The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Starloser63]

Just wanted to let everyone know that I did ok yesterday! Truly I did great :!:

But I have a 15 year old daughter and now she thinks she is all knowing. She suddenly thinks she is smarter that her dad and I and she thinks she knows how to raise her little sister(2.5 y/o) better than me also. This attitude of hers can drive me to drink... I am not a drinker, so I would turn to food. I have found out the; her stressing me, makes me want to eat! This morning I had my shake at 4:30am as usual then my demon child got up... By the time I got her to school at 6:15am I felt like eating... HER! I have already made my chili and had a chili salad for my 2nd meal. Folks we are talking 7:00am in the morning! I made extra because I was afraid this would be a bad day!

Why or why do I have to be pushed, when I just was trying to get rid of my "fat brain"? Don't worry I am going to survive, but I thought it was going to be easier, at least yesterday afternoon I was thinking that. SHEESH!

Hugs,
Susan

[pinkgeek]

Hey Susan!

I was just going to check in on you when I saw your post. Congrats on making it through the first day. I don't have children, so I don't know exactly what you are experiencing. But the eating thing is a habit right? So now we have to find a new habit like doing laundry when we are stressed or getting a punching bag, or something right? I, like a lot of us here I think, have this need to sit around munch when no one is home and I'm just doing nothing and watching TV. My husband left the other day to do something and it was so weird, I was sitting there watching TV and got up and went into the kitchen OUT OF HABIT...I was like jeez! What do you think you are doing? You aren't hungry and you don't get another supplement for awhile...So I went back in and continued watching TV (afterall, I have to learn to be okay in "normal" situations without food) and while I was watching, I kept thinking...I'm going to get on a roller coaster and fit this year, I'm going to wear cute clothes, I'm going to be healthier and feel better about myself. Like Jeanette said before, if not now, when? Now is the time. Don't be afraid to use self-talk. You are probably your own worst enemy, but also your own best friend. Also, we are here It feels good to say that Talk yourself down from giving in. Food is an inanimate object...it will not continue to control you. Hope this helps!

~Angela

[Starloser63]

Angela,

Thanks a bunch. I have plenty of other stuff to do. Thank heavens sitting with nothing to do during the day is not one of my problems. I did mention I have a 2.5 year old, she never stops!!! I have decided to divide my day up; I get up at 4:30am, start getting ready for day hubby leaves for work, then 15 y/o has to be taken to school. Then Addie and I come home. I start with checking my emails and posts. Then I'll do has work in between it's easiest that way. After lunch is now going to be my Addie time! Believe it or not my worse time is evenings when everyone is home and eating! This is still tough but my new mind set seem to help me with this.

But I have no mind set for 15 year old know it alls! I will come up with one. When I do I will be rich because I can't be the only one with this problem. So I will write a book and make millions helping everyone else out. Now doesn't that sound like a plan?

Seriously, I haven't had anything but what I was suppose to have. I at the chili at 7:00am which was only 30 min early for my next shake. But it was way early for my chili meal!

Hope things are going good for you today Angela, What day are you on? Thanks for thinking of me.

Hugs,
Susan

[Landylue]

You said, "This attitude of hers can drive me to drink... I am not a drinker, so I would turn to food. I have found out the; her stressing me, makes me want to eat!"

Susan, the very first step on the road to recovery is embedding this truth into your very spirit: "I am responsible for my feelings. I am responsible for how I react to the words and the actions of others. I am responsible for not attempting to smother my anger, fear, or pain with food. No one can make me feel angry, unworthy, or stressed unless I allow them to do so, and I choose not to allow them to do so. I am responsible for me."

Envision a huge sailing ship in the middle of the ocean. The captain has no control over the wind, waves or weather, but he CAN control how he reacts to those things in the way he sets the sails or manipulates the rudder. The captain is still able to go in the direction where she wants the ship to go.

Your 15-year old child does NOT have control over whether YOU choose to let go of the program. YOU DO!

You CAN do this, Susan. We've got your back. Don't let go!

Landylue

[Starloser63]

Your 15-year old child does NOT have control over whether YOU choose to let go of the program. YOU DO!

You CAN do this, Susan. We've got your back. Don't let go!

Landylue

Dear Landylue,

I never meant to say she was controlling me. I was expressing my feelings, would "murder" have made it clearer? It was the TENSION I was feeling that was the problem. I knew what I had to do to stay on plan so I came home and at Chili salad at 7:00 in the morning. Glad to say I didn't want make next shake until almost 11:00am. I did the right thing and I did not go off my plan.
I would never blame any of my behaviors on my children, we get enough of our own baggage as we grow up, I would never dream of making her(them) responsible for my actions. What would Jesus say to me when it came time to answer for my behaviors in my life?

I am in control of what I do on this plan! I was just venting. I hope you can rest easy now. Hugs to you!

Susan

[shineface]

Hey Susan!!!

Hang in there baby --- and just remember there is a reason tigers eat their young!!!!!!

