The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

Toxsiq · by **Toxsiq** » September 28th, 2005, 4:07 pm

Ok I know this is SO wrong, but I was having a really hard time getting back on the medifast plan because I took last Sunday off. But today I got a call from an old friend. We've been friends for 10 years but I haven't SEEN him for like 8 years! He moved away and he's always kept in touch. Sometimes once or twice a year, sometimes every other year, but I've gained so much wieght that I always make excuses to not be able to see him when he comes into town. I know it's WRONG. He stays persistant though. And I'm not an especially unsecure person, but when it comes to him, I just lose it. And it's not like we've ever been romantically linked! and I wasn't skinny last time we hung out, I've just gained so much more since then. I'm ashamed. And I've never been ashamed when it comes to anyone, and it's NOT because he's judgemental, he's always been 1000% my friend because he loves me. But it's because we get along so well that I just wish I could lose weight and win his heart. I don't know. We have such a strong connection that never gets lost. I swear on my life, if I think about him out of the blue I know he will call me, and he ALWAYS does. I thought about him yesterday in the shower and he called tonight. We haven't talked since February. I don't know why I'm rambling here, but I just feel like a weak person for being better on a diet because it might make a guy happy. I'm NOT that girl, and I'm acting like THAT girl who changes for a guy. Maybe I am that girl. Ugh.... But he's SO cute

Anyways, long story short, I'm back on the wagon and going strong.

oxoxox Tox

dlr2424 · by **dlr2424** » September 28th, 2005, 4:51 pm

Toxsiq..... :no:

....no need to apologize for rambleing..... :huh:

...sometimes a reason like yours is a good way to begin a weight loss plan and once on track you could then revaluate your reason for losing..... :scratchhead:

....being ashamed is a human emotion.....however your friend is missing out on the joy of being with you and seeing you..........we put so much on "HOLD" for the day we are going to be perfect or presentable....

....I know I have wasted soooooooo many years hiding in an unhappy body.......putting off so much for when I lose weight.... :aarggh:

...shame on me...........God gave me the tools to do what I need to do to succeed.... :coach:

...it is up to me to USE them properly.........Life is so short.. :yes:

...We really need to LIVE it..........not just exsist..... :bouncie:

....but get the most out of each day we are blessed with........SOOOOOOOOO....... :treadjog:

...stay on track....

..lose the weight....... :secret:

... and make a date to see him when he's in town ..... :hmmm:

...you never know what's in store for you..........LET"S GET IT DONE............a fullfilled life is so much better than any food could taste

Donna....dlr2424

Toxsiq · by **Toxsiq** » September 28th, 2005, 7:35 pm

Wow...thank you

You REALLY made me feel better.

Lisa in NY · by **Lisa in NY** » September 29th, 2005, 10:09 am

Oh Toxsiq, this is nothing new....!
I lost a bunch of weight when I was in high school because I was DETERMINED to go to my senior prom with the guy of my dreams (at the time)....it WAS good motivator because I lost about 40 lbs. in no time!

Never went to the prom for different reasons, but I lost the weight - and that was more important!!!

Having been overweight since childhood, then losing weight in high school and staying at my goal through my early 20's, I've lived in "both sides" of the world in relation to weight. I can tell you that losing weight is worth EVERY MINUTE of dieting to get there! The confidence you gain is unbelievable and makes a HUGE difference in your life. YOU will be the one calling HIM to set up meetings, believe me (if you have time in between all your other dates of course)!

Lisa

Lisa Renee · by **Lisa Renee** » September 29th, 2005, 12:49 pm

Tox, you are completely normal. I almost didn't get married because of my weight. I have put everything off, you would not even belive me if I told you some of the things I have put off in the last 10 years because of my weight! Don't tell anyone, but I have never met my inlaws because of my weight! Ooops, did I say that outloud? It's true. I have dodged ever gathering for almost 10 years because I am ashamed. That will be changing this next year and that is a huge step for me.

I DO NOT think it is wrong to loose weight because you will be more attractive. I DO NOT think it is wrong to loose weight because it might make your spouse etc., more happy. BUT, and here is the key, you must do it for yourself above all, or you will never keep the weight off. It is making my spouse very happy that I am loosing weight. We are even more affectionate towards one another, but it isn't because he didn't love me and now he does. It is because we both see a healthy future in which I will finally be able to do the fun things we have always talked about doing. That does a lot to boost things. Love must be there first though, and it sound like you and he care a lot for one another. Wanting to look nice for him is not bad, however, make sure you are doing it for yourself too, because YOU ARE WORTH IT JUST AS MUCH AS HE IS!!! Keep us updated!

ladyhawke · by **ladyhawke** » September 29th, 2005, 1:34 pm

Girl, you are so not alone, I am in the same boat, originally I wanted to lose weight because I didn't want to be fat at my son's First Communion and now there is another reason I don't want to go into on cyberspace, our Nancy knows the story, but it is for a beautiful man who I think is way too good for me!

