The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Miranda]

I've fallen off with a big thud! I had even been away from this forum. I felt guilty and most of all, I was angry at myself. My husband has not been helpful. He has been buying candy, breads, things that he knew I used to like. He has also told me I should not stay on a diet that restricts what I eat. He tells me I look good, but when I look at myself in the mirror, I don't think I look as good as he says. He admits I have some weight to lose, but he says I look very good and should not worry. However, I know my dress size. I know when I am not at my best. I lost 25 lbs last year October and had been struggling to get back to Medifast. I have boxes and boxes of Medifast foods, and i try to get back to it EVERY MONDAY! Then each day, after work, I get so tired and cannot fight it. I know I have been weak. I used to be so strong. I have not read anything in this forum that is in any way close to my problem. It seems that everyone is succeeding and I'm not. I need help! I need to get back to the program. I spoke to my husband and he was cooperative, but it would only last a few days. He would then want to take me out to dinner or lunch or bring home some of my favorite foods. I am struggling. I would like to hear from others who have struggled and how they were able to rise above it all. Thank you.

[stelar]

Miranda, I struggle every day! I see everyone losing weight so quickly & I just sit here and lose maybe 1 pound a week But, that's 1 more pound I've lost No more gaining. You have to decide how bad you want it. You can do this! You just have to be strong

[Hyperion]

Miranda,

You don't hear a lot of people posting your kind of problems because they abandoned. Right now, you didn't.

First off, your husband. He tells you you look good, then it's a sign he accepts you how you are. He sees you struggling with food, and he wonders why... I mean, in his head, you are fine. You have some pounds to lose, but hey, he loves you... Then, ask yourself the question: why are you doing this? Why do you wanna lose weight if your husband tells you you're fine?

Miranda, you want to lose weight because YOU want to feel more comfortable with your body. The reason why you want to lose weight is YOU, not your husband. Now there are two ways of ruling that out. First, you can quit your project to get thinner and continue living happily with your husband, even though you'll eventually experience some shame for not going through this project.

Or, second way, you need to have a serious discussion about your husband. I'm talking a discussion when you put your feelings on the table. Tell him how it's important for YOU to get thinner. For him, it may not be a big deal, but if it's important for you, and you make him realize that, he'll support you (more than 2-3 days).Remind him how it's important for you. Tell him what bothers you; the candies, breads, requests for going out to dinner, etc...

Now I can't guarantee he will help, but in my opinion, love is based on mutual respect, and mutual support for each other's projects.

Take some time to think about it and make your decision. This is not an easy one, but remember one thing: love is the most powerful ally you can have in ANY project you take on...

[DogMa]

I struggle with the same things as stelar. And with friends and family saying one cheat won't hurt and marveling at how I can "restrict" myself so much. We all struggle in one way or another.

If and when you talk to your husband (I think that's an excellent idea and very necessary), maybe you could also suggest some other ways he can "treat" you and show you how much he loves you. My cousin got chocolates from her husband every Valentine's Day even though she was dieting, and when she finally talked to him about it, he said he just didn't know what else to give her. Now she gets flowers and they're both happy. So maybe your husband just doesn't know what else to do, so he keeps doing what he's always done.

[THINKTHIN]

Talk about your hubby bringing home the good stuff....i'm typing to you right now, because my fiance is cooking fried potatoes, eggs, and steak for himself and our children! So, let me tell you I feel for you and the temptation... But, that is all it is! TEMPTATION! It will go away... I am slurping down my peach oatmeal and chuggin' down some water... I have closed the door that leads me into the kitchen where i smell the lawry seasoned potatoes in butter cooking! I can do this, and so can you! My fiance is 5'11'' and 180lbs of pure muscle. We are both in the military but he looks way much better than me.... We can do this!!!!! It's all up to you! He could be testing you as well.... Beat it girl.... you can do this!

Temptation is all it is.... You hold the key! Don't open the door..... Shut it and slurp your shakes, eat a bar, leave the room, etc.... :-)

Happy Losing,
~Tiesha

[smartipantz]

Wow Hype. You hit the nail on the head. Great post! Have you considered being a psychologist?

