The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[Jeanette]

I have been on Medifast for five months--longer than any weight loss program in my life. I have been moderately successful--70 pounds in five months. I gets comments DAILY about my loss, enough to make your head swell.

There are times when I don't feel I deserve to have lost all this weight because I wasn't 100% faithful through the whole process. I have "cheated"--sometimes small, sometimes big. A bite here, a nibble there--a meal here, a meal there. I would justify it in my head by saying "I've lost 70 lbs--I can do whatever I want!" Who was I trying to fool?

I am angry with myself because I did not put myself first 100% of the time. Mike has said to me more than once in the last five months that I have known him that our time on Medifast is S-H-O-R-T compared to a lifetime of thinness. Why would I want to be fat one day longer than necessary??? I want to wear Victoria's Secret undies, and being off program is NOT going to help me!

So..it's back to basics for me. No more eating off program for any reason. I have 10 pounds to get rid of to be halfway to goal, and I am going to do that by May 10, my six month anniversary on Medifast.

I'm sharing this with all of you for many reasons (one of them being that Guido threatened me if I didn't! ), but the main reason is this: I am human. I fail. I need you--all of you--to be successful.

Thanks for listening.

[Carrie]

Heya Jeanette,

This really must be 'Diet Difficulty Week'. Most everyone seems to be struggling right now. I had a bad weekend and am still absolutely obsessing about food. What makes me crazy is that up until last Friday I had over 2 weeks of smooth sailing - it wasn't difficult to stick to my plan at all - and then POOF! along comes Friday and I'm struggling through every minute. It seems like cruel and unusual punishment doesn't it?

Change is hard. It is natural for us to mightily resist change. If it wasn't so hard nobody would have any major problems (i.e. alcoholism, drug addiction, big credit card bills, failed relationships, etc etc). I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT WE CHANGE IN THE SPACE OF A MOMENT. I believe we make a concerted effort to make a change and then we move forward only to experience difficulty and slide backwards, which requires the reassertion of our intention and the committment to move forward again.

Imagine a big coil or spring and we're at the bottom. When we decide to change we move up a bit, and then eventually we slide back down a bit, and we have to keep working at it, but eventually we do make our way up the coil. I just don't think people make major changes in a small space of time. Mike is a really good example of this. Most of us see him, talk to him, read his posts and we're thinking 'That lucky so-and-so, he's done it, he's done the ULTIMATE' And we wish fervently to get where he is. But the fact of the matter is that Mike, though his body has changed as he wanted it to, is still dealing with this psychologically. He still has a brain full of 'fat thoughts' that he lives with. And hey, I am not in any way saying I wouldn't prefer to be in his shoes RIGHT NOW. What I'm saying is that THIS IS A PROCESS. The last time I was in therapy my psychologist told me about 'change-back'. It's the natural reaction to efforts to make positive change. We attempt something and sooner or later WHAMO our self-defense mechanisms kick in with 'change-back' and try to get us to revert to our old ways.

Being fat has worked for all of us on some level for a long time now. And it is a major component of who we are. (ie. If I'm not Carrie the fat girl then who am I?) For years I have spent the majority of my time thinking about what I was going to eat, what people were thinking of me, where my next meal was coming from, how sick I was of being fat, etc etc etc. It defines me. And I am trying to take all that away from myself.

I also think that's why we have difficulty at milestone moments. I'm at the weight right now that I've gotten down to a few other times, but never manage to get below (at least not for years). And I think my change-back has kicked in to resist me.

I realize it isn't realistic to change years and years of ingrained behavior in a few months. What I am hedging my bet with is that if I fight the old behavior long enough it will eventually give way to the new behavior. Sure I wish I hadn't had the bad days, but they aren't the end of the world, I can carry on, they will pass, and good days are on the way. If I can temper the bad days with some form of self control, I can ride them out until they pass and I get back to the good days when I don't struggle.

You should not feel like a failure. You should feel proud of yourself. The only way you can be a failure is if you completely abandon your plan and give up.

The reality for me is that I am not going to be one of those people who never 'cheats'. If I had an all or nothing attitude about this I would've given up long ago. But a realistic reality (for me anyway) is to work my hardest on altering my behavior. (minimizing off-program eating, and recovering from it when it happens. Let's face it - my behavior of occasional slips is oodles better than 2 months ago when I binged every day). It may take me longer than I would like to reach my goal, but that is better than abandoning my program altogether. Much as I hate it, I have no magic wand to 'make this all go away', I'm gonna have to work for it.

