The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[DogMa]

Geez, Alex, you make me look like a slacker!! But seriously, you look great and it sounds like you're doing great. Keep it up, but don't be such a stranger (it's OK to still be strange, though).

And YAY for the Ducks. I was on the edge of my seat last night. I'm dreading the next two games, though. West Coast games run SO late for me.

[alpha femme]

go, ducks, go!

[bikipatra]

Alex, the queen of subtlety!

[dede4wd]

Hi Alex,
So great to hear from you! Don't be a stranger!

D

[alpha femme]

lateral raises are my enemy.

[alpha femme]

the good ol' days...

[DogMa]

OMG, I HATE lateral raises. Sigh. And lunges.

I like bicep curls for some reason, though. Go figure.

[alpha femme]

i love working on my triceps. i know it won't help my wings, but it's done amazing things for my over-all strength.

okay. here it is. i'm just about ready to restart and try to see if i can dro another 40# or so. after 6-8 weeks of working out hard, calorie-cycling up to about 2000 a day, and then cutting back, i think my metabolism is closer to normal. most of this, of course, is do the the added muscle, but i can't build without taking in more calories.

ugh.

it's so damn unfair. well, no. i ate myself up to 400#, so i earned this... it's totally fair. but, my body is a mess. my things look huge. the thing is, when i flex the muscle, you can see it. you can feel it. if you run your fingers over my knees, it feels like nothing more than muscle and bone. why, then, am i stuck size 14 or 16 pants? it's because i have about 20# of loose skin, most of which is located on my upper arms, hips, and thighs.

it's humiliating. now, my tummy pudge? oh, that's all mine. the fat on my calves? thanks to genetics, all mine. but my upper arms are horrible, and my butt and thighs look like they are melted and dripping off me. they are even all wrinkly and nasty when i stand up straight.

maybe adding the muscle is as much to compensate as it is to revv my metabolism; when people touch my arm, they always end up squeezing it, surprised at how firm it is under the flap-o-flesh. a co-worker has taken to patting my abdomen every time he sees me, because he says it feels like touching pillow-covered turtle-shell and he ends up working out (sometimes with me), because his gf has threatened to respond to my flirting.

but... my trainer and doctor have both said that i have at least 20# of loose skin that will need to be removed. the md is trying to think of ways to get the insurance to cover it next year. the trainer is working at hard as she can to help me tighten my core... but it hurts. i mean, it physically hurts. when i write on the board in class, (aside from the humiliation of knowing my flap is flying) it feels like a have 10# weights clamped to each arm, hanging and swinging. when i run, the pull and swing of the skin on my ass and thighs actually makes my stomach hurt.

sometimes i just want to cry and get super fat again, because at least i knew who i was then, and i didn't feel like i was renting a body that somebody else had trashed and returned.

this is such and incomplete, random post. i just don't post crap like this on lilly's blog because the crazy ex reads it 2-3x a day... and, maybe, a couple of you in here know what i mean.

[j0j0ruca]

I wanna get my wings clipped. Maybe we can get a 2 for 1 deal? Vic said the healing time was like 3 months and you had to have your arms in a funny 90 degree angle - but who knows maybe advancements have been made. I've invested in a ton of shrugs and bolero jackets to help hide the wings. At Dland or Vegas I'll show them but never at work.

And your Dr can probably work something out. My one good friend at work was told by her Dr (kaiser no less) that if she lost 25 lbs he would ok her for a tummy tuck for "medical reasons" - of course she never attempted to loose. I'd have been all over that.

[Lauren]

Hey, Alex -

Yeah, I know how frustrating this part is, I totally am living it like you - although you've come even further and achieved even greater success! I like to call this period "purgatory." It's that in between time where I am so much better than where I was, but don't feel "at home" in my skin, because I don't believe that my body accurately reflects me - the skin is a bit of a mask of all the muscle and strength and success beneath it. But don't let the image or the physical realities impact your pride, you have to remind yourself everyday that this is somehow a badge of honor - for me, it's a temporary one, as I am already fully in the midst of selecting a surgeon to get breasts/tummy/and then we'll see, done.

Here are a couple logistical ideas that work for me, and that may help you in terms of comfort in running and such. I only wear the running tights - long or capri, the kinds that are tight with zippers at the bottom, usually some markings to make you glow in the night - I buy Danskin, Under Armour, Addidas, all made with a lycra/spandex/poly blend that is designed for running and moisture-wicking, and does a FANTASTIC job of sucking everything in, and preventing things from flying to and fro! :-) An added benefit is that I pull the tops of the running pant up way high - think Urkel - so that it also grabs in my tummy skin stuff, so everything is comfortably tucked in. For tops, I generally wear all Under Armour, and they have one body type line called "Compression," which does just that. It holds everything in. So, not only do I totally look 100% the runner, the actual truth is that everything is held in place and I don't have the problem of skin chafing or flapping or running away from me!

Remember this, too, all the fitness and health you are achieving is having a terrific impact, the skin would be worse, and additionally, if/when you do have surgery, your healing time will be exponentially faster than if you weren't in such great shape - so this is not all a wasted effort. You look beautiful, and over time you will figure out which direction to take in order for you to feel best about your body.

Chin up, kid, and remember that whatever may suck right now is still so much better than what it was, it really truly is!

Lauren

[alpha femme]

thanks for the compression shirt idea. i think i need to invest in some better underthings. right now, i'm running in sweats because i can't bear to show my skin, but it's getting so damn hot that i'm going to have to switch to shorts. maybe with 3/4 compression pants, it won't feel so bad on many levels.

[DogMa]

Wish I had something to contribute here. I have some leftover skin, too, but thankfully not as much (I never got past 200, thank goodness). But still, I understand how you feel. I HATE the flabby stuff I just can't get rid of. I'm still hoping it'll tighten up at least some of the way, though.

And yes, I understand about watching what you post on the blog. Sigh. Glad you have a place she doesn't know about.

[alpha femme]

TEEMU GOT HIS CUP!!!

[j0j0ruca]

So where will YOU be Saturday at say 6:30? In a certain parking lot????

[alpha femme]