Having walked the road you are describing -- actually sometimes having crawled thru it --- I certainly can relate with your frustration and in retrospect I can NOW have a sense of humor about it --- like years ago picturing duck tape across fifteen year old mouths ... except I know the "state lady" would've crucified me for one act of unreasonable frustration!!!! Please, I hope no one takes offense -- this is my opinion, experience, "warped" sense of humor and survivor tactics!!!!! I love all children and have nor would ever harm any one of them --- but sometimes the fantasy of just stopping the unsolicited advice on everything you do from a teenager can really keep you going!!!! LOL My husband used to say it's all nice and manageable when the kids are small and you can keep them in your sight and control their environment and keep them safe from harm.... one day you wake up and they are out on their own - quoting friends and friends parents and teachers and looking at you like you are the most clueless adult in the free world!!!!! What happen to the looks of absolute adoration and acceptance --- suddenly, you pray everytime they leave your sight hoping that they will remain safe and wonder why you can't fasten them to a lolly column in the basement so that you can get a nights sleep without worrying about who they are with, if they are safe driving, riding in a car, walking through the Mall ---- the kids get "smarter" as they get older and more brave ... we got "stupider" and afraid ---- but it does get better, believe it or not, it is true --- I think Mark Twain said that it was amazing how as HE grew older, his FATHER got smarter.
Kids, God love them all -my opinion-- they are the biggest blessing we may receive and they can be the biggest frustration that we may have --- and when eating is our response to frustration or boredom or fear or aggravation --- this is all part of the BIG PICTURE when we are developing new LIFE skills for coping - other than eating.
I know that ... If I don't re-train - I will re-gain!!!!

God love you Susan--- raising kids is the hardest job we'll ever love -- and just remember back to the days your mother must have said (mine always did) -- wait until you have your kids - I hope they're half as difficult on you as you are on me!!! Gee, thanks Mom!

You are doing great and remember...

WE WILL do this together!!!

[Starloser63]

Thank You so much Pam,

Duct Tape Hmmmmmmm!

I was afraid that I had actually been going thru this differently then everyone else. I just assumed we all felt like with our children. Today was a better day and we had a talk last night of course, it is always calm here the day after we've been to church.

I am glad for everyone's support.

Hugs,
Susan

[explorthis]

I have a 15 year old daughter and now she thinks she is all knowing. She suddenly thinks she is smarter that her dad and I and she thinks she knows how to raise her little sister (2.5 y/o) better than me also

Landylue said: first step on the road to recovery is embedding this truth into your very spirit:
I am responsible for my feelings.
I am responsible for how I react to the words and the actions of others.
I am responsible for not attempting to smother my anger, fear, or pain with food. No one can make me feel angry, unworthy, or stressed unless I allow them to do so, and I choose not to allow them to do so.
I am responsible for me."

Pam said: God love you Susan--- raising kids is the hardest job we'll ever love -- and just remember back to the days your mother must have said (mine always did) -- wait until you have your kids - I hope they're half as difficult on you as you are on me!!! Gee, thanks Mom!

Susan, I am in about the same kid-age-boat as you. A 13 y/o daughter and a 2-1/2 y/o daughter. The 13 y/o has miraculously become the parent, and the 2-1/2 y/o seems to think the older is her Mom. I do agree w/you they can trigger duct-tape-tempting-tee-totaling thoughts of immediate self gratification. My eldest has a mind of her own, thank God. I was never a backseat driver. I have always been a leader and she (Alix) is on the same path. Though times are trying, they are all worth it. I have occasionally imagined what if I did not have the older one to assist, or help. I can not even imaging. In her own way, she thinks she is doing the right thing. Know what? She is. Where would I be with out either of them?

Landylue kept using the phrase: “I am responsible” Well, this is 150% true. I am the one that brought them into this world. I am the one that nurtures them. I am the one that loves them like no one else. I am the one that protects them. I am the one that will protect them up to and including my death. I AM THE DAD. I created these 2 circumstances, and my family is the most important thing in my life. I chose to savor every moment of every day, because these times are short. Yes I want to ring the 13 y/o’s neck on occasion, but this quickly passes, just like a craving for a specific food. Alix will be a teen soon, and I will become second in her plans. The 2-1/2 y/o Niki mirrors the actions of Alix, and is growing up all to fast. Again, I created these two lives, and I would not trade one second of any day to miss this. I am the parent. I am the one that is RESPONSIBLE, hard as it might be. We are lucky.

Pam says it is the hardest job we will ever love – how true. I could not ever imagine not carrying a roll of duct tape in my hand. I could never imagine not having my kids. My Mom additionally says the exact same thing as Pam’s – Thank god you have smart kids, now you can understand what I got to go thru. Thank god for Grandma.

I love life. Can you tell? I love my family, I love being a Dad. I love Medifast and what it has done for this Dad. I am only 42. I am experiencing a NEW life for the first time. I am glad I have the energy, the drive, and the will to be a good Dad with a new lease on life.

Be patient with Medifast, and your family. They are both worth every second of every day, I promise!!!

-Mike

[Starloser63]

Mike,

As always your wisdom comes shining through! You are right they are mine and I helped create them. I love them more than I could ever rightly express. I am very thankful for my whole life and all the good Lord has given me. I am on the road to being a thinner parent that is able to do more with my jewels. I am only 40 and I want to be able to do all things with them. Now I have the "I can'ts" to much for my liking.

I can definately say I am so over yesterday! Samantha is a sweetie and I would not want to change her in anyway, just turn down her mouth sometimes. She is a good Christian girl and as a parent I couldn't be prouder. Addie is always saying she is going to be like "seesaw". I am alright with that. Samantha is a great kid. She just drives me crazy sometimes.

Thanks for all the support. This is a great group of people and I am glad to be part of this group.

Hugs to you all,
Susan