The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[mellowmom]

Grumble...grumble...grumble...

I just finished working on my first posting for this journal and when I hit submit it said "invalid session" and wiped out my posting..


grumble...grumble...grumble...


It's too late now. I tried. I'm going to bed. See you all tomorrow.


grumble..grumble...grumble....ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Unca_Tim]

Darn MM,
I hate when that happens.....
Whenever I have a long enough post, that I'm worried about losing, I always copy it to my clipboard, just in case.

That's just a highlight all, then right click and copy.
....or Ctrl+A, then Ctrl+C.

It's a good habit to get into to....

[mellowmom]

Well....Let's Give it another try... The following is a rather lengthy historical tome, so if you're easily bored and/or just interested in my Medifast journey save yourself some time and skip this post and wait for my next one which will deal with the hear and now and Medifast.

My name's Carmel and I was named after my parents' favorite little town on the California coast. (I often thank God that Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan wasn't another one of their faves!)

Was very athletic as a child and teen and never really had a weight problem until college. I remember right before my 21st birthday I decided I needed to drop a few pounds, went on WW and lost 20# in one month. (Thus conditioning me to think..."Losing weight is a cinch.. I can drop weight anytime I want to.")

Married my college sweetheart right after graduation in 1972. Fast forward 8 years and I'm the mother of 3 young sons, 6, 3 & 2. Should be a happy time, but it's not. I weighed 300 pounds and my marriage was on the rocks. Turned out all that social drinking hubby did while we were in college wasn't just a passing phase. He was an alcoholic. I felt like a doormat, depressed, tired all the time, and undeserving of any love or positive vibes. That year, however, something clicked in my brain and I decided to get my act together.

Hubby and I separated. He took a job in Oregon and the boys and I stayed in California. I joined the Diet Center and lost 80 pounds in 3 months.(See, I told you I can drop weight anytime I want to...!) DH comes down for Christmas to see the boys. He quit drinking, agreed to go to counseling and we reconcile. I feel great and look pretty good. Apparently, too good 'cuz I get pregnant with my 4th and final son. I also put back on all the weight I had lost and then some.

Still, life is good, I have my four sons, my husband, and we're financially secure, but it only lasts a couple of years. DH is diagnosed with bone cancer on his spine. The subsequent radiation treatment winds up frying his spinal cord and he wound up being paralyzed from the chest down. He spent the remainder of his life in a wheelchair. He was only 33 years old. Joe was 6'3" and around 230 pounds when he became disabled. At the time I remember thinking in the back of my head that I needed to remain heavy in order to be able to physically assist him. (I seem to have had this ability to justify my weight according to the circumstances of my life at the time.)

The cancer metastisized and Joe passed away 6 years later after waging a valiant fight against the big C. So I found myself widowed, with four young sons, at the ripe old age of 39.

Here was my thinking at that time... "Hmmm... I really need to be 'big' so I can carry that load. Plus the extra weight helps me to keep focused on my sons. No chance of any distractions with the opposite sex as long as I'm fat. Yup, weight = strength and I need all the strength I can muster right now."

Now here's the kicker...six years later I'm diagnosed with uterine cancer! The cause according to my gyn is "too much estrogen". (I remember kidding with my sons on my hospital bed that old ma was just "too much of a woman" for her own good.) I came to find out later that estrogen is stored in fat, and that my adipose tissue was probably the major contributor to my cancer. Never thought of fat as being a carcinogen! I mean, I had quit smoking because I KNEW that was a major cause....but didn't know about fat and its connection to certain cancers. So if you all need another reason to lose weight...here's a BIG one!

Well, it's 11 years later and I'm still here. Three of my four sons graduated from college. Oldest went to CalTech, #2 went to University of Michigan, and youngest graduated from Notre Dame. My 3rd son, Nick has cerebral palsy, and after graduating from high school and living at home for a few more years, recently moved to an assisted living home with other young adults. It's less than 10 miles from home, so we can visit weekly. Oldest son had his "15 minutes" of fame back in 2000 and gave me one of my proudest moments as a Mom. Second son is a bureau chief at the Detroit Free Press. He's married and has a 3 year old little girl..(light of my life...) and his wife's expecting their next, a boy, in October. Youngest married his college sweetheart after his graduation from college. He is a clinical trials coordinator at Stanford University Hospital and plans on going back to school to become a nurse practitioner.

My sons are my proudest achievement. They are just great guys, loving, caring, sensitive and fiercely protective of old ma. I feel very blessed to have been given the opportunity to encourage and help them reach their early goals, and very lucky to have them all turn out as well as they did.

So, here I am, 56 years old and finally starting to get an idea of who I am. Last year I quit my job of 25 years and embarked on a new profession. The past 12 months has been a roller coaster ride with emotions alternating between nausea and "joie de vivre". Sometimes I wonder "what was I thinking???" when I left my old job. But, then I think about how now I'm pretty much the master of my own destiny, I work from home, no one looking over my shoulder, no commute traffic, and more importantly, I have the ability to care for my 85 year old mom, who lives with me here in Gilroy, in a stressfree environment.

