The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Lisa Renee]

The way I look at it: If I am not attracted to myself, how can I expect others to be? I AM NOT happy being overweight. Some people are, and more power to em! I do not think I am attractive physically the way that I am. Does that mean I think I am not a good person or worth knowing? NO. I know who I am on the inside and although I can always improve on that part, I am okay with the inside. I do not like what is on the outside. I have some magor work to do... I have good personal hygiene etc., and I am not an albatross for heaven sakes. However, I totally understand that if I was single, guys wouldn't be beating down my door. To be honest, would I be persuing a man that was morbidly obese? Not too sure. Even if he was a great guy, there has to be some physical attraction. Although this might sound vain, I am not attracted to overweight men. I could be a good friend etc., but I can't help it if I don't desire that type of man. I get blasted when I tell other women this because they usually think I am saying that it's ok to discriminate against overweight people. That is not what I am saying. There is a difference between respect and attraction. I expect respect, but I do not expect a man to be a attracted to me when I know deep down I wouldn't be attracted to a morbidly obese man. Which brings me to my point: It's okay to loose for love if you are trying to loose it to love yourself more!

What you look like on the outside isn't always a reflection of who you are on the inside; however, how you take care of yourself physically has a lot to do with who you are on the INSIDE. Make sense?

Luvs

[MissyK]

Very interesting posts.

I hope I don't bring anyone down with what I'm about to say.

One of my main reasons for losing weight, aside from my upcoming dance competitions, is my hopes of winning back my ex.

He used to go on about how much he liked my figure. Actually, I think we broke up because I started to put on weight.
I got too insecure to be with him. He said it was ok, but I started to hate myself too much to love him.

I don't EVER want to go through that pain again. I'm losing for love.

[mytime]

WOW Tox - I am rigth there with you. My computer crashed so I have been off line - will have it back Saturday but can see I have missed a lot. How many things have each of us thought we could have done better, sooner or avoided b/c of weight. I would like to say it is an obstical in our own minds more so than in the real world but if you even take a peek at the Social Psychology literature it is all there in black and white. People discriminate all of the time re: people being overweight. It is not in our minds - I too think wow when I look like or weigh x I can see or do Y. The bottom line is we need to love ourselves and I hope like heck I get a chance in this lifetime to get to thinville so I have some perspective. From everything I have read thin is way better and we are all on our way !!!! Thanks for such inspiring posts. Lose for love, lose for work, lose for health but most of all lose for you - not as a conformist not as a sell out but as someone who deserves the very best life has to offer and has the health to enjoy it. Mytime

[ladyhawke]

Yoohoo Toxsiq how's it going?

Sung to the tune of "The Way We Were"

Memories of the fat we left behiiiiiinnnnnnddd......
Cheesecake we gave to one another.................
Of the way were werrrrrrrrrre.......
Scattered pictures that needed a wide-angle lense..........
Pictures we would never show to anotheeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrr......
Of the way we were.........
Can it be that it was all so simple then to just call Ms Nancy and order a big ol' box of MF and then whip it in our Magic Bullettttttttttttt......
If we had the chance to do it all again.......
Tell me would we..........
Could we.......
(You'd better believe it)

[Lisa in NY]

Ladyhawke, what a riot - I love your parody!!!

Lisa

[ladyhawke]

Love bump

Toxi how u doin?

[armeewyf]

Man...there are so many posts on this thread that I can relate to! I may as well add my confessionals...

I have been heavy since HS, maybe a little before. I have gained weight, lost weight, you know the cycle. I always had the chalenge to myself...well, if I lost weight I could _____________ (fill it in!)...but a lot of the time it was to get THAT GUY. I know thats wrong, people should like you for what you are and who you are. But it IS a good motivator.

Now I am married. I met my husband when I weighed 230, give or take. He never said one thing about my weight. I gained some when we dated and by the time I got pregnant with Kendra I weighed 260. My highest weight just before Kendra came was 340. He never said a word. I am off track a little but going back to dating, I avoided meeting his family like the plague because of my weight. I took him around mine but that was different. About 5 months into dating his brother died and I had to meet the family. STRAWBERRY...I don't know how you avoided it for so long!

When I met my husband, I was in the "I don't care" phase. Not looking for a boyfriend, almost didn't go to the initial "meet" (we were set up by a mutual friend). Maybe it was the I don't care attitude that made it work. I didn't pretend (you know how we are always on our BEST behaviour when we meet and start to date!).

So, who do I avoid now? HS friends, old work friends, etc. When I go to FL to visit I always have an excuse not to get together with my HS friends. I just want them to see a new and improved me. Not the overweight girl from HS. I didn't go to the 20 year reunion. But you can believe I WILL be at the next one, which I hope is 25. I am doing so well on MF. When I get to my goal, I will never look back to what I was. I also NOW feel kind of self conscious when I meet my husbands work friends for the first time. I also used to avoid his work functions like the plague. I looked at myself yesterday in the mirror, dresed in my 2 sizes smaller clothes and realized I am not nearly as heavy as I THINK. I do believe it will take a long time for me to get out of that mindset...I just remember how I felt at 300 or close to it and its gonna be a while for me to realize I am not at that weight anymore.

LADYHAWKE-no one is too good for you.

Just my thoughts...
Lee Ann

[Elimatal]

Hey Tox! Don't feel bad, I have a similar situation to yours---I have a wonderful male friend--we've been close friends since we were 9 years old, and we both reached our 30 year "milestone" this year. He calls me out of the blue as well, and he's always there when I need him. We got to visit each other last September after going 15 years without seeing one another. I live in Maryland, and he is in New Hampshire. Again, nothing romantic, just really close friends. He wanted to visit me this year, and like you, I blew him off. I have gained almost 100 pounds since he was here last year (went through a rough divorce and custody battle), and I was ashamed for him to see me as big as I have become. Like you, I know he would never judge me, but I still wanted him to see me thin, as I used to be. Although I didn't start this MF diet specifically for him, once the weight has come off, I am planning an extended road trip up to New Hampshire to visit him. Good luck on your weight loss journey, and I know that you will feel so good to be able to have your friend see the new and improved you!