The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[nickieluv]

And I won't mention the old one, either. Totally on the Q-T. On the down-low. Or whatever the kids say these days, I'm so out of touch!!

[Karli]

*warning, I am *extremely* sleepy*

In any event, today was hard . Not physically, and I stayed the course just splendidly, it was just mentally and emotionally that was difficult. Letting the full gravity of my current weight sink in is *something* and I know that some of you have conqured the scale, but I simply haven't. I just don't like weighing 200 pounds, I just don't like it. And, that mixed with my problematic body image have given me a different set of "pieces" to deal with in this game. I have just been a little amazed at myself for once again being under the impression that I was doing better than I actually was, when in reality my belly was getting bigger and bigger, and now that I know how much I actually weigh, I can feel it and I can't stand it. I was trying to convince myself otherwise for quite a while.

I have two shows coming up this weekend, and two serious rehearsals before that, on Thursday and Friday. I am stressed about that and exhausted, and I just get so munchy feeling when I am like that. I did have an olive snack, but that's it !

Loads of water today, too ! Well, cheers to all ! I don't think I'm going to delete this thread.

[nickieluv]

We all kid ourselves. No one WANTS to weigh 200 pounds or more - at least no one under 7 feet tall I imagine - so how else do we get there if not by convincing ourselves that we're just not all that big in reality?

I feel your stress and I hope you can find a way through it intact. Maybe munch on celery, or something sugar free, as a lesser evil if you can't avoid snacking entirely? As far as rehearsals and shows go, though, I'm certain you can do it and very well at that. No doubt in my mind.

[Karli]

Thank you, Nickie ! Down another pound from yesterday and ready (more or less) to face the day. I moved my ticker back to 200 so when I reach my final goal, I can be in the 40 pound club ... hee hee. I figure over the past two weeks I was at least .2 pounds more than I was yesterday morning, so I get to count it .

Anyway, cheers to all today !

[nickieluv]

Well, if we're doing that nowadays, I'd like to move my ticker to 265. With my goal as 145, then I'd get into the 120# club. And my true highest was 278 so it's not really cheating, right?

Just teasing. I totally get what you're doing and for two tenths of a pound the Monk in me highly approves. Plus 200 is a much nicer, rounder number. No pun intended, if you glean one from that.

[Karli]

Well, all I know is that when I reach my final goal, if two tenths of a pound kept me from being in the 40# club, then that's silly ! If I weighed myself on Sunday morning instead of Monday, then the scale would have *at least* matched the minor, intellectual adjustment. PLUS, the fact that I was willing to start from *zero* in my pound club is worthy of two tenths of a pound !

My mantra for the day :

[nickieluv]

Agreed. Can't wait till you're crossing that 40-pound finish line.

As for water - I wish I could convince myself that SF drink mix counted as water. I know it doesn't, but I wish it did! Darn artificial sweeteners....

[nickieluv]

Hope you can swim!!!!

[Karli]

ha ha, Nickie, you're a funny girl .

Today was a great day eating-wise ! Not even difficult mentally or emotionally. I WILL say that I am out of bars though, and I can't WAIT for my new order of them to arrive !!! It's not due until next Monday though . My life is heading into some kind of pre-concert mentality, where it's as though a plane is taking off or something, and time is beginning to stop. How do'ya like that ? "Time is beginning to stop" ... I just made that one up. Good one, eh ? . Okay, I am just being silly now . Anyway, the concerts feel as though they are just sucking me towards them ... fffffwwwwweeeeuuuuppppp !

Hubby and I are planning a yummy dinner on Sunday after my shows are over, made with none other than our new steamer . We are going to get some seafood, which I LOVE, and we almost never get. I can't wait !

Water intake was great today, too. Getting this big, giant water bottle was the best move I think I have ever made in my entire life ... okay, now I am just being silly again ... hee hee.

Goodnight !

[nickieluv]

Thanks for the giggles - and the reminders to go buy another water bottle. It's almost midnight and I'm still on the computer, naughty me - but I'm going to bed now I swear!!

[Karli]

You're welcome for the giggles, Nickie !

Down another pound this morning, weighing in for the day at 197.8. It's strange that for a scale who measures to the tenth of a pound, that I have lost *exactly* one pound each of the last days ! 195 is feeling near . It's also strange that each morning I wake up and think, "I don't feel like I've lost any weight, be prepared to face that on the scale, Karli" and then to have lost a pound. I imagine that part of that "trip-out" is just because I am actually facing the scale at all, but if I wasn't, I would probably be convincing myself that I am ready for size 10's ... hee hee. Okay, there's no way I would be able to get that one even past myself .

Cheers to all and have an MF-rockin' kinda day !

[katieb920]

Good for you Karli. You can really tell that you are in the zone. I am still not convinced about the bars. For some reason I keep thinking that I am not going to lose if I eat 5 of them. That is so cool about the steamer I love fresh seafood. UMMM YUMMMMM

[Karli]

Hi Ladies ! Thanks for the support and for stopping by . I do feel as though I am 'in the zone' and a LARGE part of that is just having the proper motivation ! Even this week is a lot different than the last couple of weeks were, as I am growing in motivation.

Don't have a lot to report today other than the fact that I am feeling pretty good, I am actually just really loving the feeling of getting healthier and lighter and cleaner with all of the water I have been drinking. It just feels great ! Right now I am just lovin' the program .

Cheers !

[nickieluv]

I love it when it finally feels that way. Hell getting there sometimes, though. Send me some of your strength if you can spare it.

[Karli]

Well, Nickie, "strength" about and around food is not one of my leading characteristics, at least it hasn't been for years, otherwise I guess I wouldn't be in this place of needing to lose 40 pounds (AGAIN ). So, I don't feel I am particularly strong, per se, I am just motivated. Part of that motivation right now is that I am tired of how the past couple of years have felt for me. When I first lost all of my weight, I was trying to make some life-changes, too, but I wasn't truly ready, I don't think, to face everything. These last couple of years have been difficult in many ways emotionally, and then that has involved excessive eating. And, it's not even like there has been what people would label as "severe" stuff ... it's been severe enough to me, but even as simple as feeling confused about what to do with my life and these things. The bottom line though is that I freaked out when I hit 161 the first time around, I was doing really, really well for a while when I was devoting so much time to excercising, but then life demanded something else from me and I just couldn't get myself back in the saddle because I was confused, afraid, and I also just forgot what it feels like to be motivated like this and to be taking care of myself in this way.

Anyway, that is probably more than you bargained for ... hee hee... but, this IS my journal afterall, so I think I'll let my story be .

Down another pound and two tenths this morning, weighing in at 196.6 for the day, and I have my big giant water bottle ready to go. I have been getting in about 3 of those a day, or even a little more.

3 x 64 oz =