Well..that all for now...(And aren't you glad?!?) Next posting will deal with Medifast and how it has brought me to this point.

[DntCryLilEmoGrl]

carmel i really enjoyed reading your post. you really have gone through quite a bit and you are such a great woman, and i just bet you are so proud of your sons . i guess i have been feeling down lately but i guess i am not the only one who has had hardships in their life, and i am still young . anyways thank you for your post.

[DogMa]

I second everything everyone else said, Carmel. Thank you for sharing such an amazing story.

And BTW, as a fellow journalist, my condolences on having one for a son!

[falisamarie]

Carmel~

Your story brought me to tears. You are one strong woman who has endured so much. You deserve all the success you are having with Medifast.

Lisa

[Janae]

Carmel-

I had just read your post about the Amazing Race challenge...so i knew you were a strong and adventurous soul! But, reading your story is very inspiring...you are awesome: strong, courageous, persistent and obviously full of heart!

You have definitely challenged and encouraged many on this forum. I applaud you! I thank you.

Janae

(Can you tell us sometime about your singing...I saw you mention a choir once in a past post....also, I'm on the edge of my seat about the 15 minutes of fame.....!)

[mellowmom]

Getting ready for the trip to visit #2 son and his family on Wednesday. Flying out of Oakland to Detroit via Dallas??? (Don't you just love how airlines route passengers these days...) They haven't seen me since December so it will be interesting to get their reactions. I thought of sending them the lastest photo, but then decided to "surprise" them.

Nate called and asked me if I was going to have my L&G meal after I arrived in the Motor City? Seeing as I won't be arriving until after 6:00PM, I figured I could probably pick something up at the Dallas airport between flights. Anyone familiar with the Dallas airport know how far the "food court" is from the American Airlines terminal? Or have recommendations to where I could go for a quick L & G?

Nate also asked me what kind of extra/different foods I might need while I"m there. I told him not to worry, I can pick up what I need at the grocery store if they don't have it at home right now. Both he and his wife are heavy, and know they need to do something about it for the sake of their daughter and unborn son. I hope by showing how relatively "easy" it is to be on Medifast that it might inspire them after the baby is born to get on the plan.

The only thing they asked of me right now is not to make a big thing about what I was eating in front of Maggie. They don't want her "hung up" on the concept of being overweight. They are going to tell her that Grandma is eating special food to become more healthy. I guess it makes sense. They have been very careful with their daughter instilling good eating habits with her. She's not overweight, prefers fruits and veggies over cakes and cookies. It probably helps in that they tend to "sneak" their "treats" i.e. cakes and sweets after she's gone to bed.

I really hope they will consider MF in the near future. I know it's hard for them to battle genetics and a "Rich Midwestern" food background. My daughter-in-law is a great cook, which doesn't help right now, but can be a great help if they do go on MF. I'll wager she'll come up with some great tasting MF meals.

I'm doing some pre-packing right now. I've made a tenative "food plan" for the 7 days that I'm there. Expecting a delivery of RTD's today, and confirmed with my son that they have a "Magic Bullet". YAY...

I had hoped to have lost 60 pounds by the time I see them on Wednesday. Currently I'm at 58 pounds...don't know if I'll make it, but it'll be close. Medifast has truly changed my life, I hope to inspire my son and his family to do the same. Wish me luck.

Keep on Shakin'

Carmel

[mellowmom]

Well, I'll be offline for pretty much the whole day today. Leaving at 8:30AM for Detroit via Dallas. It will be the first "look" my son and his family will have of me since going on Medifast. The last time they saw me was at Christmas so I've lost at least 60 pounds since then! I'll let you know what their reaction (if any) will be.

Going to go see my granddaughter in her first dance recital. She's the "lead" dancer, so all the other little girls will look to her for the right movements. She's only three, the youngest in the group, but this kid's started dancing while she was still in the womb!

She sleeps in her tutu!

Which reminds me.. it's tutu late and I better go catch some zzzzzz's before I have to get up to head out to the airport.

Talk to you all later.
Carmel

[Arklahoma]

Carmel ~ I just love reading your posts. Thank you so much for sharing your life with us. Best of luck with MF and with visiting your family. Can't wait for an update!!!

[mellowmom]

Another mini NSV today. (Gosh, I LOVE Detroit! ) Plus a long boring story of a small health concern that came up this week...

Was window shopping with d-i-l when we came across a Catherine's. (I love this store, but the one in California is 70+ miles away from me.) Of course, I had to stop in and browse. Just as I was leaving one of the clerks walked by in this cute red t-shirt with Mickey Mouse's face done with silver sequins. I'm a real MM nut, so I had to get one. She took me over to where they were, and they had been pretty much picked over. There were no more red ones, however, a white one with red, white and blue sequins caught my eye. But it was only a 2x. (When I started MF I was a 4x and depending upon the cut would sometimes have to go 5x to accomodate "the Ladies"!) I muttered something under my breath that I wish there were 3x's and the sales lady heard me and said... "Oh no, this 2X should be fine. You don't look like you wear a 3X!" I could've kissed her, but instead wound up buying the shirt. When I got home and tried it on...It Fit!!

