The MakeMeThinner Support Forum

[nickieluv]

Newest chapter in my crazy baby adventure....

Last night I was rocking the baby to sleep and I just suddenly got very sad and nostalgic and wished I could nurse her. My milk has not completely dried up yet so I'm going to try relactating.

It's not about supply, just the experience and the closeness, so I'm going to try to stay on MF during this experiment. I have some herbs that are supposed to boost milk supply, so I'm going to take those. The only dietary advice I read was plenty of fluids and protein, and MF certainly provides that. I think if I had aspirations of ditching the formula, I'd increase my calories, but I know I'm not going to be her sole source of nourishment.

I have my mom on board to come over every day and help out, so I can nurse a lot and pump a lot, for a couple of weeks. If I'm getting nothing, I will go to 4&2 and see if that helps - if it doesn't, I'll have to re-evaluate my diet. If I did a 3&3 would that be close to 1500 calories? Or at least 1200? I think 1500 is the recommendation for nursing moms, but again, I'm not going to be her sole source of nourishment - I just want to supplement the formula with nursing. And I don't want to just eat whatever, because I know I'll gain weight - I'd like to keep losing, and I have plenty of fat to burn for energy, and MF provides great structure for me. Once my milk supply is up (IF it comes back) I would try to ease back to a 5&1 and see what happens.

I know, after all the heartache I am probably crazy to try again - but it's really, REALLY important to me to breastfeed and I regret giving up so soon. A good sign - she's latched on all day, about 4 or 5 times per side, so she's definitely on board to try it. She's not getting much yet, but she is getting something.

OK, I just had to come here and say that, because the little devil in my head told me to go order pizza or something since I couldn't be on plan and breastfeed, too. So I'm going to stay strong today, stay 5&1 for at least a week and see if I'm making any supply progress, but even if I have to modify I'm not going to abandon the plan - no way! I'd rather maintain or gain a little using MF products than go gain a thousand pounds eating junk (which, come on, we all know I would - it's so easy to go back to those ways!).

Wish me luck, please!

[Karli]

Hi, Nickie,

I do wish you luck ! I hadn't read every detail, but I was actually a bit surprised you were already going to the 5&1 so seemingly soon after having the new arrival, and I figured you must not be breastfeeding (which is, of course, completely your choice !). But, definitely do what you feel is the right thing for you and your daughter ! Once those months are over, they are over ! And, it is very right to be able to eat wisely even while seemingly having an excuse not to. It is the best thing for both of you actually in more ways than one.

I have been thinking more seriously about having kids at some point, thinking maybe in a couple of years or so. When I think about that, I think about how important it is to me to be able to set a really good example regarding eating and my general relationship with my body. It's kind of a major thing these days in the society we live in.

In any event, I do wish you the best .

[nickieluv]

I did try breastfeeding but the baby was having none of it. We quit at 2 and 1/2 weeks. Now, at 6 weeks exactly, I want to try again. There's still time. It'll either work or it won't.

I did make the decision to take at least a week or two to increase my calories. I just have to be sure I did everything to increase my supply. I can do that in a better way than I did today - two supplements, 3 packs of granola bars dipped in peanut butter, a gigantic chocolate chip cookie, and 2/3 of a turkey sub on wheat with Miracle Whip. At least it wasn't greasy stuff - but, it was too much.

And so ends my 12 day streak - but, I can do it again. And once I get some supply going (or don't), I'll be right back on track. But I have lots of chances to lose weight, and only one chance to breastfeed my baby (well, two, I guess, since I already blew the first chance). My goal is to not binge, not eat junk, and get healthy calories into my body.

I am torn, because I was really happy to be on track and losing weight. But I have to try this, because it's best for my baby, and emotionally, it's what I need to do to be sure I've done my best to give her what she needs.

[Karli]

Gotcha. I figured it was something like that. In any event, I support your decision to try again and I think you're doing the right thing to try again for the reasons you indicated (if that's what you want !).

[nickieluv]

It's definitely what I want. And so far, it seems like the baby is up for it, too. So if I can just get some milk flowing we will be two happy campers!

