The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[dede4wd]

Ditto what Lizabette said.

That silver fox is wise!

D

[Karli]

Thanks for chiming in, DeDe .

Well, things are going pretty well here in my own little MFland. Today has been absolutely fantastic program-wise. I like my current 2 week challenge with myself, and I am deciding to focus only on these two weeks and not worry about what's going to happen once I get to the end of it. I have a special little calendar that I am using just for this, and at the end of each day I am going to put a big "X" on it to count it off. And, I have decided that I am going to go absolutely snackless, it just seems like I do better that way.

I have even surprised myself yesterday and today by getting down some of the MF stuff I have had in my shelf for months now, but couldn't bring myself to face. I am currently eating some chili, though I made it as though it were soup (and this is WAY tastier to me like this) and I actually had a strawberry shake this morning.

I am thinking about 6-0ing it today, but we'll see. Two more meals yet and I am "patiently" awaiting my new shipment to arrive today. I have been ridiculously looking hopefullly out the window everytime I hear a car of pretty much any kind, but especially when I hear one that sounds like it could be UPS. My new shipment will bring me more oatmeal (I *really* miss my MF oatmeal), more bars, more RTD's, more of lots of stuff. More of my favorites . So, yeah, I am kinda looking forward to it.

Anyway, seeing the scale get itself back in order... hee hee. Still need to see some bloat go away but I am happy to be getting there.

One little comment... I actually have been so happy to be able to return to my MF.


Cheers,
Karli

[Karli]

The bloat is going away .

I have to gather up a costume for a couple of characters that I am going to be playing in my next Opera things. One is a power-tripping secretary that refuses everybody's visa into the country --The Consul by Menotti-- yeah, I just really have a difficult time getting into that role . The other is a governess who, in her nighty, scares off a ghost -- Turn of the Screw by Britton.

So, I went to the local goodwill and started trying things on that seemed like possibilities for the secretary. Hee hee... I even fit into some petites, so, I am not sure what "petite" means, but that was cool. Anyway, it was fun though I didn't find anything that really represented the look I am going for (read : HOT ). It was great to feel like I could fit into most of those things that are made for women (not children ). Anyway, I will have to go somewhere else to find what I am looking for, but it's such a good feeling knowing that I am mainly looking for style and not just for something that will fit around my bluddy butt and all.

My most recent project : To discern and appreciate the difference(s) between something that is "difficult" vs something that is "impossible."

I just kinda realized that I often mistake these two for each other and, sometimes just because something is difficult, I think it's impossible, and therefore I give up. Well, that's weird. Part of what makes it difficult (whatever it is) is thinking it's impossible -- when actually it's not.

So, my biggest goal is actually to discern what is truly impossible, and maybe that list is actually very short. If it's just difficult, I simply have to suck it up and weather it instead of giving in because I lose hope and think it's impossible. hee hee. Well, okay, this is me.


Cheers,
Karli

[Karli]

hummmmdeee dumdeeeee... just taking some time today to journal. The bulk of my day starts in about 2 hours and doesn't end for nine hours after that, so, I am taking the morning to myself a bit.

Something new I have been experimenting with, and love, is thinking of my meal plan and eating as though I were at the mercy of a cafeteria. Once the menu is made for the day, I don't have a choice about what's on it, I just have to show up when the meal is being served and eat what "they" are serving me -- and in the proportions they serve it -- no more, no less.

This is good for me. And, I will eat from this cafeteria now through March 11th. I have spent a bit of time in the past setting out what I am going to eat for the day, but then I would change it up depending on my mood and so on, when the time came. Well, as with before MF, nothing really satisfies that. I could never find the right food to satisfy what I felt I needed, I couldn't find it mentally before I ate, and I couldn't find it physically while I ate. DANGER ZONE for me. However, having a schedule and a plan for the day that I stick to somehow gives me more satisfaction about eating than any one meal or flavor.

This all goes along with my recent realizations that food and eating is one of those things that I should not worry about (still shifting, though). I have better things to focus on, better things to spend my energy on during the day and in my life.

Anyhoo, I have also realized that I can still get excited about a meal. For a long time, probably even before MF, I thought I wasn't allowed to. But, now I am going to let myself. It's just I get excited about it within constraints. I see what's on the menu for the day, and I get excited about that meal. Like, my new favorite L/G -- a turkey burger lightly fried in a spritz of olive oil, with a few onions in the pan (I know, I know, but I ate them before the rule change and experienced lots of success still), a bit of catsup, and a yummy side salad. It's great . That's being served at 1 o'clock today, and I just have to show up and enjoy it (well, and make it, too, but it's pretty darn easy !!).

