FutureEMT

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FutureEMT

Postby FutureEMT » January 31st, 2007, 2:15 pm

Well this is my first day, first journal, here! As of now I am saving money and trying to find a job so that I can start medifast! I am right now eating very healthy so that I can go ahead and get started losing some weight, but I can't wait until I get to start the program! :) Everyone is so nice and I am so excited about the prospect of FINALLY being thin. I've always been the fat kid and I really new I had a problem when I was asked to get off a ride at 6 flags because I the harness wouldn't fit...it almost did and I tried to suck in but alas, it wouldn't...it was probably the most humiliating experince of my life. Hopefully soon I'll not only be able to fit on the rides but I'll be able to pull people out of cars, lift stretchers and run so that I can risk my own life to save someone elses. I so want to be a great medic....and I CANNOT be one until I am able to run, sprint, lift, etc...without getting too winded or having to stop for a rest...people are going to need me and i have to be able to help them, no matter what....talk about motivation....lol....and pressure! :shock:
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Postby FutureEMT » March 18th, 2007, 12:26 am

I read this on someone's journal and thought it was a good idea....
here's my list of why I hate being fat and want to be thin

20 THINGS I HATE ABOUT BEING FAT

1.When I sit I have to stare at my belly and wonder if others are staring.
2. I can't wear the clothes that a 20 year old should
3. I feel tired a lot.
4. I have no confidence in myself.
5. I feel juged everytime I'm out in public.
6. My relatives keep suggesting different diets to me.
7. I'm at high risk for heart disease and diabetes.
8 I can't go to theme parks because I'm afraid of getting thrown of the rides.
9. My arms won't touch my sides without force.
10.The potential mates I want don't give me a second look,
the bad ones flock because they sense my insecurity.
11. I don't feel comfortable around my thin friends.
12. I'm self conscious about the way I eat in public.
13. I get out of breath too easily.
14.I can pick my belly up and sit it on the counter because of my spare tire
15. Sometimes in public when talking to someone if they look me over,
I wish I was invisible.
16. I can't run without the "belly bounce"
17. I have back clevage.
18. I can't relax for photos because I have to hold my head a certain way
so that I don't expose my double chin.
19. I can't even think of putting on a bathing suit
20. Sometimes I make myself sick when I look in the mirror.


WHY I WANT TO BE THIN

1. I want to be confident
2. I want to shop in the normal sized section
3. I want to feel sexy
4. I want to feel FLAT
5. I want to wear a bathing suit
6. I want to be healthy
7. I want to finally be free
8. I want to tell the joke instead of being the joke.
9. I want to put my heart worries behind me
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Postby Unca_Tim » March 18th, 2007, 7:37 am

Welcome to the forum Future,

Great attitude for starting. Keep your head in this place, read your lists regularly, and you'll be a Future thinny before you know it.

I'm exited for you and glad you found us....:)
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Postby JonnaD » March 18th, 2007, 7:56 am

You've found a great place for support. We've all been there and done that. I'm so proud of you doing this at such a young age. My youngest child is older than you :lol:

Jonna
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Hi Future!

Postby larahb68 » March 18th, 2007, 10:56 am

Just wanted to say hi and say I can relate to the issues of obesity in healthcare. I'm actually a physician assistant and it's really uncomfortable to see patients who are diabetic and have hypertension and hyperlipidemia, etc. when I know that the answer is to lose weight...
How can I give that advice when I am no model for them?!?

Well, we're in the right place and our motivation will carry us. GOOD LUCK!! :)
Lara

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Postby nickieluv » March 18th, 2007, 3:25 pm

EMT;

I posted a similar thing in my journal when I first started. Someone suggested (and now that I'm wiser I agree :D ) that I should focus more on the positives than the negatives.

My attitudes and my committment to the plan had a huge shift once I realized that I could be happy at any weight - and that being thin would not solve all my problems. One thing in your list struck me - that you want to finally be free. What would that feel like? Look like? What would you do that you can't do now?