BTW, good job on the weight loss buddy

[Guest]

I'm right there with you, trying to find my own motivation that seems to have run away. I've found my biggest temptation to be french fries. It's great for all those people who say keep those foods away. I have one child where his diet due to a multitude of problems is on a formula diet plus potatoes and rice. And need the extra fat (both my kids are underweight) so french fries it is. My dh isn't a problem because he's on plan with me and at the moment doing far better than I, but when I falter he does to. Like if I screw up it gives him permission to and then I feel guiltier.

I was doing so great and then became VERY VERY sick and ended up having to go off plan because I just wasn't getting better and my body needed the extra calories. Finally struggling to find my way back. For those that have said those other foods aren't that great for some reason all the sudden to me they are. They taste absolutely wonderful and my motivation is lacking. I think part of it is that getting sick and getting off plan for 6 weeks has really knocked me from my original goal and I need to find a new one. I'm grateful to have only gained 5 pounds and last week was mostly on plan and had lost all of it plus an extra one and then Friday I lost my way again and I just can't seem to keep it straight. I think losing weight while "cheating" hasn't helped my cause. I need to stick with it and stick with it and as has been said before "get it done" I know how to do it. I've lost 40 pounds with about 80 to go but I think sometimes I get discouraged when everyone else seems to lose SOOO much faster and then having my dh climb on board and having him almost catch up in half the time it's taken me. I'll get there but I think part of my lack of motivation is seeing him so close to his goal knowing mine is SO far away.

I've been starting over everyday so I know I have some willpower left it just seems by lunch time to all run away and I want "something" real.

[Ginabobina1969]

Welcome back onto the wagon..there is a place for you here if you CHOOSE to take it.

We all make choices,every single one of us...each and every day, ALL day. It IS hard to deny ourselves of things we love or want. I cook breakfast, lunch and dinner for my family each day. Things I LOVE ...and yes, it is SO hard not to taste or touch "their" food but I WANT to be thin more then I want that food, so I choose not to eat it. My family are not on diets..so there is lots of snack and non diet items in my house since day one.

It is great that your husband loves you the way you are. My hubby does too(tho I can't understand it.lol) and would be fine with me the way I am except he knows how unhappy I am in my own skin. It sounds like YOU really aren't comfy in your own skin and want to lose the remaining weight for yourself.

Only one person can make this program work for you and that person is YOU! You can do it but you need to reach within yourself and steadfastly set your eyes on goals that you have set for yourself. Medifast is a wonderful tool, you have the "instruction book" that teaches you how to use the tool. It's up to you to use it. We are here to cheer you on and support you all the way,for we CAN identify with the struggle.

I often compare my attitude in this weighloss journey with another Journey I took allmost 6 months ago and that was quitting smoking. It was actually HARDER to quit smoking then to stick to this diet. Once I decided finally that there was to be NO more slips-cheats-not one puff ever again. The struggle ceased to exist and I finally was freed from a powerful addiction. Same thing here...You have to decide that your gonna do this...and there is no debating about ANY offplan food. PERIOD! It doesn't make it a breeze but it does take away any mental debates over a potential "cheat" the thoughts of, "oh, one won't hurt" are quickly shushed by the choice you made earlier, that, the answer to any cheating thoughts is NO No NO.. It sounds weird..but is what works for me.

You can do this! Believe it and as the saying goes..."Just do it!"

Hugs,
Gina

[Miranda]

To all of you that have posted your replies here, I am grateful. I had not been back here and today I received notice about the replies. I felt so good to get the support you are giving me. I have asked to meet with my husband to talk about this issue. I think he half knows what it is. While waiting to talk to him, I had been evading the kitchen and asking him to fix his two meals and I made a deal that I will fix his dinners. Through the day, I was happy to stay with the soups and the oatmeal and felt normal while sitting across him and his large meals. I have been thankful that he had not bought more junk food since the last supermarket haul. I have been feeling marginally better since I started Medifast yesterday. My challeng is the coming weekend. Each of your responses has taught me new ways to tackle and cope and I am thankful. You have helped me more than you know. I will visit here whenever I can to read all your responses whenever I need a boost. I will also post my progress. I am taking your advise to take it one day at a time. Love to all, Miranda.