The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[DonicaB]

We went to my inlaws this past Friday night and Saturday. They live 3 1/2 hours away so I had to take my MF with me and planned on having a Lean & Green for supper on Saturday.

They do not know I am on MF again, I just don't want to tell them, I want them to see that I am losing weight.

I weasled my way out of breakfast by conveniently taking a shower at that time and saying I would get something later. Then during lunch, well, we didn't have lunch (my mother-in-law rarely is concerned about food, unlike Moi). I ate my bar at what should have been lunch. Then during supper I was planning to have my L & G, except she didn't fix any Green , she only had potato salad and baked beans, so I only ate my Lean.

Anyway, we are sitting around the table and both of my husband's parents start talking about how good my husband looks, about how he had lost a lot of weight, and how he looked like he had really been working out. YUCK! They, of course, did not notice that I have lost weight. Honestly, only my DH can tell right now.

It just made me sooooo mad . My DH has lost about 10# since Christmas and has been working out and does look good (real good, as a matter of fact), but it is easy for him. He just cut back a little, for example, instead of 3 sandwiches for lunch he only had 2. Stuff like that.

I guess it just hit me the wrong way. I just thought I would share this little frustration.

DonicaB

[DonicaB]

I guess I should add a little background info about me. I often get jealous of the googling my in-laws do over my husband and his siblings. This is probably because both of my parents are deceased and I feel like I have no one to google over me, except my DH (who tries very hard to make-up for me not having a mom & dad).

Both of my parents died at what I consider very young ages. My mom died in 1994 on her 53rd birthday of a rare form of brain cancer. My father passed away in 2001 at 60 years old from prostate cancer. I was very close to both of them and had a wonderous childhood. I miss them dearly.

Anyway, maybe this explains some of my food issues as well as my jealousy issues.

DonicaB

[Principessa]

Awww... that sucks so much! Regardless of your tendency to get jealous over his family googling over him so much, it just sucks when YOUR accomplishments aren't given the due notice they deserve! I would be very annoyed too! VERY annoyed!

The only person who has commented on my weight loss is a gal I do my "duty" with during one of the nutrition breaks at the high school I teach at. And I think she only noticed and commented freely about it because she knows I've been dieting (since I'm not having my usual cafeteria junk fest during that time!). I want more people to take notice! It's 14lbs! It's over 20% of the total I want to lose! That's a difference!

Just wait until the next time you see them! They won't be able to NOT notice!

[DonicaB]

OMG Principessa, I am a teacher too. We will have to keep track of each other. I teach computers at the middle school in Troy, Missouri. (Hence the easy access to the internet and this forum). Thanks for your support.

DonicaB

[raederle]

Oooooh, Donica-- that *is* awful!!! You deserve a HUGE pat on the back for getting through that challenging day without screaming at anyone-- you took the high road by smiling thru the compliments on your DH's progress and quietly sticking to plan the whole time. *We* know what a great job you're doing!!!

Just to sympathize a little, I was having a hallway chat with a few people from my office, and weight loss came up as a topic, so I mentioned that I had lost 20 pounds since I started this job back in November. They just looked at me and said, "You did? Really?" Nice! Real nice! Oh well-- I know you miss your parents, and they certainly *would* be telling you how wonderful you look! But at least your DH is so wonderfully supportive... and he's the one who's gonna see you nekkid! Keep up the awesome work, Donica, and don't look back!

[Principessa]

Raederle - sucks that they were surprised that you'd lost so much in their presence... but looking at your wedding photos in the studio, at first I thought you were ALREADY at goal in those! You looked fabulous!

Donica - Today I'm takin' the day off from work... needed a mental health day and a break from the kiddies. I teach freshman Biology, so we're working with pretty much the same age group. I can usually sneak a few peeks at the boards during school... wish it were more! Funny how many things you find in common with others on this board! You must be almost done with school for the day... love that feeling!

[raederle]

but looking at your wedding photos in the studio, at first I thought you were ALREADY at goal in those! You looked fabulous!

You are so sweet! But trust me when I say I picked that dress because it was expertly designed to cover my "problem areas"... heh heh heh.

[LilMsTexas]

Just wait until they see you THIS CHRISTMAS!!