Create a picture of your ideal life, and then use it as an affirmation. Do some things from your ideal life everyday. Live the life you want NOW, even though you're not happy with your size. If you can learn that your life is really everything you want it to be already, rather than take away your motivation to diet (which was my fear), it makes you realize that you can succeed at anything you want, and that nothing (not even your excess poundage) will be in your way.

Of course, I am a major emotional eater, and I was using my weight as a big security blanket. So what worked for me may not work for you. But you might want to try it, anyway.

Welcome - you will do great!!
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Postby FutureEMT » March 18th, 2007, 11:16 pm

Okay, so tomorrow(well technically today) is the big day! I make the leap to start changing my life. I'm excited about it and still a little nervous. I've tried a lot of things, since I was 10 I've been trying to lose weight, instead I kept failing, feeling like a loser and being bullied at school.

Now I stand a young woman on the verge of finally setting my body free and I honestly don't know how I'm going to do it. I've made up my mind that I'm simply going to take it one day at a time. My only concern is with the sodium and potassium levels dropping. It worries me because I'm afraid I might die, but I have to face my fear because if I don't do this eventually I will die, either from old age or my fattness.

One good point is that I have someone inspiring me to do this. All of the wonderful people here are ofcourse, but I'm talking about someone "special". The person I admire from afar, wishing that I could let my insecurities go just so that I could be myself around them. Unfortunately for me, I have the self-confidence of a wet mop, and though this person is my friend, I still cannot open myself up to them and let them see the real me, the me that is always there, but in my mind, hidden under layers of fatty tissue.

I'm so tired of feeling sad, lonely, depressed, and afraid to go out sometimes because of the way people look at me. I don't go to the mall anymore simply because of the looks I get. Honestly my body could be a lot worse. I got lucky, my hips, butt, and thighs are not very large at all. They are not small, but they honestly don't match my middle and chest. My belly and upper body is where I carry my bulk. I have the "spare tire" around my waist.

So tomorrow is it, I place my order, and my products I assume will arrive in about a week, I'm on the east coast, down in Georgia. I do NOT want to waste $275 and I do NOT want to be FLABulous anymore. :toast: so here's to taking that first step toward freedom!
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Postby JonnaD » March 19th, 2007, 3:06 am

I think you'll find most of us have issues with our self image. We don't need others to judge us because we do enough of it ourselves. I still have problems accepting the people in my writing groups respect what I have to say. Even when our eldest member (he's 93) pays me the compliment that he didn't fall asleep once while I was giving my talk. (He usually naps during speakers :lol: )

I know, with me anyway, it's not just the weight issue, but other issues which existed before the excess weight. Which is why I so agree with Lara and accepting what we have now and choosing to be happy, now. Because happiness IS a choice and one we have to make for ourselves. No one else can give it to us or take it away from us unless we give them that power. That doesn't mean I think we should live like a bunch of Pollyanna's and that what other people do and say don't have affects. I mean we have to choose to go beyond the hurt and find the joy.

Enjoy today and enjoy the power of knowing you made the choice to improve your health. Whether you want to vent or shout about your victories, we'll be here, ready to share.

Jonna
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Postby Tawanda » March 19th, 2007, 5:55 am

Welcome!
Began MediFast 2/10/07 212#
Reached Goal 3/15/08 147#
Renewed commitment 9/20/09-after regaining 38# (185#)
Reached Goal 1/25/10 147# Maintaining :)
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Postby FutureEMT » March 19th, 2007, 10:03 pm

first of all than you all for your replies! :)

As for my first step taken, well I took it, sorta...I did call TSFL today and placed an order with Stacy( a very nice lady may I add), the only problem...I don't have a debit card nor credit card. I was prepared to send a money order, but I learned that that is no longer accepted(bummer) anyway, I've got to go to my bank and get a debit card so that I can finalize my order. Right now it's on hold.

As for me at the moment, I'm feeling strange, I had a very high fat, carb filled, chessy, meaty supper several hours ago, and I hate to be grose, but I have gas that feels like I'm gonna pop. I'm a little light headed and weak, but I know that it's because my blood sugar is acting strange. I'm not a diabetic...yet...