[nickieluv]

Ugh. I need to figure out how to make better choices. I was getting the hang of being on plan, but now that I'm off I just don't know what to do with my food. I'm eating too much, and too much sugary stuff especially.

I really should just look ahead to the maintenance meal plans and use one of them for this two-week stretch trying to build up supply. But (it's pathetic, I know) I feel like that would be wasting the MF food. However, I feel so gross after 3 days off-plan, trying to just 'be good' on my own without any structure, that there's no way it could be worse to get on a plan and use a few MF meals a day. It would have to be better nutrition than I'm getting - it's not all about the amount of calories you have, they should be good calories, too.

My mom says she can start coming over to help on Tuesday, so that's when I'll start pumping, and that's when the 2-week clock starts. Anyone who has a spare moment, cross your fingers or say a prayer or whatever floats your boat, but please send some positive thoughts my way. I figure by the end of 2 weeks of really hard work, I'll know if anything is going to happen or not. And then I can get back to the business of losing weight, even if it works (the breastfeeding), because once my supply is up I can afford to drop the calories a bit - and I'd be happy even if I could only feed her once a day, anyway. But I'm very optimistic because I think, even with just these few days of trying sort of haphazardly, I'm feeling some changes happening in that area. Yay!

[nickieluv]

Well, three days now of pumping and I'm getting more, but still hardly anything. I know I said it wasn't about how much, but still, I'd like to produce at least an ounce at a time. Right now I've have to quintuple my output to even get that!

But, it's still early. I'm hanging in there. And if it doesn't work, I can at least honestly say that I tried everything I could. On the plus side, the little bit of breastfeeding I've been able to do has had a great effect on my relationship with the baby. I feel much more attached to her, and calmer in general, which is nice for my older daughter, too.

Still eating like garbage. Which is to say, mostly not eating, then eating too much for dinner. I miss MF and am eager to come back, and who knows, the way I'm eating it might actually HELP my nutrtion and production. I think I might try to go back to it after the weekend, once I'm on the full dose of herbs and if there's still no real change in output. I'm just such an impatient person, and I want it all NOW!

I've learned a lesson, though. I wanted to quit last time but also didn't want to, and it took over a week of struggling with it every day before I convinced myself it wasn't working (the bf'ing, I mean). If I'd just pumped even once a day, I wouldn't be having this problem now and I could've restarted more easily. A person with my supply problems to begin with is really testing fate, trying to build it up again. But with the next baby, I'll know not to quit no matter what.

I'm enjoying reading how everyone else is doing. Keep it up, all!

[nickieluv]

Getting better - ready to be back on MF but if supply keeps boosting a bit at a time like it has been, I'm going to take another week before starting again.

Weight is pretty steady - up a few pounds but I'm hoping it'll come off quickly in the first week back on.

My brother and sister-in-law, and I think my mom too and maybe my sister, are going to start up MF again this month. So Mike, I might be talking to you about HA issues since 4 people might be willing to sign up. Maybe I could afford my RTDs again....

[Mike]

Sent you a PM

[nickieluv]

I am back back back back BACK!!!! Yay!!

Started today - it was not so long ago that I restarted so I am remembering that I have to stay strong and on-plan or the hunger will never go away. Today has been fine - of course, it's only day 1. I imagine tomorrow will be harder being home alone (hubby at work and then gone at night for a meeting) but I will stick to my guns and go to bed early if I must. Which will be good anyway, even if not for the diet.

The whole BF thing worked out OK, but I put in the time and now I realize I just need to lose weight. I am too big, and we are talking about having baby #3 within a few months, and I have to at least try to lose some weight before getting pregnant again. I'm going to be a smarter pregnant woman this time around, too, and keep exercising (although mildly) and try to keep an eye on calories. Being so overweight I can afford to eat fewer calories as long as I keep things balanced, so I'll look up how many servings of each food group to have to be sure I'm not just eating junk and stay around 1800 calories. Baby will take what it needs from me no matter what I put in my mouth, but I just want to do better for myself.

I don't feel so guilty about trying now because I know I tried very hard with the BF and did what I could. And I don't know for sure I'll dry up being on MF. If I do, though, I will be OK with it. It's more important in the long run that I am at a healthy weight I think. Maybe I'm rationalizing but I'm OK with this decision.