Ya know, your parents passed away at the same age my parents are right now and I can't EVEN BEGIN to imagine that loss. I can only believe that they are looking at you with such pride and love right now and so happy that you are managing your health above all. Congratulations on not letting that emotional sabatage be a show stopper for you
WAY TO GO GIRL!!

[DonicaB]

Thanks LilMsTexas for the kind words. My mom was a lifetime weight watcher. She was only 5' tall and weighed 200# when I was in the 5th grade. She lost 65# on weight watchers and kept her weight off without yo-yo dieting. She was amazing.

I ate weight watcher meals for most of my life. Probably why I stayed thin throughout HS and college. It wasn't until I had kids that I started gaining and it wasn't until my mom passed away that I really started packing it on.

Raederle, your co-workers are probably just jealous that you look so good. I just checked you out on the Studio forum and you are a total knock out. You look Mar-ve-lous Darling!

Thanks to all of you for your support.

DonicaB

[ShineGirl]

DonicaB~
Sorry you had to deal with your inlaws being insensitive. AT least you stayed on program and weren't tempted by that stuff....I can't say the same thing for myself...Darn it, I went to the neighbors house on Sat. night for a bbq....didn't do horribly but didn't stay on the L & G either....A little disappointed, but wanted to come clean! Have your inlaws always pretty much ignored you? Maybe their mad that you took their "baby" away. I hear a lot of boy moms are jealous of the new woman in their sons life. It's definitely not your problem, it hers. Sorry to hear about your parents....my dad past away in March 98 (heart attack and stroke) at the age of 58. He died on St. Patrick's day of all days...constant reminder on the calendar. I know it's hard....you feel jipped don't you? There's no rhyme or reason. Hey, I'm a teacher too! I'm a resource specialist at an elementary school in Sacramento (Spec. Ed). Basically it's a pull out program, so if there are annoying kids (which there are) they don;t stay with me all day. Yahoo! SPeaking of kids, the bell just rang and I have yard duty in front of the school..Oh joy! Keep your chin up, you're doing great! Krissie

[DonicaB]

Krissie--Yeah his parents have always treated my like their son's wife and not like a daughter. Don't get me wrong, they are kind to me and even loving, but they subtly let me know that I am not their child. For example, at Christmas time my husband's sisters get very thoughtful type gifts and my sister-in-law and I get toasters, etc. My husband finally just told them to get me gift certificates instead of something they picked out the day before we open gifts. I know I sound materialistic, but truly I am not. I think it just reminds me how much I miss my own parents and long for their companionship, especially around the holidays.

You are absolutely right, I feel jipped. I am too young not to have parents. I will soon be 39. As a matter of fact one week from today. At least before I turn 40 I will be skinny. Yipee!!

I am sorry you have had to experience the loss of your father. It is difficult. I will keep you in my prayers.

DonicaB

[ShineGirl]

DonicaB~
Good job on the weight loss....you must be so excited to be skinny for your bday! That's my goal too...I'll be the big 30 this JUly....I'd settle for an "acceptable" weight Have your inlaws listened to your husband about the gift certificates? They may as well give you a card...at least it's more thoughtful than a toaster! I can't stand it when people act "polite"...I think I'd rather be ignore to tell you the truth. At least your sister in law gets the cold treament with you. Now you know it's not that they don't like you, it's their problem, not yours. DO you have any kids? If so, how do they treat them? Are you just their granchildrens mother? Happy early bday to you......when it comes to them, just consider the source and disregard the purpose. My mom always tell me that when people make me feel bad! Keep your chin up...it sounds like you're doing awesome. It's good they live so far away huh? Have a good morning! It's 2:45 am and I have serious insomnia even though I took Trazadone for sleeping...it's working like a charm can't you tell? How am I supposed to function tomorrow on 3 hours of sleep, with elementary kids in special ed.? Oh well, such is life! Take Care, Krissie

[DonicaB]

Krissie~They have started giving me gift certificates and I have learned to just ignore the issue and not let it get to me. I have 2 sons, one is 16 and the other is 14. My inlaws treat both of them well.

I won't be skinny this bday, but look out next year, we are both going to be total knock outs.

Thanks for the encouragement and understanding. I hope you were able to get some sleep.

DonicaB