jskm wrote:Personal vent to follow. Please do not take any of the following statements seriously nor feel any need to report any of the following to the authorities. Thank you.
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Oh gods of parental wisdom please grace me with your knowledge and tell me why oh why does my child feel compelled to project every item of each and every meal as far as humanly possible and onto every object within range of his tiny arm?????? Please tell me there is a purpose. Please don't tell me he's just having fun or trying to get my attention or some other common or probably correct explanation. Please tell me it's because he's likely to be a world class olympic shot put champion, or a world series baseball pitcher, or a superbowl champion quaterback, and he needs to practice his skills early so he can someday earn me millions of dollars and each time I break my back picking his meal up off the floor I am investing in my own retirement. Please tell me that each time I scrub his splattered dining delight off of the walls and all of the furniture he could possibly hit, it is because he is destined to be some kind of artist and he is learning at an early age to express himself and that someday his works will earn me millions and again I am investing in my own retirement by killing myself cleaning this crap up. Because if I have to clean up one more splattered breakfast, lunch, or dinner off my walls I'm afraid the next thing splattered on the wall might be my child!!!!!!!
Ahhhhhhh. That's better. Thank you.
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