The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[MomJackieLee]

You're doing fabulous. Gives ME something to shoot for!!!

[Nancy]

Dutch ~

You look MAH-velous! You have been so diligent to work out and to work on the inside of you, too!

What a great lady you are and how we all enjoy you! You are almost there!

[DutchChoc]

Thanks, Jackie and Nancy. And working on the "head" never hurt, either, which is to say trying to find peace and balance and self-acceptance where the rule seems to have been, always, "this is not good enough". It's time to become a good, quick study on that!! AND, this is a good place to work on it. We all rock here.

[sudaoning]

Dutch, I so know what you mean about the old photos. I only have one of myself from the running 6 days a week and weight lifting phase of my existence. Keep it hoarded away in the album. It is the proof that there is indeed a much thinner and healthier person on the inside.

Actually it's kind of a family joke that Mom (me) is always on the backside of the camrea, so all photos of me are pretty rare. Maybe I will remedy that in the thin future to come.

[DutchChoc]

Yeah, Sudaoing, we must be/become picture-taking-fools this time to make up for lost time and opportunities. YOU will be there, and this time you will make an adequate number of documentations of said success. We will be sure that history remembers us as we wanted to be and were happy being. That's SO WORTH IT.

Glad you have that photo to remind you because I'm wanting you to get it back, too. Funny how when living in the moment and doing the running, etc, we didn't realize how precious it was, or that it would come to a close. I just LOVE trying to find that part of myself again so that I can treat it properly this time. Another of life's lessons.

[sudaoning]

My kids don't even have a decent photo of me as an adult. Was hoping to reach goal by the first of the year.......maybe I will make it by Christmas and remedy the photo deficit!
Wouldn't that make my Christmas shopping easy!

I still have not started on the exercise yet. My schedule is crazy and heavy and I guess a part of me is afraid that if I begin too soon I will have to increase to a level that I won't be able to maintain. All in good time I guess.

Hiked this morning, my favorite, but don't often find the time to indulge.

[Nancy]

Suda,

Don't worry about not exercising very much yet. People that exercise a lot during the weight loss phase slow their loss somewhat. All in good time. I should think that when you are down to 165-170 that will be a good time to begin - start off slowly. Right now you want to be protective of your joints - you could always do some stretches and some small weights to firm your arms. Be sure to wear supportive shoes when you begin any walking - don't sprong your feet - heels and toes can become stressed unless they are well-cushioned.

Take pictures along the weight loss journey. I TOTALLY understand not wanting to have a picture taken and it seems that once we FINALLY make the decision to lose the poundage, that we become more obsessed with how we look, that we avoid cameras just as much as we did when we were at our highest weight and that we become even pickier about our appearance. Enjoy the journey - you have made a good decision to change your eating habits, you have made a good decision to improve your health and you DO feel better physically and MENTALLY (because you ARE doing something positive for yourself) and you DO look better - yes, you DO look better already!

I'll bet your kids would love to have a picture of you! Wally World takes good pictures at a very reasonable price.

My daughter and I went to a baby shower this afternoon and there were a number of women there that we hadn’t seen for a couple of years. It was interesting to see their expressions and to listen to their comments. Several of the women had gained weight since we last saw them. They did not make any comments about my weight loss, how I looked and they actually seemed to totally ignore me. Some said that I looked really nice and that they had not recognized me until they heard my voice. The women in attendance that I did not know all made comments about how cool my hair is, about my tan, my pretty green shirt or my leather pants and how nice I looked…weird, huh? See…there are so many insecure people that they cannot even celebrate and be happy for other people’s success or even to just validate a person’s existence.

One of my goals as a teacher was to always ensure that every child in my classroom felt like they were my special pet. I made it a personal rule to always say something true and kind about each child each day. I weekly called my students’ Mom or Daddy at work with a “Good Kid Report’ to tell them about at least one awesome thing their kid did or said that week.

Life is precious. We must treasure one another, show acceptance and validate the value of others, all the more as we see the day drawing nigh. This weekend we remembered 9/11 with local and national ceremonies and we must not allow this to be merely an annual event to remember those that have gone on before us but to love and value those with whom we currently live and at least acknowledge our new acquaintances.