Anyway, cheers.

Karli

[nickieluv]

Karli;

I'm glad you like what you're serving! Did your new order come in today? Then it will be like you have a personal chef instead of a cafeteria - one who knows what you like and knows how to make it healthy for you.

Enjoy your L&G. And I hope you find your inner sexy secretary and the right clothes for her soon.

[Karli]

Yeah, my new order came and I was *SO* excited . But, I had a bar incident the day the order came (Monday evening), and that is what spurred me on to thinking about my food and eating as revolving around a cafeteria. In my mind, the place is closed except for the hours my little menu and schedule for the eating-day says it's open. Plus, I am only going to eat my bars at a time when I can't let it trip me up and trigger me (so, times like when I am away from the house or in the middle of teaching).

Anyway, almost the entire bloat is gone now (this bloat was a doozey) and I am reminding myself that I am on a two-week compliance challenge and not a "see how much weight I can lose" challenge. So, I go until March 11th no matter what numbers show throughout the days.

So, my inner secretary is going to go (cheapo) shopping today. My problem is that I like really nice clothing, made with silks and fine fabrics. I really have to be careful with that because that stuff adds up FAST !! So, I am making myself try to get some "snazy" without breaking our bank. And, thank goodness, everything looks better on me now than when I was 70 pounds heavier .


Cheers,
Karli

[nickieluv]

I was actually just talking with my sister the other day about this subject - how thin people can get clothes so much cheaper. Thrift stores and things, I'm thinking, can be really fun when you're thin, because the majority of the world is outgrowing and getting rid of their THIN clothes, not their fat clothes. I have seen designer labels at the Salvation Army tons of times - but I stopped going there because there was nothing attractive in my size at all. I want to buy a really nice outfit for $2 - just because I can. I think that would be cool.

So here's to spending $2 today! That won't break the bank!

[Karli]

I have really been enjoying my little eating calendar and thinking the way that I have been about meals (in the past couple of days). I have been planning ahead, but then I have been also sticking to my plan, which I haven't done since my earliest MF days. It's really satisfying and comforting for me and I am convinced it's the only way to go for me with this.

So, I was thinking about my whole freaking out thing about going off the fat burning part of the program and how I was sad (and scared) about it coming to an "end" soon. But, I realized that I can keep the same exact kind of stucture, the same frame of mind, the same little calendar (and now I get little stickers on each date that I was compliant ) when I am in transition and in maintenance. And, these are the types of things I am "compliant" to, I am compliant to a frame of mind that affects my practice and my actions in a specific way.

Just where I am at for now. I guess I need to be pretty militant with myself about all of this (at least for now) in order to experience the kind of success I really want. And, I am willing to do that for myself, because I am worth it. Maybe sometimes it will be difficult, but this is something that is not impossible , then it can be done and I can do it.

Cheers,
Karli

[Lizabette]

WTG, KARLI!!!

[Tawanda]

Karli, I enjoy reading your journal posts. You are doing a lot of thinking about the process of getting to goal weight and I keep seeing little bits and pieces in your writing that I can relate to or makes me think "I need to figure this out, too". You are so close to goal and I'm excited for you.

[bikipatra]

I was actually just talking with my sister the other day about this subject - how thin people can get clothes so much cheaper. Thrift stores and things, I'm thinking, can be really fun when you're thin, because the majority of the world is outgrowing and getting rid of their THIN clothes, not their fat clothes. I have seen designer labels at the Salvation Army tons of times - but I stopped going there because there was nothing attractive in my size at all. I want to buy a really nice outfit for $2 - just because I can. I think that would be cool.

So here's to spending $2 today! That won't break the bank!

Places like H&M and Forever 21 have the cutest hip clothes for thin people at cheap prices and I can't wait to be able to shop there! I want something designed by Madonna!

[Karli]

Thanks, Lizabette for your kind support . And, thanks Tawanda for stopping by and posting . I am happy to know that maybe my crazy thoughts are perhaps not completely as crazy as they seem sometimes to me.

Hi, Biki

So, I weighed in below ticker at 4:30am this morning. I am up early today (woke up a little after 3 am) because I am restless and I have these bluddy Operas going through my head. I don't think I am going to be getting back to sleep so pretty soon I will just accept that and make myself a cup of coffee and do quiet things like sorting laundary, cleaning my office, reading, and listening to music through my headphones so as to get stuff done without waking the hubbinator.