In the usual fashion, I've had only 3 supplements so far and it's almost 7. I could make excuses about today's schedule but even when my schedule is 'normal' I don't do well with timing. So that is my big thing to work on. 100 days is December 22nd - hopefully I'll be out of maternity clothes by then, although I suppose I might be back in them for another reason by then, too. It's all up to hubby whether #3 is a reality or not. I'm all for it, of course.

Anyway, one day at a time - going to be on-plan and start walking every day. (If I don't go for every day, I won't do it, or I'll do three days in a row and then nothing for the rest of the week - so daily it has to be.) Just walking until I feel like I have to stop - or until a child needs me (which might be 2 minutes!).

Leaving now - have to eat three more times today, after all - man I've got to work on this!!

[katieb920]

So glad your back. Greaat minds think a like. Today was day one for me. It was not that bad. I kept myself very busy in this heat wave. I CLEANED THE BATHROOMS....... Water intake was poor though.


Will see you tomoroow

[nickieluv]

Day 1 was pretty breezy. No water to speak of, but I'm not beating myself up about that just yet. Lost 4 pounds overnight - love that initial water weight loss. Even though I know what it is, it's still a thrill to see a much lower number after only one day. Wish that happened every day, I'd be in a bikini by Christmas! Well, not in public since it would be freezing, but still.

Decided to get through 100 days before trying to have baby 3, if that's what we decide to do. Number 1, it's important to me that I actually complete a 100-day challenge - it's like a personal hurdle I need to get past. Number 2, that's enough time to hopefully get back to pre-baby 2 weight (around 205). And number 3, if we decide to wait longer to conceive that 100 days will motivate me to keep going to goal.

Really excited to be back. BF still seems OK so far - sorry to keep obsessing about that but my life has revolved around it for almost 9 weeks now. I'm glad to not have to worry or stress about it - just noting a fact, that it seems to be OK after one day on plan.

Two supplements down already today - I vow to get the timing right today. Did 6/0 yesterday because it got too late to eat (plus I was enjoying the 'not hungry' mood I was in yesterday). I imagine I'll have my L&G today - it always depends on my mood and such. Nice to know I can switch back and forth without problems, and that L&G is always there as an option on my really hungry days.

So did everybody read about the new bars coming that you can have for any meal? Rockin'. I can't wait to order them in November. Since I can't have my RTDs on such a tight budget, I'm hoping these are the same price as a regular meal with the same convenience of grab-n-go.

OK, OK, have to run - baby needs me. Loving being back!!!!!

[nickieluv]

I cannot believe it, but it has been three days already. They have been three busy and (today) stressful days, but still I have been on-plan. I spent a fair amount of time today trying to convince myself I wanted to cheat, but I just didn't want to. I want to lose this weight more than anything. Finally, right? Took me long enough to get focused.

BF'ing is going by the wayside. Not sure why. It's me, emotionally, I don't seem to want to do it as much anymore. I'm content with twice a day, and then whenever she wakes up at night. I'll keep doing that for as long as she wants me to. What is this new feeling? Contentment? Strange, but I'm very peaceful about the whole thing. I enjoy what time I have without fretting about supply or how long it will last. Nice place to be.

Know what else? All my rewards don't seem so important this time. Maybe that will be different as time goes on but I just feel centered, like I know what I want and there is just no other option but to be on plan and lose this weight. I hope these feelings last.

It's strange to not be obsessing about the diet and food. Even when not on a diet I kind of obsess about food a little - looking forward to things that are always forbidden on diets.

I drove by a McDonald's today and thought about when I would pull in and order enough for three people. Tonight I imagined I was thin - and I did not want that greasy food. Perhaps that's the secret? Loving your body as if it is already thin, so that you treat it well?

No good thinking too much - it's just all good here and I'm going to enjoy it while it lasts, because hard times may be just around the corner.

[DogMa]

Glad to hear things are going well, Nickie. Keep it up!

[Mike]

Glad to know you are doing okay. Keep it up girl.