Of course you're right about the skin issue, Erica, and that whole topic is nothing more than a distraction. Extra skin won't interfere with me doing my job; it won't increase my blood pressure, or mess up my hormones...And maybe it won't even happen.
But I do struggle with the idea that I want to be a regular person on regular food...buy what's on sale at the grocery store and plan nice, small, normal meals. One of Medifast's greatest benefits is also a downfall for me, because as my cravings get under control I start to think maybe I can make it in the outside world.
Maybe I can have a bowl of Cheerios for breakfast and go off and live a healthy day of tiny meals of whatever everyone else is having and be slim again, too...
I've got to come to terms with the fact that I wasn't able to do it over the course of the past three years, even though I tried very, very hard. It's time to try something else, and this is something that did work for me in the past.
Maybe after seven or eight months on Medifast or even a year, and possibly through the maintenance program, I will train myself to be my dream-version of Mavesse. Maybe that's the ticket; looking at this life of food from an envelope as a temporary means to an end, and enjoying it as a blessed relief from the obsession that got me into this mess in the first place.
Anyway, I should get something in me, because I've been awake, thinking for nearly two hours now, and I haven't even had a drink of water. That's just setting myself up for failure.
As one of my professor's in teachers' college used to say (several times a day), "Structure for success!"
Have a good day, friends. Thanks so much for stopping by