DogMa

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Postby Carrie » February 8th, 2007, 7:34 pm

Biki,

I totally agree.

It's tough to put yourself out there and run the risk of rejection - flip side - not putting yourself out there is a form of 'self-rejection'. I've been in both places.

I can tell you though that until recently I just had not dated much - and it seemed like every time a dating situation ended I was very disappointed and hurt. I would wonder what was wrong with me and just automatically assume it was some shortcoming or flaw of mine that was to blame.

But then I just threw caution to the wind and started dating a lot. And a funny thing happened. Sometimes it would just be a first date, sometimes something more serious. But by 'practicing' it I learned not to take it all so much too heart. (and I'm not making any sort of assumption about the level Robin's relationship is at- or downplaying that at all). When something would end, by my choice or his, of course it was disappointing, but I stopped BLAMING myself so much for it, and decided it just meant we simply weren't right for each other at that time. And if that was the case, I didn't want to waste time with someone who wasn't right for me, because while I was horsing around with him, the right one might go unnoticed. It really took a lot of the pressure off, and it was much more positive.

I just interpreted Robin as being somewhat afraid of telling him, and very conscious of her issues. And I think we are all perfectly lovable regardless of what we're carrying around.

Obviously, I hope it goes well!
Now: 2/5/07: 233.6/220.0/145
1st time: 3/1/04, from 266.5 to 195.4
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Postby bikipatra » February 8th, 2007, 8:29 pm

I understand your point Carrie but Dogmas's issues aren't too many dates and picking and choosing but cutting and running before she even knows. This is her longest dating relationship ever and can be a great growth opportunity for her. I wish her the best as well.
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Postby Lauren » February 9th, 2007, 7:25 am

Geez, Robin, are you sure you wanted your love life analyzed like this?
:-)

Have fun with whatever you decide. Life's way too short to not enjoy the hills and valleys.

Cheers!

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Postby DogMa » February 9th, 2007, 8:21 am

Ha. Well, notice I left out the actual issue. That's really just not forum material.

But OK, so maybe it's more phone call than e-mail. But phone call while I'm away in Denver. (Then again, maybe I should just not say anything till it comes up.) I think I'm going to consult my cousin when I'm in Denver. She has a doctorate in psychology and used to be a therapist before she had kids. And she already knows all the specifics.

And no, I'm definitely not seeing him just to be seeing someone. If I were like that, I'd have had more relationships than this. I'm far from desperate; most of the time, I have no problem being single.
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Postby bikipatra » February 9th, 2007, 9:10 am

DogMa wrote:Ha. Well, notice I left out the actual issue. That's really just not forum material.


And no, I'm definitely not seeing him just to be seeing someone. If I were like that, I'd have had more relationships than this. I'm far from desperate; most of the time, I have no problem being single.

I hope you didn't think I was implying that-I said you were much too smart to do that.
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Postby DogMa » February 9th, 2007, 9:20 am

No, no, I was agreeing with you. I AM too smart for that.
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Postby bikipatra » February 9th, 2007, 9:26 am

DogMa wrote:No, no, I was agreeing with you. I AM too smart for that.

Great. Sometimes my comments are misinterpreted and I wanted to make sure!
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Postby DogMa » February 9th, 2007, 9:32 am

Oh, and almost forgot my normal update. All the way up to 131 today, but I'm assuming it's salt or something from the past few days. I'm just not going to worry about it, especially when I'm supposed to go out for bbq tonight.

Oh, and I got a prescription for Ambien CR, so I'm going to try it tomorrow night when I'm in Denver. I didn't want to take it for the first time on a work night, just in case, and I won't have much time to sleep tonight, between the date and getting ready for the trip and my early flight. Jdate's taking me to the airport and picking me up. He volunteered, and it actually makes sense this time because we can go straight to his birthday dinner when I come home. Otherwise I'd have to go home, deal with the dogs, leave them again (which, after a week away, will be hard), go eat, and then still get home and get some sleep before work the next morning. This way we can go eat, and then I can go home and relax with the dogs for a couple of hours before I have to go to sleep. I WILL need to kick him out early, though, so I can have some time.
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Postby bikipatra » February 9th, 2007, 9:35 am

I took Ambien CR last night. It is finally working now that I am not manic. I slept in more than I have in months. Just be warned it can give you a little bit of a sleepy hangover.
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Postby DogMa » February 9th, 2007, 11:14 am

Yeah, that's one of the things I was worried about. Didn't want to take it when I had to be up for work. Better to try it when I'm on vacation and don't have to get up early. Or make sense.
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Postby DogMa » February 9th, 2007, 11:41 am

YAY!!! DogMa one, cravings zero. I was craving a sandwich from the barbecue place down the street, even though we're having barbecue tonight, too. I've been going back and forth all morning about it, and then got two big compliments on some work I did. So I was all set to celebrate and just have the sandwich. I had my purse in my hand - and then decided to skip it and have the South Beach wrap kit I brought.

So yay for me!!
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Postby bikipatra » February 9th, 2007, 12:53 pm

That is great! Congrats. I just has a supplement and two glasses of water but a barbeque sammich still sounds awfully good to me!
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Postby DogMa » February 9th, 2007, 1:11 pm

Yeah, I'm still going to have it. But not for a few weeks. Assuming I start running again on Sunday as scheduled, and IF I keep it up the week I'm gone and then the week I get back home, then yes, I get to have a sandwich from the barbecue place.
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Postby alpha femme » February 13th, 2007, 12:23 am

what's going on, miss robin?
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Postby DogMa » February 13th, 2007, 10:04 am

Sorry, I'm away in Denver and just haven't had time to check in for a few days.

Not much to report. I've been terrible about food since I got here, and I'm not sure why. I'm starting to think it's the stupid Ambien. It does make me sleep through the night, but I'm waking up tired and groggy, and I don't like that feeling. So I think I'm going to skip it tonight and try to just sleep on my own. My running has also been off. Sunday morning I was all set to run and realized I'd brought my running bra and shorts and shoes, but no T-shirt. I don't wear one at home, so I guess I didn't even think about it. So I borrowed one from my cousin, and yesterday morning I got a really nice run/walk in.

But then last night I went out with a friend and didn't get back till pretty late (she's still on the night shift). Took the Ambien, slept later than normal, and woke up feeling really, really groggy. It was bad enough that I actually was a little nervous about being on a treadmill, so I decided not to even try. I have GOT to be better about food today, though. So I'm going to try my best today (with the biggest challenge being that I'm going to a hockey game tonight), and tonight I'm going to skip the Ambien and see if that helps.

I know I haven't really gained much, if anything, but I'm bloated (all that salt from restaurant food, plus more carbs than I would normally have) and I feel HUGE right now. And I don't like that feeling, so I need to get things back under control.
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