The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Bonnie]

I grew up in of family eight. There were six of us kids. I was was number 2 in the line up.....Our house was very small, 3 bedrooms and one bathroom.

We were very poor. I remember so well how hungry I was. When the food was passed around we all got very small portions and there were never any leftovers unless it was liver and onions or vegetables we didn't like. We were taught that we had to eat everything on our plate as (there were children in China that were starving). So we were not allowed to waste our food.

I was wondering if any of you were told the same thing? I think that is why I became an over eater when I started earning my own money.

What do you all think??????

[want2Bthin]

Bonnie-

I can relate to being a member of the clean your plate club. My Mom was a big promoter of that one! There were only 4 kids in my family but my mamma came from a very poor family of 9 so I guess she was always afraid of not having enough. Not to mention my "real" Dad never paid child support so money was tight.

It's kind of funny, I was just telling someone that I was a premie when I was born. If you can imagine this, I only weighed 2.2 pounds. I tell my mamma that I certainly went to the other side of the spectrum!!

Angelia

[doglover]

I distinctly remember being at the dinner table for hours after everyone was done as my parents would not allow me up until I had finished whatever offending thing was on there. It was pure he--. I will never do that to my kids. Funny though, my mom and dad grew up very poor as well. We were far from it when I was a kid, but maybe their background was coming out in them.
Donna

[Yworry]

I heard that also about the poor kids in China (like my not eating was hurting them) But the worst was that I was the oldest and the boy, so my grandmother always encouraged me to have seconds and I would always help make sure there were no leftovers. Also when I went to Denny's or out to eat with her(which was about once a week) I would normally get two kids plates because one just wasn't enough .

Then my mom and I were talking yesterday, and she said you weren't that overweight before me and my best friends had cars. While I wasn't extremely overweight I did have to remind her that I have been DIEting for most of my life even before I was 16. I know I have to take responsibilty of my own choices but it is hard to reprogram all you have learned growning up.

But I will definetly not let anyone GUILT my son in to eating too much when he says he is done then so be it he is done.

[Seaside]

Yes, Bonnie, I can identify with this! My parents both grew up in the Depression era (I was a "surprise baby" born in their 40s) so nothing went to waste: the fat 'trim' from steaks was eaten, and every bit of the chicken, too. We were poor growing up so a typical meal when I was a kid was fried fatback and biscuits with flour/milk gravy or pinto beans (cooked with fatback)and cornbread. It certainly filled you up and with 4 growing kids, leftovers were not typical. I remember going over to the neighbors' house for dinner and embarassing my mom by asking for 2nds (thirds?) for dessert: lemon jello. I was punished for being a bad guest when I got home.

Once I left home for college and then grad school, poverty was again the rule. I remember that I would stretch a bag of rice and can of spam for 3-4 meals. So yeah -- once I had a job and could afford groceries, food was (and is) my splurge item. Thanks for opening this thought-provoking discussion; it has made me reflect on why I have the relationship that I do with food.

[Bonnie]

Clint, that is interesting that you had the same talk with your parents.

My mom is now living with us and while my husband and I are Medifasting she has new sayings like "you have to eat normal once in a while" then offers us things off the plan. I have given in a couple of times and the only thing it did was set me back for a week.

When my grandkids come over if they don't finish everything on their plates I quickly scrap their plates into the waste can were it belongs. If you think about it - it either goes to their waste or the waste can. Why over eat.

I am determined to break the bad patterns of my past.

It is good to hear I am not alone in this.....

[eddieHoustonTX]

HMMMM... I do remember tones of being the same! I can remember a time when my father made me sit at the breakfast table when I was 8 until I finished my scrambled eggs. I must have sat there for 2 hours and then I remember that I ended up hiding them up under the rug that was right under the table and then the dog got them later.

I think that the classic situation was one time when my mother advised tha tthere were children in other countries that were starving, then I replied that I wanted to know which countries and what the postage was to send the food there! I got slapped for that one.

Anyway Bonnie, this is a good point. I don't know. I am not sure if this why I overate. Couldn't tell you. But I am very much a here and now type of person. I do not believe in therapy either. I think that is a scam for psychologists to get rich. I live in the here and now and believe in cause and effect. I do not cry over spilt milk! I have found MF and I am grateful. Thanks.

