The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[nickieluv]

Jungle dress huh? I assume that doesn't mean like a leather teddy a la Jane of the Jungle.

[Karli]

ha ha ... no, no leather teddy ! It is actually a silk and lace dress, with some subtle leopard print, the dress in shades of gold, cranberry, orangish, redish and browns. It may not sound great, but it's actually incredibly beautiful and it seems nearly as though it were made just for me ! I bought it a couple of years ago (I *think* it was that long ago !) when I was thinner and bought myself some clothing as a reward. That is one reason I was happy to fit into it and look decent, actually !

WOOT ! Down to 186.8 this morning, and that was in the 5am hour ! I am pretty happy about that weigh in and I am feeling truly ready to be losing some more. It's strange, it's difficult for me to imagine what it must have felt like to be 10 and even 20 pounds more than I am now (which I probably was about 20 pounds more when I returned several months ago) ... I am feeling like I am getting slimmer for sure, and weighing more than I am now seems like I must have felt VERY uncomfortable ... but, I didn't ! I mean, I didn't like it and I felt self-conscious, but I was convincing myself that it wasn't *that* bad ... you know ?

I am feeling slimmer now, but I still have a good 20 pounds to go ! At some point, I will be looking back 10 pounds down from now, wondering how I could have felt like I was getting more comfortable !

Anyway, MF rocks !

[nickieluv]

I just can't imagine that feeling. I don't think I've lost enough yet to have that feeling, though. I think it's just a product of how quickly I forget where I've come from. It makes it much too easy to go back there. I'll have to work on that.

I'm sure the dress is beautiful, and more importantly, hooray that it was a thin dress and you felt beautiful in it!! Here's a funny mental thing I noticed yesterday - I wore a shirt to church that I always thought was too clingy before. I put on my 'tummy tightener' garments and wore it anyway, even though I weigh more than I did when I first bought it. And I didn't think it was that bad. I think it's just amazing how the brain shifts when you are losing weight. 260 on the way down seems much smaller than 260 on the way up for some reason!

Have a great day today - a great on-plan day, whatever number we're on now.

[Karli]

Yes, you are so right ! The whole weight thing feels so different on the way up than it does on the way down ! It shows how there is so much involved mentally, too !

Wow, I have to just type in that I feel like I am dropping like 15 pounds today !!! It's not that I am ravenous, I just feel like my whole body is recalibrating, like there's a lot going on in there !! It's a bit of a strange feeling ... it's like I feel as though I am getting skinny overnight (except it's during the day, hee hee) !! I will be curious as to what the scale reads tomorrow.

[Nurcyn]

Hi Karli!

I'm a newbie here, always wanted to try Medifast but never wanted to spend the $$!! But, I finally sucked it up and ordered....couldn't wait for it to arrive. I started on Saturday, so yep, today is day 3 and I'm cruisin! I, of course, have been dealing with OVERWHELMING fatigue, headaches, nausea and fierce hunger, but I'm determined to overcome the flesh and I know God will give me the strength to conquer it! I also keep telling myself, "just get through a few days and it's all downhill from there!" So, I'm enjoying your journaling and knowing someone else out there is in the first week, too. WE CAN DO THIS!! Nice to *meet* you, my name is Cyndi...best of luck to you.

[sidrah]

See, scales don't mean as much as your feelings do. The numbers mean something, too, but how you feel is more important, I think. Good for you. How did the call back go?

[Karli]

Hi Cyndi, nice to meet you . Thanks for chiming in and thanks, Sidrah for stopping by . I didn't get a call back, actually . It's my own fault really, and it's a lesson learned, but I don't know how I feel about it just yet. Too many other things to be thinking about, I guess. I will probably be able to think more about it in a few weeks. People are wanting me to be auditioning for young artist programs all around the world ... heh. I need to really make some decisions regarding that...

Well, I *am* pretty hooked to the scale ... but I am trying not to let it affect me too much. I was hoping to see a big loss this morning, and I suspect I would've, but I couldn't sleep last night and tossed and turned after I couldn't fall asleep at all for a while, then I woke up starving around 1:30am and needed to get up and have a supplement (I think I had stayed awake without a supplement for too long before that !). So, this morning I was actually up from yesterday by .2 of a pound. I will take that though ! I would really like to have a good night's sleep tonight, and have a good weigh in tomorrow. I am feeling all pumped up to be putting the 180's behind me !

I also need to start weighing my L/G. I have a suspicion that yesterday's was too much, and I can't let myself get away with that !

Cheers to all !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[nickieluv]

Measuring - that is the main reason I am reluctant to try a L&G again. I let myself get away with eyeballing it for so long that I suspect I will fall right into that trap again. And measuring annoys me. But if this week of 6&0 gets me really crabby again, I will have to face up to the fact that I need more food and start measuring a L&G again.

I'm sorry you didn't get a call back. Even if you weren't sure that you wanted the part, it's disheartening I know. But there is always next time and maybe you could call the casting people and ask for feedback to direct your practicing if there is going to be a next time?

I'm just really proud of you for putting yourself out there. I know how scary auditions can be and it's not something a lot of people would volunteer for in life. And I imagine it doesn't get any easier even if you have an audition every single day. You're basically asking someone to want you, and it's scary to think they might not.

