hi everyone!
i wanted to talk to you guys about my mini-enlightenment that i am sure everyone else has realized already. maybe i am slow but i had to share!
i believe our society is set up for the food addict to fail. we are bombarded by food commercials, mega-sized servings and easy to get/fast food. many talk about how women are forced to fit into a stick-thin mold by models, etc. people recognize the negative consequences of this and the media addresses it. eating-disorders that cause weight loss are always covered and discussed and are treated as diseases in an emotional and physical light. why? because THEY ARE serious diseases. there are "triggers" that are defined in these serious disorders. and there is public awareness being spread and being accepted about these symptoms. it is wonderful to see that young people have access to the downfalls of these disorders. i just wish there was a real focus on the symptoms that come with
emotional weight gain.
what i am getting at is that as a heavy-set person, i have a different "trigger". i see pizza commercials, ice cream, etc. and i want to eat. i can never escape the social aspect of having a meal. my triggers are the bright signs of a fast food restaurant, the wonderful word "biggie" and the comfort of ready to bake cookies. food is really EASY.
i wish that people that are not weight challenged could see this and see that my triggers as an overeater are as strong as those of someone with food restriction issues.
i truly believe that i am an addict of sorts. i dont smoke, drink, do drugs.
i eat and i eat alot. i am trying to find a new way to cope with daily life. i am trying to see food as fuel and not as a friend. i am trying to face my problem without using the one thing that has helped me through many hard times. food has been my companion. it has been my happiness. it has been my tranquilizer. it has been my entertainment. it has been my life. this is a hard thing to change.
i hope that someone else understands this post. i feel like i have written a book! ihope i dont sound to "soap-box-y"
i am just trying to get through this journey without turning to food and i hope posting here will help in those moments!
take care guys
leeann
Starting weight on Nov. 3, 2008: 220 | Present weight: 220 | Goal: 135