[Bonnie]

Eddie, thanks for your reply.

I am so happy I found Medifast....not just for myself but for my husband (the love of my life "33yrs now") who had a triple bypass operation 3yrs ago. With Medifast we can both live healthier and longer.

Old habits are hard to break....I like your attitude of moving on. I just wish the past didn't hang out all over my body in the form of fat so everyone could see.....

Thanks

[horsey girl]

Hi, Bonnie. I didn't grow up in the large poor family but I did sit long hours at the table until my plate was clean and worried about starving children, only mine were in Africa. I think that was considered being a good parent back then. My mother in law used to hold my daughters chin and force pablum in her mouth! The things we do to our kids. She wound up bulemic for a while. My weight problems crept up with my growing career and increasing lack of physical exercise that went with it. That and a fondness for wine before supper which does wonders for my appetite but not my dying metabolism. ':deadhorse:'But in regards to the message you left me, Did you see I am in the #40 club? Cheers, Horsey Girl

[Diet Diva]

Hi there,

Yeah, I can relate to a lot of what you folks are discussing. Interstingly enough I didn't get the pressure from family to "clean my plate," but I did pick up some bad habits along the way. Fortunately my family shared healthy eating/cooking habits, and no one (except me) has a weight issue. I picked up the habits after getting married when I was the one in charge of making the food choices/portion sizes, and it all started with the out of control portion sizes. I used to cook dinner and eat along the way while I was in the kitchen. By the time dinner rolled around I would heap my plate full and eat the same amount as my husband so I would end up eating 2-3 times more than I needed--I imposed my own clean plate club... I also suffered from the "clean plate syndrome" while eating out. Somewhere along the line I felt guilty about paying for a restaurant meal and not eating it all. I guess I felt it wasn't an option to pack it home in a doggie bag, so I would snarf everything!!! That clean plate concept didn't really work for me! Medifast has truly helped get the portion thing under control. It's great to know we're all in this together.

Keep up the good work and have a great day.
Diet Diva

[Bonnie]

Horsey girl, congratulations ..... in the 40's club is awesome.........

Isn't it amazing what we do to ourselves.... I am so glad I found Medifast

Having Medifast every2-3 hrs has kept me from overeating anything. I also drink so much water that I feel like I can't stuff another thing down my throat.

It makes me feel so much better that I am not the only person who thinks like this......

[horsey girl]

Bonnie, I sure agree on the constant eating. Since I started Medifast I completely lost my desire for my before dinner glass of wine and I sure thought I'd miss that! Another thing I ditched was my morning cup of coffee. After nearly 40 years I found out that when I couldn't fill the cup 1/2 full of cream that I don't really like coffee after all.':shock:' I don't miss it either, I just have my medifast instead. Diet Diva, I sure hear you! When my career took off my husband took over the cooking. He is good but had no sense about portions. We just couldn't throw out all that good food so we would eat it and for some reason he could not divide a package of meat from the grocery store. He would tell me thats the way it came so he had to cook it.':?'
He would never deprive me by taking more himself than he gave me and of course it never occured to me not to eat it. Now he carefully weighs my portion for me! We are on track now and as usual he's losing weight on my diet even though he isn't on it.':x' At least this time he hasn't lost more than me.':mrgreen:' Horsey Girl

[Jan]

I guess I grew up on the other side of the "coin". Our family was solid middle class and there were only 2 children, my sister and I. My mother was a model and really controlled what we ate -- the food was dished up on our plates and that's what we had! So, I was thin until I got married (5"8" -- ll8lbs) but then I did the cooking and dishing up!! Boy oh boy no one to watch me -- I ATE and ATE -- gained 20 lbs in 2 months I was really surprised and of course thought the apartment dryer was shrinking my clothes That weight came off really quickly -only 23yrs old -- but did I learn my lesson?? NO -- well I did stay fairly thin until about 12 years ago when that old dryer was doing"selective shrinking " again -- only shrinking my clothes!! Now I'm on M.F. have lost about 25 - 30 lbs -- I stay off the scale alot -- and have about another 30 pounds or so to lose Small portions are the way for me!!
Jan you can do it and so can I