The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Guest]

I was doing so well. Last night I had made it through day 2...almost.

My hubby wanted to go to dinner with some people. I said, Ok...I 'll just get a side salad with ff dressing and some skinless chicken breast. Had it all planned out. I did, but then.....I gave in and ate a roll. That just set me up for the "well...I've already blown it so why bother?" thing. You all know what I mean, right?

Today I was going to get back on track and my hubby brings me a cinamon roll from McDs. WhY????? He knows how hard this is and how badly I want to lose the weight!

Why can't I have more self control?

I am so upset with myself. I literally thought I could taste success this time!!

[Denise]

You will be successful...you need to tell hubby to get real!

It's over with...you can make a fresh start right now!

Remember..the first few days are the hardest..it will get easier!

Also ..please remember ..everyone on this forum is in the same situation....there is strength in numbers!

[dede4wd]

Hi Guest,

The first 3-4 days are TERRIBLY tough on a lot of people. I tried not to go out until I had a handle on what I was eating! What is important is that you get right back going on the plan again. These things sometimes happen, but if you start right up again...you minimize the impact of the cheat. It took me almost a YEAR to get back on track when I fell off the wagon...I kick myself because I could've been AT GOAL by now!

As for the cinnamon roll...You need to tell your hubby FOR SURE how important this plan is and succeeding on it is to you. He'll get on board. Sometimes spouses (and so do we) equate food with love and he was trying to be thoughtful and show he loved you, but once you convince him HOW IMPORTANT this program is to you and how much you will give up to succeed, he'll come around!

Join us and register (it's free!) Post all you like! We'll try to help get you through the hard parts!

DeDe

[Unca_Tim]

Making mistakes is part of learning.

[Ct. Yankee]

The other posters here are so right! And, so are you, for coming on here to admit you had a couple of slips. Now, get right back on, not tomorrow, but for the rest of this day. It may take an extra day or two to get back into ketosis but once you do, the first three days of feeling 'yuck' will go away.

As for hubby, tell him over and over how much you love him, and ask him to help you in any way he can to get you to your goals. Your husband sounds like a very thoughtful one, who like one poster wrote, only wants to show you how much he loves you. Next time, tell him to bring you a beautiful flower!!! And, the best of good luck to you in your weight loss journey. Stick with us, and you cannot help but do well!!

Joan

[Arklahoma]

You can do this and perseverance is the key!!!

[falisamarie]

Today is a new day. You had a slip but have not failed. It's kind of like if you trip and fall you just have to get back up. You can do this and our hubbies do learn. My hubby used to get me food but this morning he went out and brought me home three beautiful red roses!
They will last longer than a cinnamon roll too!

Lisa

[2BHealthy]

I know it's easy for me to say, but don't be so hard on yourself. I say the same things when I'm talking about me! Why don't I have self control?? I have given in a few times and get so upset with myself. The important thing to remember is we are reversing our bad eating habits (in my case a lifetime of them) and that takes time. We just have to stop ourselves right away and not give up. Get right back on Medifast and it will get easier, I promise!

[Mike]

I know for a fact that this is a hard program, both for the person on it and the others involved. You need to let your hubby know that its a wonderful thing for him to be thoughtful and bring you "snacks", but that the plan that you are on is very restrictive. Thank him, and then let him know that he can have the roll. Politely remind him that this is difficult for you, and the temptations are there already. If he goes, just ask him to bring you a coffee or diet soda, and that would be very thoughtful of him.
As for the blowing it part... it happens. You just get back in there and refocus yourself. It does get easier after the hunger stops after about 3-4 days. After that, its just a matter of reminding yourself of what is more important to you.

Good luck!

[aphrael]

Everyone has given you great advice, the first few days are the hardest hunger wise, and it might take you even longer before you are ready to handle a resturant. They are very tempting and often have hidden fat and calories. Try saving the eatting out till you can stand up for what you want and not be embarresed to say I want a grilled chicken breast with no oil and veggies with no butter! And when you do be proud of yourself. Take it day by day or meal by meal if you have to. Remember this isn't just about losing weight, it is about learning how to feed your body in a healthy way for life.

If you haven't yet sit down with your husband and explain the program to him in detail, show him why even a little thoughtful snack from him isn't allowed. Don't just say I'm on a diet and can't have that, most poeple that don't understand how Medifast works can't compreheand. I went though that with my family "corn is a vegitable why can't you eat that"

It is frustraiting, it is hard, but it does get better and you will build confidence in yourself, in your moments of weakness come here and you will find all kinds of support. Good luck and get right back on track!

[dede4wd]

GREAT post Aphrael!

Loved it!

DeDe

[sheila]

Hi. I am sorry you are already feeling frustrated. I dont know if this is your husband's issue, but think alot of times many husbands are actually "afraid" of seeing their wives lose weight. I think that sometimes, they become so comfortable with us being big, just because they might feel a little more secure with themselves. Maybe if we dont lose the weight, they wont have to worry about other guys flirting with us, or even worse, ya know, WHO KNOWS what goes through the male brain? But if your husband is secure with himself, then maybe this doesnt discribe him at all. If he was just trying to show you he loves you and he was thinking of you, tell him there are other ways of showing love than with food. Just hang in there, and give it some time.

[Arklahoma]

I agree with Sheila ... This could be a communication issue or a mixed signal kind of thing. My husband and I were having some issues many years ago and sought marital counseling. I had the typical female complaint that he never said he loved me or showed affection. During one particular session, he explained that he changes the oil in my car, keeps the gas tank full and my car washed so that I don't have to worry with it and so I can be safe out and about. He said that this was his way of telling me that he loved me. I was aghast b/c my father and brother are mechanics, so these activities were daily "men" stuff to me, not an expression of love. This was after we had been together for over ten years! Your spouse could have very easily been trying to show his feelings for you. Many people feel that food is a reward for when you've been "good".

Another point I'd like to make is that my husband has seen me diet and cheat so many times over the last fifteen years that he sometimes gets very confused about what's going on. Many times, when I'm dieting, he'll bring me food when he's preparing dinner for himself. Other times, when I'm not dieting, he'll think I'm dieting and go eat by himself. The past three months is the ONLY time that I've ever been compliant on a diet and he is just NOW starting to get it that I can't have even healthy food. If your dieting history is anything like mine, then you need to cut him some slack. He's just caught in the middle and doesn't know what to do.

Best of luck to you and your family.

[Mom23]

Ark,
What you learned in your counseling actually reminded me of a study that my husband and I did with a couples group at our church -- Five Love Languages. We found out that I show love through "gifts of service" (I like to do things for people and love when people do things for me (without asking)). Hubby's is "words of affirmation" -- he likes to be affirmed and is good about affirming others.

Everyone has a love language that they use -- even children. If you take the time to learn what others (spouses, children) language is and what yours is -- it makes it so much easier to understand the relationship and one another.

BTW, everyone has one love language that is predominant and the others play minor roles...

There is a website by the same title of the book and study that gives info on this.