I am almost at fighting weight and I can't wait to get dressed up again and look nice instead of covering my body with any old thing that fits.
Good Luck, you can do it, we will do it together.

dlr2424 · by **dlr2424** » September 29th, 2005, 1:48 pm

Oh Ladyhawke.............breath deep........NO ONE.........NO ONE........NO ONE.........(get my point).......I REPEAT.... :coach:

...NO ONE is to good for YOU.........that is only a frame of mind that you are pocessing.....YOU ARE SPECIAL............and have SOOOOOOOOO much to offer someone............remember God creates us all the same and I'm sure you have many gifts to offer......pray for SELF WORTH........I know I could use some as well............take care & keep shakin

Donna....dlr2424

ladyhawke · by **ladyhawke** » September 29th, 2005, 1:52 pm

Thank you sweetie, right back attcha!

Sung to the tune of "Looking for Love"

"Losing for Love"
In all the right places
Losing for love
To see only 1 chhh---in...
Losing for Love
To buy those jeans I want to fit innnn..
Another MF'r
Losing for Love

Lisa Renee · by **Lisa Renee** » September 29th, 2005, 3:02 pm

aww, that was sooo cute! You ARE worth knowing!

betz · by **betz** » September 29th, 2005, 3:53 pm

The saddest part of being overweight (besides the obvious health issues) is the way we cheat ourselves out of life experiences. I'm guilty of avoiding people, social occasions, job interviews--you name it--because I felt uncomfortable about my weight.

It doesn't take much to make a person painfully self critical. A cruel word from one person is enough to do it.

This is something I'm thinking a lot about now because it's the real thing I want to change.

Maybe you're like me. Do you remember when you were a child and you were strong and had big ideas, dreams...definite opinions, brave days when you climbed to the very top of a tree or got up in front of the class to show a project with complete pride in what you'd done?

I think about that and I wonder..where did that kid go?

I want to have that spirit again and I'm not going to spend the rest of my life hiding her under a basket (of extra weight or anything else).

I'm tired of not finishing things, putting things off, waiting to be a certain weight so that I can do this, that, or the other thing. When I debated spending the money on Medifast (let's face it--it's an investment), I told myself that...okay... If it's really the weight that's keeping me from living my life, I'll get rid of it. Once and for all, I'll fix that problem. Then I'll have no excuses.

THAT is the thing I really have to face. No excuses to "hide" or to "put off til" or to "just be quiet".

I think it will be a real adventure--and maybe a scary one at times. At least, though, I won't be wasting the one gift we all have in common.
Life.

dlr2424 · by **dlr2424** » September 29th, 2005, 4:02 pm

Betz.............what a beautiful post............thank you....... :hug:

.........

Donna.....dlr2424

mama2benandrachel · by **mama2benandrachel** » September 29th, 2005, 5:57 pm

Oh BOY can I relate Tox! :roll:

When I was 18, I fell MADLY in love with my best friend since childhood. We were JUST friends. We went everywhere together. Then I made the mistake of telling him how I felt. Bill was a jock and I was ALWAYS fat, but back then, in high school, I weighed around 200-220 lbs. For 5' 9", that's only 40-60 lbs. overweight! Compared to now, I was skinny! Anyway, after I told him I loved him, I got "THE TALK". I'm sure a lot of you know what I mean by "THE TALK"! Bill told me, "I love you, but I'm not IN LOVE with you"! Talk about crushed! :cry:

Well, he went into the Air Force, and I proceeded to lose 60 lbs. I kept it off for 2 1/2 years, met and fell in love with my husband, even though I had gained back about half of the weight, Fred thought I was the sexiest thing going! Right after I started going with Fred, Bill came home on leave. I think Bill realized that he blew it, but he covered it up by telling friends that "he really cared about me, if only I would lose the weight!" There will always be a part of me that still thinks about "what if", but you know what? I am SOoooo much better than Bill, and he is the one who lost me, not me losing him! Plus, I've been with my husband for 24 years, and at 45 years old, I am doing this for my kids, my husband, but especially for ME!!!!!!!!!!! It has to be for YOU FIRST! I still want to throw it in Bill's face after I get down to my goal, just to rub it in his face!!!!!!!!!!!

ladyhawke · by **ladyhawke** » September 29th, 2005, 6:47 pm

My Italian grandfather used to say so eloquently:
"If people don't like you the way you are, the hell with them"

Well he was never overweight and we do lose the weight for health issues and for our self-esteem.

Forgive me but I feel another song coming on:

Sung to the tune of "What I Did for Love" from Annie

Kiss the fat goodbyeeeeeee...
And point me toward the smaller sizes...
We knew what we had to dooooo....
Don't forget....can't regret...What I did for looove.....

mama2benandrachel · by **mama2benandrachel** » September 29th, 2005, 7:10 pm

Ladyhawke, you are too funny!!!!!!!!! :roll:

Toxsiq · by **Toxsiq** » September 29th, 2005, 9:07 pm

ladyhawke wrote:My Italian grandfather used to say so eloquently:
"If people don't like you the way you are, the hell with them"

You know that's awesome. I've always been pretty cool with myself, I just have a big problem with the way people treat me for being fat. I don't think I'd notice that much if it weren't for other people judging and whatnot. I think that's why I get so angry about losing weight because I feel torn between being true to myself and doing something to please other people. But I came to realize that I can still dislike the prejudices of the general population without sabotaging myself with unhealthy behaviours.

Right on? Right on. :mrgreen:

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