Woo Hoo. I know that Catherine's stuff runs large, but still, it was nice to be able to make that small step one size down.

So far I've been able to stay pretty much compliant. Ran into some problems the first day I arrived simply because of losing 3 hours flying to Detroit. Ran out of day and was too wiped out to stay up until 1AM EST just to have my last shake, so I skipped it.

Been going to Curves, but am experiencing some major weariness lately doing the circuit. I used to get kind of a 2nd wind after the first cycle, but now I seem to get progressively more tired plus I can't seem to get my heart rate up. Yesterday, after my workout, I went shopping at Walmart and they had one of those blood pressure machines so I tried it out. My resting heart rate was 71 but my BP was 108/61. I've never had it that low before! I was concerned because I'm taking BP medication, (purely preventitive because of my diabetes) but I'm wondering if now that my blood sugar seems to be totally under control that I may need to cutback or eliminate the BP medication. At any rate, called my doc back home. He's going to be on vacation next week but said I should come in and get looked at. He seemed pleased with the BP and said he wasn't worried about it, but wanted me to cutback on Curves for now. So I'll be seeing a doctor next Wednesday just to make sure everything is okay. The advice nurse also suggested I check my Blood Sugar when I feel that way. I've never had LOW blood sugar, so I never thought to check for it. Maybe the weight loss has opened up that possibility. Has anyone else out there experienced tiredness during/after exercise?

Getting all my meals in while on vacation seems to be my biggest problem. But I'll keep plugging along.

I think I'm going through "scale withdrawal"... As mentioned earlier son doesn't have a workable scale...and even if he did, it doesn't seem that it's possible to weigh the same on any two scales. I know we have three scales at home, and NONE of them ever match!

To be continued...

[SharonR]

Carmel congrats on the NSV! That is very cool!

I think it's normal to be tired after a work out. I havn't noticed it lately but I know the first 5 weeks on the program I would go for a walk and be tired 10 minutes into it! Hey, I was/am heavy, but could always walk and not be tired.

It's gotta be the low calorie intake. Do you drink a shake before you go or have one after? I read somewhere that if you are working out pretty hard you are suppose to have an additional suppliment.

Someone else who knows more please chime in!

[mellowmom]

One other nice thing that happened today. D-i-l and her mom took Maggie to the ice cream store for a "treat" this afternoon, and I told them I'd like to pass on the outing. My son said he'd stay back with me.

After they had left he mentioned how Michelle and commented and he noticed how much "happier" I appeared to be. (He also covered his tracks by saying..,"Not that you weren't happy before but....) I had to think about it for a moment and then had to agree. I AM happier. Is it the weight loss, or the knowledge that I'm doing something about my weight finally, or just the good vibes inside from just "feeling better", I don't know? I've noticed that I smile alot more and conversely people are smiling back more often also. Waiters at restaurants and clerks at stores just seem a little more attentive and helpful and also smile more. I think csula2000 mentioned it in her journal also. I'm just walking around with this big old dopey grin on my face most of the time. I'm sure eventually it'll wear out, but for now I'm enjoying this "happier" side of losing weight.

[Arklahoma]

Carmel ~ It's very possible that you're happier now. I've always been smiley and enthusiastic but now I'm just beaming from ear to ear constantly. I feel better and happier!!!

[mellowmom]

Getting ready to head out to the airport on my way back home from Detroit.

It's been a great week and I'm truly going to miss my son, his wife and of course, Maggie. (She of the limitless hugs, kisses and "I love You's")

I tried to stay compliant and for the most part did. May have been some miscalculations on my part on my L & G, but I did the best I could under the circumstances. (Does anyone know what the contents or nutrition breakdown of the "Bronzed" sauce in Outback's "Bronzed Tilipia"?)

The other problem was getting all my meals in. I'd forget the time and then look up and it was 10PM and I still had 3 meals to go! So I'm going home with about 6 extra packets, which disturbs me because I packed exactly enough meals for the 7 days...I obviously was missing meals and it sure added up over a week.

Been a week of some major and minor NSVs. Last one was on Sunday when I had accompanied my son and granddaughter to the booming metropolis of downtown Chesterfield and this lady asked me how old my "daughter" was! I told her I was her grandmother and she just shook her head and said, "I see the resemblance but wouldn't have guessed you were her Grandmother!"

Well, thats all for now. I'll post later when I arrive home if it's not too late and/or I'm too pooped. Good thing is at least when I'm traveling in a westward direction it doesn't take me long to get accustomed to the Pacific time zone.

Take care, all...and keep Shakin'

Carmel