Anyway, as for my MF order, I'm really excited, and cannot wait until it shows up at my door! I'm ready to be thin and healthy. At this point I'd settle for just healthy, I don't really care as much about what I look like as to what I feel. Luckilly for me, the two go hand in hand though ;)

I have an appointment for a physical next month, on the 11th. Everything will be checked, which will be good to know. I will have been on MF for about 3 weeks at that point and I think it will really help knowing what my blood levels are.

I do have one question though...

I know that if sodium levels are low and I start getting a headache or feeling dizzy I should eat 2 pickles or drink some broth...but what about potassium? If I start cramping up...what do I eat or do to bring those levels up?

Anyway, that's all for tonight! Just wanted to let you all know that I am trying to get my journey started...

Britt
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Postby bikipatra » March 19th, 2007, 10:06 pm

Pickles are preserved with potassium benzoate, which is a salt.
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Postby Sojourner » March 19th, 2007, 10:17 pm

Hey, Britt ~ welcome to journaling!
I hope that you're able to place your order soon and get shaking!


FutureEMT wrote:I know that if sodium levels are low and I start getting a headache or feeling dizzy I should eat 2 pickles or drink some broth...but what about potassium? If I start cramping up...what do I eat or do to bring those levels up?

In my experience, the pickles work for muscle cramps, too. There was a post earlier today (somewhere) abou the Fast Soups being chock-full of potassium, so those might help as well. Of course, you may never even experience any of these symptoms - not everyone does.
~*~*~*Sojourner*~*~*~

Shake it gone, babeee!!!
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Postby FutureEMT » March 20th, 2007, 1:39 am

Oh ok! Thanks ya'll, I was worried about potassium, but yeah!!!!! Now I can kill two birds with one stone(poor birdies) and yes, you're right, I might not even have any symptoms...

I'm a first class hypocondriac(sp?) I drive myself crazy sometimes with it, I can only imagine how others feel when I get into those little "I just felt a twitch in my side, i wonder if my liver's ok" moods...lol j/k I DO worry though, but I'm a woman, isn't worrying second nature to us? LOL Thanks guys!
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Postby ChynnaDoll » March 20th, 2007, 3:12 pm

Hi EMT...WELCOME!! I'm so glad you've decided to join our MM family. This is the "BEST" place to be. I want to wish you the best of luck on your journey to a healthier life.

I loved reading your journal, and i LOVE your attitude!!

You'll do SUPER!!!

Love,
Chynna :-P
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HONESTY

Postby FutureEMT » March 20th, 2007, 6:35 pm

Ok, so today I'm still trying to get a debit card... Hopefully TSFL will hold my order long enough for it to arrive...no harm if they don't though.

As for me today, I've been pretty down :( I honestly cannot pin point the cause, I think I might have inherited my mom's bi polar disorder, because my mood swings are frequent and often without cause. Double :( :(

Luckilly, that can be treated, so when I go in for my physical next month I'm going to get a referal from my Doc. for a therapist.

I've got someone on my mind, whom I haven't spoken with in about a week, and it hurts...I hate to complain, but I have to talk about it. Isn't it funny how some people can work their way into your life and heart and when they're not there you feel a little bit empty? I do not let my happiness rely on someone else by any means, but I can't help but feel the effects...

On a positive note, I feel fine physically! I'm a little tired, but I'm always a little tired. My heart is on good behavior so that's also a plus. I seriously don't have any health problems, and I'm very thankful for that! My problems are mental. Nothing serious just an anxiety disorder and possibly a little bi polar, but I'm not sure about that. It could all be anxiety. There's a lot of stuff that went horribly wrong when I was growing up that caused me to be a lot older than I actually was, which in turn led to my anxiety. Maybe someday I'll share a little bit of my past, but I just don't feel comfortable right yet.

As for the MF, I'm so ready to get on the road with it! I can't wait to finally start losing weight!

Well thanks for listening...
Britt
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