You are on the right path, you are getting there. Don't give up.
Carrie

[Tonya]

Five months and 70 pounds is a great accomplishment!! You should be so proud of yourself that you have stuck with it (even/especially with the slip ups) I've only been on this for a few weeks and I cannot stop thinking about food. I'm absolutely amazed at the tenacity that some of you have shown and I know that one day soon you will be able to look in the mirror and smile!

Just take those compliments to heart and allow them to get you excited! Just imagine those people's faces next month...and the next....and the next! This definitely is not a lot of fun but remember -

The chief cause of unhappiness is trading what you want most for what you want now. (I got that from one of the other members but I just love it so I have it on a post-it note next to my bed)

If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got!

[elle4nelly]

Jeanette?

First of all, stop being so hard on yourself. No one and I mean no one is perfect. you have lost 70lbs and that's what matter most. Yeah...on the way down, you nibbled here and there...
Does that make you less of a success? NO! not all!
Be gentle and understanding of yourself. Be flexible with yourself. you are a strong and beautiful woman. You have a lot determination for you have passed the mark at which millions quit their diets. (less than 21 days). Get rid of your feelling of unworthiness and inner guilt..these are leftovers from your chilhood battles. Recognize them, deal with them gently and move forward.
But don't set yourself up for dissapointment by having these stringent rules. The" all or nothing attitude" can be dangerous when dieting because there will or might be a day where you will lapse...and if you're bent on having that ' all or nothing" mode...you might find yourself ..thinking...well...I said I wouldn't ..now I did it...forget about it...I 'll just quit!
get the point?
So My dear Jeanette, be kind to you..breathe..Spring is here...take a walk and deep breath...
It will be alright....nibbles or not...you are a sucess!

Nelly

[explorthis]

Carrie:…For years I have spent the majority of my time thinking about what I was going to eat, what people were thinking of me, where my next meal was coming from, how sick I was of being fat, etc etc etc. It defines me. And I am trying to take all that away from myself. Let's face it - my behavior of occasional slips is oodles better than 2 months ago when I binged every day.

Carrie, you’re not alone. Your description above is me to a tee. Exactly, what was I going to eat. When? How Much? What are others thinking about me. Sick of being fat etc. etc. etc. I bet most all of us here are reading themselves in this description.

Nellie:… First of all, stop being so hard on yourself. But don't set yourself up for dissapointment by having these stringent rules. The" all or nothing attitude" can be dangerous when dieting because there will or might be a day where you will lapse...and if you're bent on having that ' all or nothing" mode...you might find yourself ..thinking...well...I said I wouldn't ..now I did it...forget about it...I 'll just quit!
get the point?

Nellie, I goaded Jeanette into posting this. Yes she has lost 70# and it is a major-wonderful-accomplishment. Here lies the problem: With so much to lose, she began to slide into complacency, as we all want to / or have, or might. This is a natural gut reaction to a lifetime of eating/bingeing. We have talked about the purist method (all shakes and nothing else) vs. the lean-spleen-green ones. My opinion – strictly my opinion, is that once you start adding alternate foods into your plan, weather it be a shred of lettuce, or a carefully weighed piece of meat (as allowed on the program) or a bar (again allowed) with the time it takes to lose a substantial amount of weight, you hit a “boredom/complacency” phase as she has. With this came a few more added items, what those were, were not important. The reason she posted was to promise to herself in front of the congregation her new found commitment to the program. She was not really “being hard on herself” just looking for a new cornerstone to stand on. She as you and the others are here for support, and for “been there done that” stories, thus her post, and her reason to try a new avenue. 6 months is ALONG time, but life is ALONG-ER time.

-Mike

[Guest]

Mike?

Your last sentence was what I needed to hear...I have reached a boredom stage and I am so over dieting and wanting to be at goal NOW!!! and not next week or next month..and I have been posting left and right about this boredom disease and this impatience cancer..
Don't know why I hit this mental plateau...I really want to get off of it before I get off the diet instead!

And here you are saying:" 6 months is a long time but lifetime is longer"

WOAW????

Months of dieting can feel so long...but what is it to a lifetime of being thin if I stick to it?


Thanks Mike...maybe if I repeat this eanough...I'll come off the "i'm bored and so over dieting plateau"

Nelly

[Starloser63]

Jeanette,

I am so glad you posted. I was thinking about you this morning. I am glad you are getting recommitted 100% for you! You are a gem and I am glad to have you as a Medifast Buddy!

