Mike, it took me a long time to realize that I have a disease and it is not good for me to reward myself with food.
I am learning to appreciate the time spent with family and friends, the things I do with my hands and mind (what there is of it), a packet of seeds scattered in the yard, sharing DVDs with the neighbor kids, keeping the squirrel and bird feeders filled with seeds and peanuts, bringing RTDs and bars to a lonely diabetic lady in the country, afternoon visits and late evening phone calls to shut-ins, helping a divorcee getting back in the dating game select a cute hairstyle, watching a basket ball game with the fellows, going for rides on sunny days in Unca's red lotus, having my jeans still zip - these are my rewards...
It ain't easy. I do not always choose wisely but I am learnin' to do it right most days...you're making progress, Mike. You're are going to get there.