[sudaoning]

Thanks for your encouragement Nancy.

It is very educational when we can be detached from the words and actions of others, isn't it?......How often we see that it's not really about us at all......just their own personal stuff. Hard to maintain that detachment sometimes with the flabbage in tow.

Yes I am feeling sooooo much better already. I notice it all the time, doing chores, climbing stairs, just walking. I can hardly imagine how GOOD it will feel at goal!

Guess I'll just have to get there so I won't have to imagine.



Donna

[Nancy]

Donna, you are very close to crossing over the 190 mark and then you will be in a whole new catagory. Enjoy the journey. Really every benchmark is a wonder as your body shrinks, your heart swells with hope and your mind surges with anticipation of all the possibilities that have been dormant inside of you.

You are on the threshhold of new life, Hon.

[sudaoning]

look out world here we come




whole flocks of MFers burstin out of our shells!!!!

[DutchChoc]

I LOVE that, Sudaoing-- we ARE some lovely ducklings! You're doing great, like Nancy says, in my opinion. I've only been exercising two weeks or so now. The weight came off wonderfully by just doing the shake-lifting.

Nancy, odd about the silence and quasi neglect you saw at the baby shower, but I think you assessed it correctly. Women can be quite unsupportive of one another and/or assume a defensive posture as though threatened. I find some social situations to be difficult to navigate. Fortunately there were those who felt they could be complimentary without losing their whole game. I guess it shows that the longer-known aquaintences are not necessarily the best friends.

[Guest]

Dutch, I think you got that right!

Many women are just so insecure or so jealous that they remain aloof rather than risk their vulnerability by speaking forth something kind and true about another person. We are so used to dissing others to make ourselves feel better that we fail to be nice to others. The television shows bear witness to this as we hear children making snide remarks about their parents and the adults cutting down one another.

When I give a compliment, it is usually not about how someone looks but about their effort, their ideas or their character as the reality of it is this: there are a lot of things that we cannot truly control about our looks.

We can change our hair color and hair style but we cannot control the thickness or the amount of hair that we have. Some people can afford to have corrective vision surgery or to purchase contact lenses and some of us must wear lenses as thick as the glass in the telescopes at the Mt. Palomar Observatory. Some of us can be Diet Divas and still have thick ankles or shapeless waists and hips. We can have the style sense of Versace, Baroni or Ermenegildo Zegna but the clothing budget of Wally World or Goody's.

While we DO want to know that our grooming efforts have paid off, it is good to acknowledge those physical attributes about a person, if and when they are appropriate but I prefer to elevate the other aspects about a person. Always the compliment must be truthful and not contrived - the person receiving it will know if it is not genuine.

If only everyone in our worlds could be as truthful, kind and generous with praise as the MakeMeThinner Forum of Friends, eh? You People are awesome because you build up one another and also poke us when we need it!

[DutchChoc]

That's a great, thorough, and wonderful response. If I didn't always feel rushed, MAYBE I could say something as well as you did. And, maybe not, but the point is that I agree totally.

I feel similarly about complimenting; YOU described exactly what I think. Your example about some people having style and no budget is so true, and having a wonderful shape and no style and no budget is possible, too. We can only hope to be recognized for the parts that we're able to pull together, I guess, and it's the "kind" people who will try to -- as you say --elevate that best aspect. To ignore or downplay everything that a person has to offer is disappointing.

[Nancy]

Dutch,

Did that smidge of fluff fall off yet? I am waiting to celebrate with you when you reach 134. Honestly, you MUST look so good right now! You and I are the same height. If I weighed 125 I would be bones. We must be organized differently, Kid. I know I could use some carving off the thighs and hip areas but I am through. I think my remaining fatty area must just hang out there because it has been with me for so many years. It doesn't want to abandon ship and leave.

I cracked up about the 'bra fat' you mentioned in one of your posts. I could USE some of that...I tried on my leopardy bathing suit the other night when I tried out my snorkel and fins at my friend's pool...I look like a boy wearing a leopard suit...my water wings have disappeared. I hope I still float.

[sudaoning]

LOL

Nancy I am SOOOOO happy to hear that water wings go too!