down 3.2 lbs! yay
i was scared to get on the scale because i did bad friday, even though i did better this weekend
. so seeing that made me feel awesome. im 1.4 lbs away from when i tried on my wedding gown and it wont be in for another 2-3 weeks or a month. So YAY hehe. working at ulta yesterday went good, i was a lil overwhelmed at first. ( they sorta left me alone in the fragrances, something i really dont have a clue about and i dont know much about the rest of the stuff there right now other than makeup ) but then i talked to the manager and asked if its more or less, learning as i go along and she smiled and said yea. I was on the register for a bit, which im actually pretty comfortable with (naturally, being a closet computer nerd). my feet hurt sooooo bad after 6 hours of standing
OWWIE! oh well, losing weight will be good for my legs, maybe not make my feet hurt less though.
saturday we had dinner with my friend linda, her husband and their sons. her husband is marrying us and is a local mayor
it was really great seeing her again and catching up and talking wedding plans. Im very excited about it
well...onto the bad stuff....normally people would be happy hearing this but i was beyond pissed, nauseated, angry, sickened...etc
my sister is pregnant. ill back up and explain why this upsets me. she already has TWO kids that my mother takes care of! my mother that is almost 60 now and completely stressed and has horrible problems with her legs since she gained so much weight from all the stress my sister gives her.
my cousin found out she was pregnant a couple months back and i even said i was worried this would happen because im getting married and rachel is having a baby allison is jealous that there is no spotlight on her. I wanted to call her last night and scream obscenities. all she cares about is herself and she thinks that maybe this will get the family to help her out like they used to. what she really is doing it pushing my mom and aunt who are not in good health one step closer to their grave. my aunt told me she feels so sick everytime she thinks about it.
I get so scared of them being gone one day, especially my aunt though because she has always been the one to hold everyone together, and my mother i feel like i am watching her get worse and worse. im going to see about taking my oldest nephew on or two days this week from her just to give her a break. i feel bad that i cant be there to help out with them more.
roberts mom and i were talking and she said, i cant take on all these things as my problem, but sometimes its hard not to want to try and help everyone else out. i dont want to watch my nephews walk down the wrong road like their mother and i dont want to stand back as my sister kills my mother and aunt (in my eyes its exactly what she is doing by causing them so much hurt and stress from everything she does).
but in the end robert is going to be my main priority, my husband. and I cannot , repeat, cannot put him on the back burner just because my family feels like its in a mess right now.
ugh, i need to go get ready for work. im glad i posted this now rather than at work. this makes me just want to go cry. i feel like there isnt much i can do.