people!!!

[falisamarie]

I wanted to post and say that I want you all to know that I admire EVERYONE on this board. Those who by the grace of God have been able to get where we are and stay 100% compliant are no better than someone who accidentally slips or choses to have a meal off program.

Food will forever be a part of our lives and we MUST learn to live with it and enjoy it....not fear it.

For me personally the CHOICE I have made to stay compliant is something that I personally must do because I know all too well the control that food has had over me in my life. We are all on the same road and there are some who chose to make rest stops along the way and I believe that those people are also learning to overcome their addiction like everyone else they are just doing it somewhat differently than others. but the destination is the same for everyone and it does not matter when you arrive but what matters is making it to the end.

We are all unique people and that is what makes each of us special in our own way.

While I know that society at times does view the drug addicts and alcoholics as pathetic. I was mainly referring to the Medical world. Most insurances including government funded insurances such as Medicaid and Medicare will pay for the drug addict or alcoholic to get the help they need, but I know that for me personally anytime I wanted to do something medically about my weight it was like pulling teeth to get the insurance company to help at all.

Someone very wise said something to me last night I want to share with you guys but it is somewhat paraphrased...."you can fall 10,000 times but as long as you get up 10,001 times you have not failed!"

Lisa

[kmr]

Thank you for that post Lisa. We have the same goal weight and we are both almost at the same weight now. We can do this together! Thank you again for your words of inspiration!

[Allison Onederland]

Wow Lisa! Truer words were never spoken! It's kinda funny....on our anniversary I had a discussion with my hubby and said almost the exact same things to him as an explanation for why I was not going to splurge when we went out to eat. I reminded him of how many "special occasions" there have been since I started MF and where would I be now if I had cheated "just for this one occasion". The simple fact is, our lives are filled with those "special occasions". If I continue using those occasions as a reason to cheat, I will never lose weight. Instead of making food the focus on these occasions I try to stay focused on myself, the people I'm with and how much I enjoy their company. It isn't easy but I'm determined. And I know the real battle will come once I've reached goal.

I also used the alcoholic-food addict analogy during that discussion. While some of us are just social eaters, or drinkers, some of us can't stop at just ONE instance of cheating (or just one drink). Thats where the addiction thing comes in. I've been there, I know how it works. "OK, since it's a special occasion I'll have just 10 tortilla chips and salsa. Since I haven't had any carbs today I should be ok!" Next thing I know, I've almost single handedly polished off an entire basket of chips and I'm waving down the waiter for more!!! Then I'd say, "what the heck, I blew it...I'll go ahead and splurge on dinner." The next day I'd feel so bad about cheating I'd eat whatever I wanted. That's why Atkins didn't work for me in the long run. Yes, I lost some weight. But I had too many choices and I made the wrong ones. I'm a food addict.

Lisa, I agree with you 100% on how the medical field sees overweight people. Alcoholism and drug addiction are treated as a disease and obesity is considered laziness and gluttony. After 20 years of working in the medical field I've seen the discrimination in action! Just thinking about it brings back unpleasant memories I wish I could permanently banish from my mind!!! People would be surprised at what doctors say when out of earshot of their patients! I worked at a teaching hospital in the 80's and I chewed out dozens of medical students, residents and interns for their unprofessional comments about obese patients! Unfortunately I couldn't do that when I worked at private hospitals.

Ok, I've gone on long enough. Good post Lisa!