When you're ready to process your feelings about this latest one, I hope you get something good out of it. And young artist programs around the world?! Sounds exciting and wonderful - thankfully now with the amazing internet you'll never be far away from us.

[sidrah]

Eh, everything happens for a reason. Sometimes it takes longer to see the big picture, but what should happen will!

[Karli]

Yeah, no call back, however, now I am not actually positive that I haven't been actually cast. So, I will see. I heard through the grapevine that the main character has not actually been cast yet ... which is interesting. It's a role that many sopranos can sing, with the exception of a single aria that is a bit of a killer. I was scared to prepare it, so I didn't learn the aria and I didn't try for it. HOWEVER, the night before the audition, I came to realize that I could actually sing that darn aria pretty well, if I put my mind to it. So, IF it hasn't been cast and IF I haven't been cast for something else, they will probably hold auditions for it again (I'm thinkin' next Spring), and I will go ahead and prepare the aria this time and sing the you-know-whaties outta it this time .

In the meantime, they actually asked me to "cover" the role of the Countess in the Marriage of Figaro for 2010 ! That is pretty cool. The Artistic Dir. had asked me to audition for it a year ago, indicating she already had me in mind for it, but I basically said no and didn't bother auditioning. Then I emailed her about a month after the auditions, asking if they would hold more auditions because I was interested after all, but she said it had already been cast. Then she cast me for that role in a smaller thing that I just did last Spring, and now they have asked me to understudy it for the mainstage in 2010 ... I'm kinda thinkin', if it's mine to sing, it's mine to sing. I certainly don't wish any ill will on the individual whom has been cast, but maybe she will get a better offer somewhere else and decide to step out ? Everybody wins that way ... hee hee .

Well, I let myself get outta bed too early for an encouraging weigh in this morning ... 187-even again ... bleh. But, that was at 4:30am, so I am going to try not to get too disappointed. I knew it would be higher than if I had slept in a couple of hours more, but I really wanted to get up and start studying my piano music ... so, I literally said to myself "Karli, it's either practicing or a better weigh in... what's more important to you ?" ... I decided to get up.

Cheers to all, and let's rock our worlds with good choices, lotsa water and MF today .

[Karli]

Didn't even bother weighing this morning; woke up at 2-something, got up at 3am and I have some coffee in me, a bar, and I am studying my piano pieces. I don't enjoy these times when I can't get to sleep early and can't sleep in until at least 6:30am ... but, I am not going to file a formal complaint to life about it. I am focusing on being grateful for what I've got, which is a lot, really. And, I definitely can use the time to practice, I just need to make an extra point of being alert and mindfully capable of practicing smartly, even at these potentially sleepy hours.

MF was good yesterday (of course !), though waking up this early means I have an extra supplement in my day. I don't love that, but it's the way it goes so long as I am up for as long as I am up. I am hoping that the end of the school year "stress" and getting myself prepared for my next piano lesson will subside as the next week wears on, and I will be able to get myself to a more suitable schedule again soon. Until then, I need to brace myself for the scale to read that I am at a plateau (been here, done this a NUMBER of times), and not get discouraged about the circumstances being less than ideal.

Anytime the thought comes to go off program (as some sort of "remedy" to getting myself on a regular schedule again), I ask myself "and where does that leave me then ?" and the answer is always the same : "In the same place I have been for the past few months" --- and even longer than a few months if I consider the last couple of years . I am simply not willing to be in the same place anymore !!!!! So, stay on program I must, even if it seems I am in a stall, due to other circumstances !! This can't go on forever, and when it ends, I will be happy I stayed the course.

I hope everyone rocks the day ! Cheers !

[nickieluv]

I'm glad you have a strategy for the urge to eat something off plan. It is so easy to go back to habits held for a lifetime, and so hard to keep going with the change you want to make - even if you want it really badly. I'm amazed that you can practice with any efficacy so early in the morning, too! I would be useless. But I think it's great that you make an 'odd' schedule work for you on a night like that. Have a great MF day!

[DogMa]

Hey, I saw "The Marriage of Figaro" a few months ago. I loved it, except that I wound up coughing my way through the first act and having to leave in the middle of the second or third (and missing the end). I think the people around me wanted to kill me, and I wouldn't have blamed them.

Anyway ... that's a good role. Too bad you don't live closer to me, or I'd go see you!

[Karli]

hee hee ... I haven't even seen the Opera yet , except for maybe once, years ago, on video .

All I'm gonna say right now is : GRRRRRR ... *so* frustrated !!! Not about food, but I just got done teaching my last University class today and they are fairly upsetting, those students, sometimes !!!

Trying to clear my head to get back to madly practicing and making good eating choices today ! My mantra is what Tawanda and Lauren were writing about a bit ago in that, those frustrating things, those stressful times, they will *always* be there ! I might as well treat myself the right way in the midst of it, instead of trying to remedy the situation by eating things I know I don't truly want to be eating, and making it worse ! But, seriously, GRRRRR !

[DogMa]

Very true. And eating junk, or skipping exercise, or whatever other bad choices there are, will only make you feel worse in the long run. You'll be angry and frustrated with your student, and also with yourself.

Hang in there, Karli. Take a walk, or listen to some music, or whatever makes you happy and soothes your nerves (other than, oh, pizza and ice cream!).