You have been a big inspiration to me and I want to be here for you. I know you will get to your goal and you are lucky to have such a good buddy in MIKE!

Take care and keep shaking! You are doing WONDERFULLY!!!!

Hugs,
Susan F

[SneezyKitten]

Jeanette,

I am so glad you posted this! I have been off the program since mid-February and got there by doing the same thing: a bite of this, a bite of that etc etc etc.

I have been kicking myself because I could have been much closer to my goal weight by now and I could have been wearing a cute summer outfit now that we are having 80+ and 90+ degree temperatures here. I could have impressed my family and friends when I go home to see them next week. But instead I am re-losing weight I gained back.

It is very disappointing - but there is triumph in a return to the program and victory WILL be yours, victory WILL be mine too - the most important thing is now, today. What are we doing TODAY so as to not end up slowing or diminishing our progress?

So thanks again Jeanette. I read your posts and Mike's posts and some of the other seasoned vet's and it helps to be reminded that you are human too. Besides...70 pounds is nothing to scoff at!

Anna-Marie
206/(188)192.5/127

[Landylue]

Most of us would K I L L to be at that marvelous 70 lb marker--or even to be halfway to our goal.

You are an inspiration to us all, Jeanette. You and Nancy, being women, give the rest of us women out here REAL hope that we can one day achieve what you two have. We totally understand what a hard row to hoe that you have tackled. And we are in awe.

Thank you for all you bring to this forum, Jeanette.

Landylue

[Nancy]

Hi, Kids ~

I how you one another and also how you hold one another accountable. This Forum is working just the way it was intended!

I'm gonna refer you to several of Linda Spangle's books, not because you can order them through our website here at MakeMeThinner.com but because they are so very helpful. The Lifestyles, the Medifast Program of Patient Support and Life is Hard, Food is Easy are superb!

For those of us with food/eating/weight issues, this IS a life-long battle.

Yep, indeedy doo I lost 130 pounds, yep, I’ve maintained that weight loss for over a year but please hear me: the last two months have been agony for me.

I shall not go into detail nor do I wanna make excuses but the last 7 weeks have been worse than my first week on the program!

Medifast is wonderful, it works, I love it, I use it every day, I feel wonderful, I look wonderful, but for ME, Leopard Woman (aka Nancy Pettit) lookin’ like this is a DAILY battle.

Will it be the cheesecake and truffles that win or the green salad without ranch dressing?

Will it be the deep fried halibut fish and chips and clam chowder and cole slaw or will it be the grilled halibut, steamed veggies and green salad?

I have not always been successful in choosing the thin way. Even though I am on maintenance, there are some things that I must do: I weigh every day, I wear clothing that really fits my bod (NO stretchy waist pants ‘cept my leopard print jammy pants), I always eat breakfast and I exercise most days.

But now hear this: I have blown it lately.

I told you that I have been very busy, felt really stressed out about a few issues and have fallen back to my old BM (before Medifast) habit of not eating every three hours, I have not been slurpin' my water and I HAVE scarfed way too much bread and candy! There. I confessed it to the whole world!

Unca pinched me. I was worried he was lookin’ for flab on my waistline!!

Jeanette, like you, I have not me best or me enough to take the time to eat on time. I am up a few pounds and today is day number three on the program for me.

This is the first time that I have gotten really freaked about it because I allowed myself way too many nibbles.

Then I rationalized! You know how it goes when ya start lookin' at yourself and the little evil voice says, "Go ahead, you look pretty darn good. It's okie dokie to have that half a loaf of bread with jam..."

Summer is coming and that means bathing suits, shorts, capris pants, tube tops! OR bathing costumes (bathing suits with skirts that reach your knees), bagaloons and tent tops.

Guys don't like to hafta wear t-shirts over their bathing trunks and hide under billowy aloha shirts either. Some of them have never let the sun shine on their chests because they are ashamed to remove their shirt in public because their woadies are as big as Dolly's...

Boredom comes with the plan when you're on it for a long time.
Occasional slip ups are normal. The important thing is to NOT rationalize because eventually, we will be right back where we were.

Don’t avoid the scale. Weigh. Face the truth. Take action and stop the cycle. Do it NOW!

Where will ya be in one month if you keep doing what you are doing right now? How about in a year from now?