Well, speaking of Opera scenes, I did indeed find myself a secretary outfit. I think it's pretty hot. But, what I really care about all that is that when I was shopping yesterday I realized how much I love clothes and fashion and these things that I have not paid any attention to for years... and suddenly I want to get a whole new wardrobe . Well, okay, I actually have a genuine need since I truly only have one pair of pants that is non-sweatpants to my name, and that is a pair of blue jeans that will barely stay on me anymore. That is fairly respresentative of what the rest of my wardrobe is like .

So, amidst my opera-singing head, my thoughts went to different articles of clothing I want to have in my new wardrobe, most of it will be lower cost for now, with maybe one or two really wonderful pieces, but I will try to get stuff that I can still make look really good. I am going through a process in my life of needing to help people around me see me as I am... hee hee. And, I have realized that some more professional type clothing might help to represent me a little better.

Also, though, while I was shopping I realized that I really do still have until my goal weight to go. And, I am just not happy with my butt ... where the butt meets the thigh in the back... it could just be better. That may be solved by working out, but working out is something that I am still going to put off until I am getting into transition and maintenance. Anyway, that was motivating for me to stay on track, actually. When all you have to wear is rags and bags, it doesn't do much for an accurate sense of where one is going with fashion, general maintenance in that area, and presentation in that way. I get it now.

I added a shake this morning since I woke and am up at the crack, feeling nervous about my rehearsal this evening. Tonight is the run through and anything that is not up to par gets scratched from the program. I have worked really, really hard on my stuff and want to do really well tonight. Plus, the director for this program is the new artistic director for the local Opera company here. I want to make a good impression on her.

Anyway, cheers !!

Karli

[katieb920]

Karli,
Congrats with staying uder the ticker. Good Luck with your rehearsal tonight. I know what you are talking about shopping. I love to shop. My husband and I have so many clothes right now that I think I am going to half to buy another dresser. I love reading your post you always have such much energy.

Katie

[Karli]

Hi, Katie, thanks for stopping in and commenting, I always just love that !!


Okay, some serious excitement is about to ensue :

OMG !! WHAT HAS MY PROBLEM BEEN ???????

Well, I will say that I feel more motivated now than I have been in a LONG time ! If you have any doubts about what you are doing on this program, push through, push through, push through until you don't have those doubts anymore (that land does exist for YOU TOO)!

I got lost in some kind of "no-man's-land" after I hit about 40 pounds gone. Why ? Because the freshness of the program wore off, the super quick results right off the bat faded, I couldn't tell a huge difference in my appearence from 10 pounds to the next 10 pounds gone, I lost my motivation (or so I thought), and eventually I let temptation and apathy take over. I let the winter bother me, yadda yadda.

But, today I went (minor-kind) clothes (and SHOES) shopping and I have *never* been so proud to not need size 16s and above (16 was the last size I was willing to purchase for myself though I am guessing I was probably up around 24-26 if I had actually bought clothes for myself at that point) and to walk right by them knowing that they just wouldn't fit !! And, you will feel that, too !! You will get there !!

Today I bought size 12 jeans, I would like to reach size 10s, but I will take these for now (because I look really good in them ). I can't even explain it but I will say that all of my motivation for what I am doing came flooding back. I am *SO* happy that I dragged myself through (and got support from you all while doing it) the hard times, it is so worth it !! It is *nothing but* worth it !!

Okay. I don't know, maybe I will have some hard times ahead, but I am going to go put on some new clothes right now and I think that will keep me honest.

A piece of advice : I did not buy myself anything new along the way. One reason was that we are not rolling in the dough around here and I knew that if I stuck with the program, I would shrink out of my new clothes (so I thought it would be a waste of money). But, I think it would've helped me more than letting my clothes get way too big for me and then just sitting around swimming in them. So, get yourself new things along the way. I think it's like getting another foot or hand-hold on your way up an ice-berg.

Now, time for my very strictly portioned L/G . HURRAY !


Karli

[dede4wd]

Karli,
It was a joy to read this happy post from yoU! I also agree that even if I'm getting them at Savers, new (to me) clothes that FIT are so great for the motivation...people can't compliment us on our progress if they can't see us swimming in our old clothes!

So glad you had a good shopping day!

DeDe