Do your taste buds know how chips, cheesecake, ice cream, candy, bread ‘n jam taste? Of course they do! They’ve tasted that stuff so many times. Will it be around in six months from now? In a year from now will you be able to still purchase Lay’s tater chips? OF COURSE!

DO those things taste as good as thin feels? NO WAY!

DO those foody things taste as good as the compliments of co-workers and friends? NO WAY!

IF you are getting compliments from your co-workers and family, be ye glad!
Revisit your goals, post them - announce them like Jeanette, Tami, Sneezy, etc. and I have - get right back on track!

WHY are you doing this?

Read chapter 6 on “Cues and Controls” and chapter 10 “The Behavior Chain” in the Lifestyles book.

We are in the process of becoming who we were created to be!

Gentle Readers, this is where we get our support and where we give it.

There are times we need Guido to give us noogies

and there are times we need the Hugster to come alongside of us.

You are worth it.

Life is to be enjoyed.

This is not a rehearsal. (Let's do it right. Let's live long and prosper. Let's our life and not loathe it!)

You choose the party you attend.

Nothing tastes as good as thin feels.

One shake at a time, you’re changing your health, your shape and your life!

(for those of you that thrive on negatory thoughts: one bite of cheesecake at a time and you are changing your health, your shape and your life expectancy…)

Now Kids, get outta the kitchen, avoid the commercials (too foody), drink some water, read your list of why you are doing this and call someone!

May the shake be with you!
Thindom happens.

[susan]

Jeanette.
I to have been strugling and right now it is harder for me than it has been in almost 7 months. read my post in the wt. room I need help. but you are doing great why do we get in this state of mind after all these months.help.
susan

[Nancy]

Susan, 'nette, and others ~

We've been at it for a long time and there comes a point where our friends and family tell us how good we look and ask us when we are going to stop.

I personally think they start getting nervous that we will be such awesome folks and they begin to feel a snort jealous! We hear everyone tell us that we have such great will power, that we look good, etc. and we think, "well, dang! I DO look great! Maybe I'll stop now."

We also begin to think about eating again. Boredom sets in.

Make your salad really special. Try some different flavors of Mrs. Dash seasoning on your salad or grilled chicken.

Drink your shake out of a crystal goblet. Make it creamy and dreamy in the blender.

Now is the time to refocus on your goal. Go all the way to you goal. Don't stop short.

Once you reach your goal then you begin transition.

DO transition properly.

This is going to be a life long venture. Getting healthy is one thing. Staying there is another animal!

We are intelligent people, we have been learning how much to eat and how often. We must really learn to eat what is good for our own body and our own metabolism and not a speck more. Those little bites, licks and tastes, nibbles here and nibbles there all add up to FLUFFINESS again if we are not careful.

We CANNOT ever go back to our old BM (before MEdifast) eating habits. If we do, Ta Da! We'll be right back where we were 7 months ago.

Alcoholics, gamblers, druggers, compulsive shoppers, etc. go to twelve step meetings all the time. They are in recovery. They are clean and sober, etc. but they are STILL alcoholics, they are STILL gamblers, etc.

Diabetics that are off of their medication STILL have diabetes - it is just in remission.

Every day these people must remember to do the right thing.

One day at a time.

Keep your goal ever before you.

WHY are you doing this?

What do YOU want MORE?

I KNOW that you are committed. You are NOT a quitter.

You are almost there. The finish line is in sight.

Your fans are standing along the sidelines, cheering you on.

We're here to offer you a cup of cool water and a towel for your sweaty brow.

The gold medal is polished and we are waiting to put it around your neck after you cross the line.

C U at the finish line, Susan, 'nette, EVERYONE!!

[Maggie]

I think someone has started an epidemic here. It seems like we are all having the same problems. After all, we are human. I am still in semi-control but that is not good enough. I have been on a break for health reasons but have been able to maintain my weight loss. I haven't been posting my problems because I am a private person, but I realize that maybe I could have still been a supporting factor for someone else who might be struggling. Today, I too, am fully committed to Medifast and to this forum. I appreciate everyone exposing their innerselves and their thoughts to this forum. I especially appreciate Nancy for being forthright with us and telling us that "leopard woman" is actually a human and has the same problems that we have. She didn't have to tell us that she has regained a few lbs. and for a time, loses control just like we do, but I'm glad she did.
Before I started Medifast one of the things that I did to get in the right frame of mind was make a list of 50 reasons why I wanted to lose weight. I want to share these reasons with you. Some of these reasons are very apparent. Some are a little private. I want to share these for 2 reasons. Reason # 1 is that in writing these I will reinforce in my mind the motivation I need to continue this plan and # 2 is that you may be able to relate to some of them and see the need in yourself. It might help you to stay on your plan. They are in no particular order of importance.

1 Walk without pain.
2 Walk without a cane
3 Climb the stairs ease.
4 Not get out of breathe when walking
5 Go window shopping
6 Push grocery cart instead of riding an electric cart
7 Get on knees to clean kitchen floor
8 Take a bubble bath instead of a shower
9 Get on floor to play with the kids
10 Be able to take better care of personal hygiene
11 Improve circulation in legs
12 Get rid of excess fluid
13 Wear jeans again
14 To be able to cross my legs
15 Go to church
16 Inspire others
17 Enjoy going on vacation
18 Go for a walk in the woods
19 Just be able to go for a walk anywhere
20 Improve health
21 Be able to do my own painting and wallpaper
22 Climb stepladder to wash windows
23 Slip on my shoes without using a long shoe spoon
24 Shop at regular stores for clothes
25 Make my family proud
26 Wear a dress again
27 Be able to fit in all chairs
28 Wear panty hose again
29 To be in control of my life
30 Live past 80 years
31 Be able to care for my husband
32 Lay down on the couch
33 Fit in a booth at a restaurant
34 Work outside with my flowers
35 Get more exercise
36 Be able to squat to pull weeds
37 Use car seat belt without an extender
38 Sit in plastic lawn chairs
39 Go to garage sales
40 Be an elction poll worker
41 Keep a cleaner house
42 Be a better sex partner
43 Work in my kitchen without having to sit on a stool
44 Get up at night without having to use a walker
45 To be able to weigh on the doctor's office scales
46 To not be a burden to others when I am old
47 To not have to go to a nursing home
48 To not have to be buried in a huge casket
49 To avoid the casket as long as I can!!!!
50 To be able to put on my wedding dress again
51 To renew our wedding vows on out 35th anniversary(this year)

Can you relate to any of these? Would anyone else like to add to my list.

Together we can make it happen. Maggie

[explorthis]

Some are a little private. I want to share these for 2 reasons. Reason #1 reinforce/motivation/continue
#2 relate/stay on your plan. Can you relate to any of these?

Maggie, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for this post. I am on the other side of the fence. Not so far away that I cannot remember, just the other day when I was struggling to lose the weight.

These 50 items relate exactly to reasons (for me) for maintaining after you reach the goal you have set. I found myself reading every one of the 50, at least 3 times. From a man’s point, other than a bit of “womanly” stuff in there, I related exactly to 30 of the 50, and have the same desires and reasons as you.

30 of 50 in order that relate to Mike:

1/3/4/9/10/13/14/16/17/19/22/24/25/27/29/30/32/33/34/35/36/38/42/45/46/47/48/49/50/51

I see all of these still in play, as NEW reasons to not gain the weight back. This is complete motivation. Lest I ever forget where I came from. I need motivation also. I see Nancy having the same troubles as you and the other congregation does, myself included. This only adds to the new-found-fuel I need to remember why I lost the weight in the first place.

I am printing the 50 reason’s and posting it on my fridge at home, so I never forget!

Thanks…

-Mike

[shineface]

Hey you all -- you're making me cry --- sitting here in this office -- doing my job -- waiting for someone to check in crying my eyes out....

I have never known people like you - the support, the love , THE HONESTY- YOU ARE WHY THIS PROGRAM WORKS -- do it - for you --- I struggle everyday not to take those bites -- HECK--- today I had to bake 8 loaves of lemon blueberry bread, a pistachio cake and 2 dozen raisin oatmeal cookies --- as part of my job .... I can't and won't even lick my finger --- if I do I'm a gonner and that scares the H-LL outta me!!!!!! I know how hard this is --- but we all need to be kinder to ourselves - reach out to ourselves with the wondertul hearts we reach out to others with --- darn - gotta go check in a guest -- better wipe my eyes or they're gonna wonder where they're checking into!!!!!!!

YOU ARE ALL WONDERFUL - Jeanette you are a wonder to me - and have been an inspiration from the day I found this forum you can do it --- we all really can - if we stop and care about ourselves.... best prayers and support to everyone I sending out lots of special love and energy for success!!!!!!!

LOVE YOU ALL____AND

WE WILL do this together!!!